Search Results: guy shares his feelings

The backstory is a guy I met online over a year ago started acting different and friend zoned me some months after I found out his real identity.

I’m feeling hurt and I want him to know that but also open to talking through the issue if he wants to.

I came up with two different messages I’m thinking of sending. One is really long and the other is more to the point without excessive details.

We still talk regularly.

Which do you prefer?

A. Hey so there’s something that I’ve been wanting to share with you for quite awhile now.

I’m feeling confused and hurt knowing that you continued to engage in sexual conversations with me for so long when you were actually feeling wary of me. It really makes me wonder if you are being genuine with me at all.

As I said almost a year ago, I fully understand if you don’t want to talk now that I know who you are. But feeling like I need to pretend that I don’t know your name and having to wonder whether you’re talking to me just to avoid conflict makes me feel like the connection might not be natural anymore.

I know I can’t change your feelings, but I’m working on cultivating more self-love and that doesn’t negate mine. As much as I enjoy talking to you, unless we can talk this through and change our dynamic, I feel that I’m disrespecting myself by continuing to chat with you.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this!

B. Hey so I wasn’t expecting you to reach out after I left (website where we met) and after some thought, I think I need to let this friendship go.

I’m working on cultivating more self-love, and as much as I enjoy talking to you, unless our dynamic changes, continuing to do so is hurting my self-esteem.

Open to talking about it but also don’t want to bore you with a long message.

Take care 😊

My cousin is transgender, and I suspect the guy I was talking to had a sexual interest in transgender women based on things I noticed about him. I opened up to her about how his actions, along with other things he did, left me feeling hurt, unattractive, and not good enough. He ghosted me, and on top of that, I realized he had other sexual preferences that I wasn’t aware of.

I shared my feelings with my cousin, but I still have conflicting emotions about it all. At one point, I even asked her to look at his social media to see if I had missed anything, but then I told her to forget it because I didn’t fully trust her. I worried she might talk about me behind my back, and the thought of that triggered a breakdown because, despite everything, I still have strong feelings for him and just want to feel like I’m enough for him.

However, she went ahead and looked anyway. I found out through my mother that my cousin had not only checked his social media but even attempted to reach out to him. When I confronted my mother, she dismissed my feelings and defended my cousin, saying she would never do anything like that—despite her actions proving otherwise. My mother then tried to gaslight me, saying things like, “I’m sure you’ve done things too,” which was incredibly hurtful.

It broke my heart because I would never betray a family member like that or try to interfere with someone they had been involved with.