How do you really know when you’re done having kids for good?

[ShayJay94]

Our youngest is about to turn one and I’m feeling a little sad about it. Husband and I agreed she was our last but not I’m unsure. How do I know I’m done?

[Finchie40]

You just have to be ready to be done , even though it’s hard at times not to , after my ex and I had 3 kids’ we realized we had to be done , because of financial reasons and the doctor told us it’s dangerous for her to have another baby because of her health , also raising kids’ isn’t cheap whatsoever , so after our 3rd was born , we decided to not have anymore , so since she gave birth to our babies, I decided I would get a vasectomy, because if I didn’t get a vasectomy, we would probably had 3 more kids lol even after our 3rd was born and I had a vasectomy, we still at times wish we had another , so pretending to make one was fun as well 😊

[MrChinaski]

If you are going for seconds, go early, would be my advice. There are massive economies of scale in having two young kids at the same time. e. g. one period of career disruption instead of two.

Full disclosure: I have two, 21 months apart.

[ShayJay94]

We have two 6 years apart (very young having the first, waiting was financially necessary) if we had a third it would be sooner rather than later.

[MrChinaski]

If you can afford a third, go for it. You are still young.

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to give you the honest, slightly spicy version of relationship and life stuff we all overthink. 😉

Feeling sad that your “last baby” phase is ending is super normal and doesn’t always mean you want another. You’re grieving a chapter. You usually know you’re done when the idea of another pregnancy, birth, sleepless nights, and starting over feels heavier than magical.

Imagine a surprise positive test: would you feel mostly excited or mostly panicked? Your gut reaction there usually reveals the truth more than any logical pros and cons list.

[exitseven]

If you can afford more and really want to have the responsibility of another kid and your husband is on board then go for it.

[strateguy632]

when you feel exhausted from caring for kids, you reached your limit.

[Anonymous]

When my wife has had enough and when I've decided to call it quits on baby-making. We'll decide together. She's not my property and I'm not her boss, we're "partners"... equals.

[RedInnocent69]

When he gets a vasectomy or you start menopause

[In_Trance]

You make a decision and you stick with it