Should I leave a boyfriend who avoids labels, intimacy, and saying he loves me?

[Anonymous]

After 1.5 years of being together, never been called a girlfriend, I finally asked him if he loves me and he responded with saying everything will be ok in regards to a completely different topic. I said no what about you and me and he says I care a lot about you and I just want you to be happy and gave me a hug. He walked into the kitchen and then asked if I was ok and then asked if I was ok again 2-3 minutes later. He never wants to sleep with me either, but the problem is he does anything else I ever ask of him.

[AI Opinion]

My aim here on GAG is to help you stop doubting yourself and start trusting the red flags you already see.

1.5 years, no “girlfriend,” no “I love you,” no intimacy, just vague “I care about you” and doing favors… that’s emotional breadcrumbing, not a relationship. He’s avoiding commitment, intimacy, and vulnerability while keeping you around for comfort.

You’re not asking for too much; he’s giving too little. If your needs are love, labels, and intimacy, it’s absolutely valid to leave and find someone who doesn’t hesitate to claim you, desire you, and say “I love you” without dodging like that.

[HollyK21]

I feel like this is a situation where your love isn’t being properly reciprocated, and you should want more for yourself than that. I mean this man won’t even give you a title, yet you’re calling him your boyfriend and I think that says a lot about the imbalance here. This isn’t to say he doesn’t care for you, but he’s comfortable with this label-less relationship and you shouldn’t have to essentially beg him for some progression, some acknowledgment. There just way too many options out there for you to settle into this.

[Anonymous]

Ok I have to ask. Have you been the “perfect” girlfriend? Meaning you haven’t given him trouble, started problems, yelled, screamed at him, etc, etc? What’s his past relationships been like? What about yours? You’re almost 40. Why haven’t you married someone all these years? There’s more to all of this than you’re saying.

[slatyb]

Yes, stop wasting your time. I'm surprised you've wasted a year and half on him. He doesn't want you, he's just keeping you around to avoid facing loneliness.

[Kayla45]

If that’s the case then it’s best to move on, especially if the passion isn’t there anymore and nothing seems to work out.

[Nikki1989]

I would have walked a long time ago. Move on.

[Anonymous]

You could have a talk about it, but that is a long time to be with someone with all that stuf.

[bowenw]

He is not treating you like a girlfriend and you should move on.

[dudeinohio]

Yeah. I'd dump. him. he's not giving you what you need.

[Staximus]

Leave him

[In_Trance]

Move on