How come in interracial relationships I see more white girl/black man than vice versa?

Question

Is it because white men don't find black women attractive? just curious

talloak · Accepted Answer

I've wondered about this for a long time. The difference was even more stark when I was your age. There are so many theories put forth here but no hard data to back them up. I found a table for the reply rates by race for men and women of various races sending messages on OKCupid to be found here: link

The results really surprised me. Of all races, black women had the highest response rates to men of all races. Their response rates were lowest for black men (although still above the average for all women) and highest for whites and Pacific Islanders. This contradicts the theories that black women are not attracted to white men. Alternatively. women of all other races apart from Native American had a much lower than average reply rate for all races apart from whites.

From the other side, black women received the fewest replies across all races. Of all races, white men returned the fewest replies to women of all races, but especially to black women.

Thus, if reply rates represent levels of attraction (as opposed to courtesy), and the members of this site are representative of US daters in general (they claim that the results represent over a million people), then the reason for the difference is that while black women are attracted to white men, white men (and other races) are less attracted to black women.

It doesn't seem fair to me. And for the record, I'm a white man who has dated black women.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Because that is what is pushed most through media, cartoons, etc. The less intelligent someone is the more susceptible someone is to outside influence. Just like why are Coca Cola, Pepsi, And Dr. Pepper, etc, more popular than Mr Pib, Shasta, or other cheaper soft drinks. Cartoons and what not started depicting black male and white female characters in relationships order to reduce racial tension and decrease racism. Which this sort of information manipulation and data bias is why MOST people don't have a clue that Charles Darwin was a racist that pushed his THEORY of MACRO evolution (aka evolution vrs adaptation which is actually scientific and observable with evidence to support it) (which there is not SCIENTIFIC evidence to support Darwin/macro evolution) to help support claims of certain races being inferior to others and essentially a call to have them removed from society.

In short, people are dumb and it's what's "popular" and so the stupid and the foolish fall into simple things like that without question of "why?". But hey, it's probably best that not everyone knows so much, other wise simple information like the information in the book "The Bell Curve" might be taken advantage of by more people and cause further issues.

Anyway, I am well aware there will be plenty of fools to hate on this answer, but it is my answer nonetheless.

Luv2BRealExotic13 · Accepted Answer

No one knows about the other. Instead of looking at the person everyone is looking at the whole ethnic background. Like a blissful ignorance. I've been around white guys dated one or two. But I've never approached them because in my opinion you never really know with them. I've heard some date women from other ethnicities for a partial ism, to see what it's like, but who wants to be a partial ism? That's not fun. Then a lot of them can be crazy racist jerks, like some of the obvious ones answering. Or they're family can be racist. So most of the time it's just waters no one ventures to and go with who you know. Then as black women, we tend to be stereotyped as loud, angry, and obnoxious which is dumb because everyone can be loud, angry and obnoxious, why it's counted as a negative for black women and nobody else I don't know.

As for black man/white woman, I honestly see a type of stigma, not that he really likes her he just wants to try her or someone not black. Which is annoying to me because she could be the trashiest brawd, him not genuinely in love with her, thinks he maybe more socially accepted and it's like she's white not you, but just want her because she isn't black. For both scenarios in my opinion I wouldn't be bothered with it if it were known they were dating out of a genuine love and respect for the other person.

Miyani11 · Accepted Answer

There's Asian women/White men relationships too. It's very abundant. Come to WA, Oregon, or Cali and I'll show you lol.

Black women date interracially too. There's a lot of African women who date and marry White men, especially in WA and the West coast. Black women more so date mixed or Latino guys over white on the East Coast. Most military families are interracial on the West. East & South is more intraracial.

But It mostly depends on the demographics of each state and the male to female ratio that determines interracial dating factors. If you work and live in an environment where it's mostly white or black or Latino, you tend to date based on that. Most mixed people date other mixed people or minorities. I know a lot of black/white girls who date other black/white guys and I know a lot of black/white girls who date black, white, or asian.

I'm mixed and most of my ex-bfs were mixed too. Also to place into that factor, my school's environment mostly consisted of white and mixed people. Most of the attractive guys are mixed, I tend to date based on what attracts me. My work environment was also mostly mixed people. My friends are also mostly mixed and so is my family. It's a preference since my environment is mostly mixed. So it's environment and preference that goes into play when interracially dating.

bombdotcom · Accepted Answer

White men are generally not attracted to black women. It's not racism, it's preference.

White men approach Hispanic and Asian women without hesitation or the "cultural differences" excuses.

And statistics show white men are more likely to date or marry Hispanic or Asian women in terms interracial relationships.

Plus, there's too much social baggage that would come along with dating a black girl, versus a black guy dating a white girl. White guys have to worry about lectures from their parents (about what the children would face), jungle fever jokes or "really, a black girl" type of comments friends and the likelihood of stares.

George Lucas apparently caught flack for dating Mellody Hobson, despite the fact that she's successful and wealthy on her own. But it wasn't acceptable among his circle.

It's nothing personal...

Dandeus · Answer

I think you can chalk it up to a few reasons.

On the female/black side, black women in particular are overwhelmingly more likely to be single. They date and marry less often and later in life. So there may simply be an issue of availability relative to black men.

On the male/white side, there are racial perceptions. Ignoring serious, long term romantic relationships and just looking at short flings, young white women often pursue black men because it's more taboo for women to date interracially (and thus more tempting to break the taboo), as a form of rebellion against disapproving parents, and there is also black male penis myth that entices a lot of white women. On the white/male side, those myths are reversed. The interracial taboo isn't as strong for men, so there's less temptation to break it. I also think there's a perception among some white guys that goes like this: all black men are well hung > if black men are well hung, black women must prefer a well hung man > I'm not black, so I'm not well hung > black girls won't date me because I'm not as well hung as a black man. So there's some intimidation there as well.

jslxoxo · Answer

I think that could reason why for some.

- I also think history with slave masters/white men raping black women back then could be another reason for some. I think it makes it awkward considering the history.

- Lack of exposure to black women or white men, or seeing bw & wm couples. Growing up, bm & ww couples were the ONLY IR couple I seen. I didn't see my first bw &wm coulple until high school, I think.

-Stereotypes

- Or black women being seeing as sex objects. I've met a lot of white guys who think so, so it kinda ruins it for those who are genuinely interested .

Anonymous · Answer

I find black women interesting and attractive. You tend to find it more socially acceptable for black men and white women to be together. A big reason of that is that it is viewed as inherent racism or fetishism for a white man to be interested in a black woman.

Also, there is tremendous pressure on the woman to find "a good brotha" and reaffirm her racial identity. Finally, a lot of it is cultural upbringing. From physical preferences to worrying about how their parents would react (both the black woman and the white man).

Personally, people need to get over their fear and just go and enjoy the interesting differences between people of different races and cultures.

Michaelmwm19 · Answer

I think it boils down to this, let me break it down for you. Men are generally do the approaching, white men like myself, find black women attractive we just assume for whatever stupid reason that she wouldn't date us because she doesn't like white men.

Black men go for it and approach the white women.

That's just what I think anyway.

CasaNorba · Answer

i've asked myself this question all my life. to be honest I think I only seen two black/white couples (white dude/black girl) in my whole time being alive. I think it probably has a lot to do with the stigma that black people have? I mean after all we men are a lot more careful...

when we men come across chicks who have stigmas we are more likely to say "hell no! I'm stay away" while women don't think and just go for it.

lets not forget that women do benefit from the stigmas that black men have. women do love to date dudes who are trouble makers that society will always fear

dodgypirate · Answer

As a white I can honestly say that interracial relationships between a white guy and a black girl are quite prominent, at least here in the UK. I personally was in a relationship with a half Chinese half St. Lucian girl.

I've had my eyes on a few black girls here at Uni, but it seems that most of the time they are more likely to stick with their Ethic group.

Mixed race black girls attract me very much - best of both worlds :)

dee_bee · Answer

Like everyone said here, it's more common. But I am very attractive to white guys. As a matter of fact I have really only talked to white guys. It's not because I am scared or what not of black men but the guys who have approached me have been rude and condescending and not attractive. I think that a lot more girls might be attracted to white men but don't say anything out of fear? What their families might think?

martyfellow · Answer

Mostly it's good healthy fear. You date a black woman, there's a real risk of a guy who thinks she belongs to him coming after you with a gun. Two people I know have been shot for dating a black woman, one of them fatally.

Black guys don't have to worry about this happening..at least not outside the rural South, anyway. There might be resentment of the guy from exes and so forth, but no one is going to come after him with a gun.

yawst · Answer

I'm an Asian guy and where I live there just isn't a whole lot of black girls that I can see. I wish there were more cause I'd like to friend them! Many black girls are pretty like the China girl on the Disney channel and Zooey Saldana. There are two at my school also quite pretty. When people are exposed to another group they learn to see their beauty more I think

LoveBambi · Answer

WW/BM relationships are more common because it's socially accepted. No one really bats an eye when White women date interracially but when BW do it they're likely to be scolded. It's sort of taboo in a way and people are likely to point fingers at the pairing and say dumb shit.

Anonymous · Answer

Black people have more testosterone than white people. The more testosterone a man has, the more attractive he is. The more testosterone a woman has, the less attractive she is. East Asians have less testosterone than white people, which probably explains the 'Asian fetish' that many non-Asian men have.

Stayinganon · Answer

For whatever reason it's a feat for a black man to "get" a white woman (in most cases) and they are usually praised by their friends for it. And I've heard black women get shit for dating white guys. It's not fair but it's what it is.

TheManHimself · Answer

Because white guys sleep with black girls but rarely date them because men are very insecured. Women are generally more confident and don't care what people think as long as they feel happy.

Anonymous · Answer

Most black women don't find white guys attractive. (It's gotta be at least 90%) because I've seen so many black women say they don't find them attractive, whether in real life, Internet. Nearly all of them said they don't find them good looking.

That's why. Seems like black women only black guys attractive which is fine. That's their preference.

pr3ttybr0wn · Answer

Most black girls aren't really interested in white guys. No offense anyone

Anonymous · Answer

I think that's wrong. I'm what most people call a white guy even tho my parents are 100% latin. Black girls like me and I have dated one for 2 years. In that relationship I saw a bunch of white guys/ black girl relationships. until we broke up, now I don't see any. but this white guy likes  chocolate.

GreatnessPersonified · Answer

"Is it because white men don't find black women attractive?" I've heard it's the opposite way around.

novemberbaby · Answer

I've noticed the same thing... And a lot of times its white trash 40 somethings that have 4 kids with 5 different men, usually black I don't know I don't judge something, just unintentional social trends I guess, what evs.

Volxen · Answer

I'm a white male and I find black women attractive.

Anonymous · Answer

Black women typically aren't attracted to White men. Not 100% of them, but the majority. They usually say "White boys are too corny." White men typically aren't attracted to Black women either.

Neither group are that interested in each other.

YoungAthleticOne · Answer

Im not sure honestly. My only explanation is that it could be that black women are less willing to date outside their 'race'. That's my only explanation.

kjahradio · Answer

Black men think of white girls as a prize a status symbol.  when white guys like me don't view black women as anything special.  I think white girls are the most attractive and black men think the same obviously.

Theguyoverthere · Answer

I know a white guy who married a black girl so it does happen.

Anonymous · Answer

From what I've seen, there are a bit more white guy/non-white girl than anything, including white/black relationships. So does that mean your observation is wrong, or mine?

Anonymous · Answer

Because black women aren't really open to dating interracially  except on GaG they are thirsty  . They are always looking for acceptance and validation from white guys on here.

Anonymous · Answer

Probably because black guys approach women and black girls don't approach guys

Dionysos · Answer

Some don't.  More for me.  :-)

SaltandVinegar · Answer

White girls are considered more attractive by guys

How come in interracial relationships I see more white girl/black man than vice versa?

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