If a guy says he would take you to the beach with a picnic to watch the sunset, what does he really want?

[FiyFiyGirl95]

I'm 17 and this guy who's 18 has been saying that he loves/ is in love with me. He recently told me where he'd want to take me on a date: dinner, ice skating, bowling or he'd even offer to cook dinner for me. He's also invited me to his house to meet his family, but when a guy offers the family and cooking dinner thing is it just innocent or are they secretly hoping for sex (btw I'm not saying all guys are like this, I'm just wondering)? He's also said that he'd want to take me to the beach to have a picnic and watch the sunset, when guys say this what do they actually want? Although like me, he says he's staying a virgin until marriage and that from the moment he fell for me he's honestly never thought about sex, he reads sexual novels by female authors and yesterday told me about a song he was writing which was about how a man was planning a night of raw sexual passion and lust for his girlfriend who he hadn't seen for a long time. He's even offered to take me on a tour abroad, even Paris, if we become a couple in the future. So, by saying these things could he purely just want to spend time with me with no sexual contact, or could he be hoping for that at the back of his mind? I wouldn't be angry if he thought about it as long as he genuinely loves me and won't pressure me. Thanks :)

[angel1142]

If he reads sex novels he might have imagined make love to you at some point.

The fact he wants to remain a virgin until marriage is a good thing though.

I think you should agree on dating him first, and when you know him more and trust him THEN you can feel confident on having a picnic with him on the beach.

All of what he says sounds super sweet you know, you're a lucky girl he likes you that much... do you love him back? Because it doesn't sounds like you are in a relationship yet... First things first, agree to date him if you like him and then see how things are going.

And remember that if you want to remain virgin until marriage, your boyfriend has to respect your decision. It will be all fine ; ).

[Stacyzee]

He genuinely likes you.

If he just wanted sex out of you, everything would be about sex. You two wouldn't be able to maintain a regular conversation without it being mentioned.

Not only that, he wouldn't take you out on dates, he wouldn't introduce you to his family/friends,

he'd just pretty much want to know when will you two be able to be intimate.

I know its scary, the thought of someone using you.

But trust me, with the information you have provided that isn't the case.

[Stacyzee]

Of course its human nature to want sex. But a guy will only go so far to get it. He likes you and its clear! You deserve great so don't let a great person slip away.

[kholland65]

sigh...this is why guys can't win with women. No matter how nice we are to you, you assume we just want sex. If I told you I wanted to treat you like sh*t, make fun of you, and ignore you, would that make you think that I wanted to date you and love you? Just seems to contradictory and cynical to me. Do you see how your logic presents a lose-lose situation for any guy?

[Cookies4Thought]

Well, lets start with 'win'. It is not about winning. | Blame your gender for boasting about conquests & treating us like s-x objects | That depends how you signed it to me - guys do all those things because we try to show you love and care, you must be new to earth, welcome | Male logic is universal and consistent with your wants, and when our needs do not match up with your wants you get childish. | Do you see how your logic works? It is easily proved wrong time and time again.

[kholland65]

I actually do not see what you are getting at and am thoroughly confused. I don't me win as a literally term. It's a figure of speech. All I'm saying is if a guy is an a**hole and pervert, he just wants to get in your pants, but if he's nice and treats you with respect, then he must be scheming to get in your pants and screw you over as well. So all I'm asking is what does that leave? It seems that no matter what a guy does, he's assumed to be up to no good.

[kholland65]

BTW there also seems to be the idea that women have, that men are supposed to treat sex and love as exclusive from each other. If a guy really loves you, he's also going to want to have sex with you...bad. But because of this mentality that women have, where both should be exclusive, some guys just hide their sexuality for fear of scaring the girl off, when in fact, even the nice guy who wants to give you the world, in the back of his mind wants to f*** the sh*t out you. We're human after all.

[TheUglyOne]

Guys who are just after sex tend to try avoiding her family. They also don't do most of that smarmy romantic stuff, just enough to get her to agree to sex.

Simply go along with it, if he pressures you for sex later on, then he's shown his true intents.

Keep in mind though any healthy male will desire sex, just make sure that's not all he wants.

[artfullyliving]

he wants you to be his girlfriend

[Prettygurl12]

Sweetie, he has a penis. He wants sex.

[Anonymous]

He's 18. He wants sex.