Search Results: sex with an older woman

I actually felt sad for this infidelity story I've once read at Reddit. It was written 2 years ago. The woman was 39 (she must be 41 by now) and her now husband cheated on her with a co-worker. He spent some of his wife's money on the affair and took her homemade meals and desserts to secretly feed the other woman. He cheated as a 40 year-old married man with 3 kids. He ended up having a mid-life crisis and supposedly wanted to see what it was like having sex with another woman, even briefly fell in love with the other woman. She forgives and agrees to marriage counseling. She felt she owed him one and clearly wants to save the marriage.

Flashback to 2002 when they were just boyfriend and girlfriend:

When the woman was much younger (then 19 years old), she cheated on her then boyfriend (now husband) with his best friend Tony. He caught her in a compromised position, both asleep in the couch with the TV running on. Supposedly the guy was in boxers and she was with jeans on but only with bra on top. Apparently they had already finished doing the deed by then and there was alcohol. It was an affair going on for 3 months. She's been repentant for all those years, never cheated again and was faithful as a fiancee and wife. She got forgiven and (yes he still proposed 5 years after the cheating incident, claiming he forgave her completely and wouldn't bring it anymore) they still got married.

https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/comments/yozb12/my_husband_40_m_and_i_39_f_are_working_things_out/

On the woman's previous post, she actually is full of guilt all over again and feels she deserved it. Did she deserved to get cheated on 20 years later? She cheated in 2002 as a 19 year-old girlfriend with no kids. He cheated as a 40 year-old married man with 3 children?

Going to be 30 soon & ask myself why I’m incapable of being in a relationship with a man, people can say that I’m picky but I don’t fully believe I should take all the blame. Female friends I’ve had in the past seem to get dates easier/are okay with putting out & some have unintentionally made me second guess my looks, as they seem to have it easier yet other people have told me I’m equally/more attractive than they are. The last time I “dated” someone was when I was in my early twenties & I’m glad that ended because this guy felt like settling. It justifies that love isn’t blind & it’s better to be alone vs being in a mediocre relationship. I know I’m not all that but I feel like I should be able to attract quality men, all my life I feel like I’ve been invisible to men. I’ve never been approached in person by a guy I’d like to date (don’t count dating apps) & the very few times someone told me that a guy found me attractive (normally a guy I also thought was attractive), they never told me directly & it was always word of mouth.

I feel like I am cursed, that last person I saw in my early twenties was through a dating app & that’s how I’ve met all of these men I’ve met up with. The apps are continually getting worse & they’ve always had a bad rep, getting matches are never an issue it just fails to go anywhere for a number of reasons. And sometimes when I’ve met guys in person & it didn’t work out, there’s just something about them that doesn’t live up to my expectations (even though they look like their pics). I’m unsure if my dating logic is unrealistic, dating apps are the only way for me to meet people & don’t understand how I can be this old & haven’t been in love yet.

The last thing I’ll add is my lack of sex drive, masturbation doesn’t do anything for me & I haven’t had sex since I saw that person back in my early twenties. However, it’s known that some women need to be in a healthy relationship in order to have that *sexual desire*.

Obviously both are liars and scams, using deception to get what they want. Though would say you baby-trapping a man is worse than strining along (giving them false promises of marriage and kids) women?

Male method: He's been living with his girlfriend for 8 years and he already knows from the longest that he won't ever marry her. Yet he doesn't see the relationship as that bad, just that he sees her as a good girlfriend but not enough to be a wife. So he keeps with sweet talks and false hopes. The woman continues believing him but gets depressed the relationship isn't progressing. She's not happy. Or he proposes with a cheaper ring and keeps her as a fiancee just to give her false hope and keep her from leaving but never plans a wedding date. By wasting her time, he's taking away her fertile years.

Female method: She's been living her with boyfriend for some years but is fed up with the situation. So she elaborates a plan to pretend to be on birth control or secretly sabotage it. Sometimes the woman already knows the guy isn't the type to bail out and is against abortion or she does this to someone that believes a child should be raised with marriage. Knowing that, she got what she wanted; a short-cut to a proposal and then marriage. She might even take that secret to the grave. The man ends up believing the birth of his child as an accident or miracle from god if he's religious.

This is how a baby-trapping (this woman got marriage out of that deception and the man never found out) story looks like:

https://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/3427335-my-20-year-old-lie-secret.html#google_vignette

Both were about satisfying their own desires and needs; selfishness. Even though both are doing despicable acts (deception is already bad), would you say baby-trapping is worse? The reason I think it's worse is because an innocent baby (a small, living human) is used as part of the deception, scam. I think that's worse than even using someone for sex or money.

I'm 37, childless but I've been speaking to a companion for a long while now. We've already spent quality time (no sex yet) and are thinking of settling down soon. I always thought getting pregnant by a boyfriend that later on cheats or never commits is worse. If I can have kids in the right manner so beat it. I'm unwilling to bring an innocent child misery.

In the end, out of the two less favorable positions for a woman would my position (older and childless) be better than be younger and already with 2-3 kids of different men?