Search Results: he makes me look bad

I think she said it beautifully.

It’s that anyone MUST initiate. But rather, to wait just for the sake of waiting. For permission. To live. Is detrimental.

“Q : How do I ask a guy out on a date?

A : Did you know, that when it comes to psychology, when you say to someone you’re attracted to them, this increases their curiosity to you and even gets them thinking you’re attractive. It can, if the person sees you attractive already at an unconscious level, get him to start thinking of dating you.

Did you also know, that most men, the confident ones, whether it’s a bad boy or someone who is just confident guy, will be very impressed by you asking him out.

Did you also know, that you can tell if the persons values, the world is positive or stinks, shallow, by asking them out on a date. If that person who is a friend or someone you just met starts acting weird, ignores you, this tells you a lot about how deep down, they are not really good person. They judge people a lot, they are shallow.

A person who takes it as a compliment, even if they say they are not interested will be nice to you, and when you see them again, they’ll be looking forward to saying hello to you. That shows they have goodness inside them and they feel a lot of empathy.

Did you also know…the experienenced, confident guys or guys who have never dated, like open communication. They don’t like the games, the hints. Many guys are like that anyways.

When you say it, it is a relief for them because they know you’re not into the mind games, you’re not insecure and you are sincere.

Did you also know, you’re not the only one attracted to the guy.

There are women who are and so, if you don’t make the move then you make it possible and increase the chance to 95% that the other, whoever she is, who asks him out, gets the guy.

Did you also know, whenever you don’t take action on something or someone you want, your growth is slowed down. You’re not learning, growing in confidence. “

CONTINUED* 👇🏽

30F either DA or FA, want to say I’m some kind of avoidant. Based on life experiences, are these pretty tell tale signs I’m probably…well not attractive? I’ve always questioned how almost every pretty woman I’ve come across is always in a relationship with an equally attractive guy. When I was chubby younger, I thought losing weight would solve everything and it hasn’t. I feel like regardless of what anyone else says, I’ll always wholeheartedly believe attractive women have no issue finding a partner & they have life easier. I’ve been told I’m attractive by a variety of people for most of my life, even when I was chubby. I’m not thin, 5’7 women’s US 10 so midsize but I have that thicker thigh/flatter stomach build. The only time I get attention from guys I find attractive are on dating apps and that’s not telling in my opinion. I’ve been told this guy looked at me/this guy found me attractive from other people but the guy never makes it known to me. And there’s been very very few times where I would see an attractive guy making eye contact with me or at least caught my gaze but I just look away b/c I don’t see the point. I’m anxious/reserved but a lot of people with anxiety are in fulfilling relationships.

Last thing I’ll add was being bullied pretty badly as a kid, again I was chubby so I know this played a part. Worse in middle school, I didn’t have to be homeschooled but it still sucked really freaking bad. And in HS but not as extreme as middle school, HS was more mean girls if anything. As an adult at old jobs, I did have confrontation/clashing w/personalities too. And let’s not forget shit bosses. Since I’ve worked remotely for the past few years, I haven’t had drama with coworkers or mgmt. Let’s hope it stays that way, I’ve had to deal with toxic family members too but that’s a thing of the past.

I’M SO CONVINCED THESE THINGS DON’T HAPPEN TO ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE

We’re currently in a dating app era & the idea behind dating apps seems practical yet you hear more bad than good things about them. Almost 30 & I’ve never been in a LTR, I have accomplished everything I currently want out of life but been able to find a quality guy. I’ve owned a condo & strive to eventually own a home in a few years, are dating apps to blame behind being single or is there more to it (aka am I the issue)? I’ve been told I’m attractive by all kinds of people for a good chunk of my life but I’ve never been approached in person by a guy I’d like to date (getting checked out doesn’t count).
The only times guys I find attractive have acknowledged me were on dating apps, it’s just there’s times where maybe I feel burnt out & can’t be bothered to end up meeting that guy in person.

Or when I feel like I have *options*/ I’m in a mood where I just don’t want to put in the effort. And when the app outlook looks dismal at a given moment (like now), I consider deleting & reinstalling at a later time. I get bored after communicating too long etc, it may seem like self sabotage topped with my terrible anxiety but I’ve never felt SO unsure about something in my life & that *something* is dating. Unsure if my lack of libido/lack of interest in being sexual might play a part (no health issues). There’s always that voice in the back of my mind that makes me think the right guy will change all of that but who really knows. I’m worried I’ll be shriveled up & when I finally have that drive, it’ll be too late to find a match. I heard an influencer say the other day that there shouldn’t be pressure or a rush to date, it’s an opportunity that’ll always be available.

TL; DR: Is dating hard for most? And is my case bad luck or someone unsure of what she wants?