My boyfriend and his female friend seem to have more in common.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend whom I've been dating for almost six months now, is friends with a chick he's known for ten years. He says they've never dated and that there relationship is like brother and sister, but I can't help but notice the tension between them when she hangs out with us especially coming from her side. She seems like she really likes him or just likes his attention. She is attractive, smart, likes sports, and has a lot in common with him. She can be a bit aggressive sometimes and acts like a guy. His friends seem to enjoy her company as well as him, but its always made me wonder how come he's never pursued her. (Unless he tried but never told me) but it seems that the attraction seems to be coming more from her side, and sometimes I think he may like her, but then he seems to brush off that possibility (even before I came into the picture) he did however talk about her frequently when we first met which led me to believe maybe he did like her. But I'm just curios if they have so much in common then why doesn't he date her? I'm not saying I want him to. I don't, but it seems that they have a lot in common. Also as far as him and I are concerned we have a good relationship. It was a little rocky in the beginning, but we've overcome our differences and have realized we have more in common then I thought. We really like each other and he always tells me how much he misses me when I'm not around. I'm not exactly the type of girl he's used to dating or even being friends with but he does think I'm really cool and attractive. He says his friend likes me but I can't help but feel she doesn't and is jealous of us together. His friendship with her seems to be of somewhat an importance but so is our relationship. Am I worrying over nothing or should I watch my p's and q's.

[Anonymous]

She could very well be into him. But that's not going to mean a whole lot if he's not into her. And he's not going to become into her. A girl can not be into a guy, and if the guy displays the right personality qualities, it CAN (certainly doesn't always) turn her around. Doesn't work nearly as easily with guys though. If he doesn't look and her and want to bone her, no amount of cool personality traits is likely to change that. So the reason he hasn't gotten with her is that he's not attracted to her.

You said in your comment below that since you've grown into your looks guys have a hard time wanting just friendships with you. So you clearly DO have the look that makes him (and other guys) want to bone you. So I'd say you have the upper hand here.

[Asker]

yeah but she's also attractive as well and she likes sports like he does. I'm not that knowledgeable about sports and science like him and her are, and it makes me think he wish I liked sports more.

[Asker]

Besides I don't want a guy to just like me because he thinks I look good and wants to I qoute "bone me" as you say. I want a guy to like me for more than that. Not just my looks. I'm tired of guys going for my looks purely. Not saying they do, just I don't want someone to judge me good or bad based on how I look. Sometimes I don't even feel that pretty but guys seem to always find me attractive. Maybe it is my personality?

[raptor]

she has a 126 month lead, of course she's going to have more in common with him right now. I'm sure everything will be fine.

[Asker]

So you're saying they have more in common because they've known each other longer. Whenever I try to make male friends they always want more. And if they realize they can't have more they usually stop talking to me as much. That sucks. I wish I could have more of a mixed group. I use to have a lot of guy friends but now since I've matured more and I've grown into my looks guys seem to always be fixated on that and not my personality.