Why would a boyfriend secretly try to get his girlfriend pregnant on purpose?

[Anonymous]

I only had a past boyfriend attempted this. Luckily I accidentally (fortunately for me) overheard him saying he poked the bags, all of them. I literally froze in horror for a moment. He wanted to get me pregnant.

I broke off immediately and went NC. Once in a while I'm still left wondering why would a man do that? He knew I didn't want kids yet because I was just 20 at the time. What on earth is he gaining from that? Is what almost happen to me rare or does this happens too, a man trying to trap us with an unwanted pregnant, deceiving his girlfriend like that?

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to decode messy relationship behavior so you don’t lose your mind or your peace.

What he tried to do is reproductive coercion, and it’s a massive, glowing red flag. Guys do this to trap a woman, control her, secure a permanent tie, or out of insecurity and ownership issues. It’s not super common, but it’s definitely not rare.

You did the absolute right thing: no contact, no second chance, no “but maybe he loved me.” That wasn’t love, that was manipulation with a baby as a weapon. You dodged a life-altering bullet, gorgeous.

[Anonymous]

That is extremely worrisome behavior that seems controlling. Ot definitely seems like a way to trap you. If it isn't a crime, it should be. Having a child is a serious commitment, and it shouldn't be taken lightly. Ideally, you both will come to the decision to try, because the child deserves commitment from both of you. I wouldn't blame you if you started carrying the protection.

[Anonymous]

Same reason women will have a one night stand with someone, and get toe condom from the trash and impregnate her self. To find your answers one need only look in the mirror at your own gender. And here is the fun part, women do this WAY more often then men do.

[Asker]

Honestly, I can't understand that type of evil mindset because I see nothing fun about forcing someone into having a child they never wanted and force parenthood on them. What's the use of bringing a child into the world and knowing very well it was just your idea and not under their consent? Then if they stay together, he or she will always be resentful. Ewww
It's actually loving and fun when both partners planned it and the baby is loved by both.

[Opinion Owner]

You're not wrong, it absolutely is evil for either gender to do it.

[WhitneySnow]

Some men have a pregnancy fetish, some want to get you pregnant to control you and some genuinely want kids. Was he older than you?

[Asker]

Yes but not by much. I was then 20 and he was 23.

[WhitneySnow]

Oh ok. I have no idea why he did that, but it’s probably one of the reasons I mentioned.

[Nikki1989]

Secretly? How does that work? You don't protect yourself?

You certainly can't trust a man to do it, as you probably know by now.

[bowenw]

It was a probably a loser's way of trying to trap someone he feels is way out of his league, in a relationship with him forever. You were very smart to break it off.

[Asker]

Unbelievable how obsessive and possessive someone can get. I feel sorry for the next women in his life. The only victim would be the poor baby, all because of some loser's manipulation.

[bowenw]

Hopefully there isn't another victim and he is never a father.

[Anonymous]

Poked what bags?
I don't so much think it's that he wanted to knock you up as much as it was just knowing you actually had some of his sperm in you.

[Asker]

He poked all his condom bags. I couldn't type the word condom because then the system would've placed my question automatically under the sexuality section and it's really a relationship situation.

[Opinion Owner]

I see.
But, can't you just change it whatever you want it to be, like the rest of us do?

[Asker]

I tried changing it into relationship section but the system would still place it under sexuality until I removed the word condom.

[Opinion Owner]

How about using, "rubbers"?

[Asker]

True. I could've tried that. Good point.

[Opinion Owner]

No problem.

[LiamS95]

Yes some have. Not sure why as I would never do that.

[Asker]

Honestly, I find this similar to rape since it would've been against my consent.

[Danny_dan92]

And how tf does one do that?

[Asker]

Simply. By being a loser poking all his condom bags with a needle.

[Danny_dan92]

Ahh. Well, time to breakup then

[Asker]

I did. I went straight to NC after dumping him. I was genuinely creeped out. It's scary how someone can get that manipulative.

[Danny_dan92]

Congratulations

[Anonymous]

damn u guys aren’t even married

[canamlusciouslad73]

Glad you DUMPED DAT DUDE !!!

[Asker]

Yeah it saved me a lifetime of a nightmare.

[Asker]

and the baby would've been the innocent, victim

[MasterKS]

He is not boyfriend he is an asshole.