Search Results: what does sex feel like

I met an amazing guy, who is my age.
My dad does not agree with the relationship because he thinks I'm being lustful and emotional and taking my focus off my education, which is funny because he never took the time to ask me how I'm going with my studies but the minute he knows I'm in a relationship he says that even after I told him that my grades have improved and that I go better in school ever since I've been with this guy.

I have an African dad, and most African people or at least Nigerian people, when they hear relationship they think immediately of sex outside of marriage. And me being in a relationship at 18 is like me being rebellious and thinking I can do whatever I want because I'm 18, that's what my dad thinks. But the reality is that I met this guy now at 18 and I couldn't let the chance go.

He tries talking me out of this relationship he does not care about the fact that I'm genuinely happy and that many things have improved in my life... for once I do not have to deal with everything alone. All he cares about is me being submissive and taking his word as law.

My aunty called and said the same thing and basically that I'm too young and that I should just focus on my education. I just feel stressed, overwhelmed and misunderstood.

Even when it comes to lust or sex... as a Christian couple we talked about these things and we have boundaries and our thoughts aren't focused on those things at all because we believe that things like that should be done in the confines of marriage.

But yet, nothing, almost as if no one other than my mom and close friends understand.

I feel overwhelmed because I've always wanted a guy like the guy I currently have right now yet it's like I can't be happy.

My dad, and my aunty and I'm sure my other close relatives will continue to say the same thing, they make me feel young and stupid, I'm even tired of standing up for myself and relationship. It is exhausting, I just want to be happy, I don't know what to do.

My boyfriend and I have been long-distance dating for closer to 4 years, and it's been a rollercoaster for many reasons. But, recently, we both finally had an opportunity to spend a night together at a hotel and enjoy ourselves. As soon as we walked in since I had not seen him for some time, he wanted sex. I wanted to do it as well because, mentally, I thought it would be fun for us both. However, while we were doing it, he kept telling me not to take my shirt off and other stuff that seemed distant. He finished and was quiet, giving a stand-offish vibe afterwards. I kept asking him what the issue was, and he insisted it was nothing. Finally, once I got ready for the event he wanted to go to, he stated that he was worried about my health since I had gotten "bigger."

My weight has fluctuated a lot throughout the years in early adulthood, especially with working and college. When we met, I was on the smaller side, but it was an unhealthy time for me, hardly eating. I got on the hormonal IUD for him, and that caused me to gain a lot of weight.

I started crying and asked if he was ashamed of me, if he was still wanting me in that way, the works basically because of my body. He apologized a while later about it, and admitted saying that I deserve better which was also weird. I'm not sure how to really feel or go about this since he is health-crazy and wants to make sure I live a long life with him. However, his behavior did not match up to what he was saying. I mentioned it to a few friends to which they said that he might have seen better and now has a desire for that, or he's using health as a scapegoat to cover up his lack of wanting me now. What do you think? I'm afraid he doesn't find me attractive anymore but the weight is mainly because of him wanting this birth control in me. Do you think he is just using me for sex/companionship? Does he actually love me?