How do older men feel about dating younger women?

Question

I’ve recently met someone, connection is great, sex if amazing for the both of us… I’m under the impression we like each other but both of us are not ready for relationship at this point in both our lives. We have great boundaries and communication but there is an age gap of 17 years. That being discussed by the both of us to an extent, I’m still not sure if a potential monogamous relationship is something he’s comfortable with. Just wondering how other men feel about dating monogamously? for reference I’m 20, he's 37.

Stevepro68 · Accepted Answer

So complex on many levels the difference between a soon 40 year old and 23 year old is huge. That same time gap at 70 and 53 is less so. We develop and mature so much in our 20s that it's a huge gap. That said I am 55 and my girlfriend is 36. We have a lot in common despite our age. Kids are the same age, we are both divorced. We are both financially secure and have our own career. We have been together for 5 years. Do the math. So I am happy not because she is younger than me. When I first divorced I realized very young women were like owning a Ferrari. Looks great impressive to your friends but ultimately not compatible with day to day life. High maintenance and high cost, undependable and not as great as you think it's going to be. We are happy because our age difference is one tiny issue that has little to do with why we love each other. Have fun enjoy each other. As long as he is not dating you in a controlling way. It's fine. A lot of older younger couples that I know have this weird "daddy" dynamic and he is very controlling. It never works out of you are not equals. in my opinion

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

If the connection and chemistry is there between you both , that’s all that matters , Age is just a number. You are both of legal age of consent so don’t listen to negative people who try to run their 2 cents together and have no clue what they are talking about. All that matters is the both of you are happy with each other. I don’t hold age as a deciding factor when I meet a great girl that is of legal age of consent and is beautiful and amazing to me , the connection her and I share together is all that matters. So if you really like this guy , Go for it , it’s your life and your choice , no one else’s. Most older guys’ love younger girls’ and most younger girls’ love older guys.

Apple1996 · Accepted Answer

At 37 he should be more ahead in life than to be wasting time on a 20 year old. It's a huge red flag on his part

MK1997 · Accepted Answer

They like sex with young women, relationship I don't know

DishLady · Answer

If the guy can land a young chippy I’m pretty sure he’s over the moon, though keeping up with her — and tolerating social “father-daughter” commentaries I’ve had the misfortune of overhearing over the years — isn’t always sustainable.

ManOnFire · Answer

That is a major no for me.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I'm fine with the age gap.

How do older men feel about dating younger women?

But here's what usually craps on that for me... the girl. Of course what kind of 18-20 year old is getting with a married dude that has kids, and is my age? Not long term and commitment worthy type girls. In fact most of them are cheating on a boyfriend that's her own age.

But, obviously if it's two people with a monogamous mindset, I think it would work just fine. In fact better, because a lot of the problems a younger male would present to you are non-factors a lot of the time for older males. I mean even in a sex friend situation... catching feelings, emotional outbursts, and so on... just saying there is a reason they pick me and not someone their own age.

HawkPerception · Answer

Age genuinely doesn't matter to me. The only things that matter are physical attraction and compatibility. Compatibility in the sense of similar views, interests, way of thinking, flowing communication, sexual compatibility, etc.

I could date a 50 year old happily and I could date an 18 year happily if I have that kind of connection with them. Also, it's more uncommon, but it definitely happens in life. My friend is getting married to a guy 13 years older than her next month. My cousin got married to a guy 16 years older than her. And my grandma and grandpa had 15 years of difference between them. 20 years of difference also happens.

As long as you're past puberty, the attraction is mutual, and there's consent, I see nothing wrong with any age gap.

If you REALLY care about being socially accepted then you can follow the half your age plus 7 rule though.

Skinhead-1979 · Answer

I think with 45 years I can be classed as 'Older'.

I wouldn't... Sure, I see a look of beautiful, cute, very interesting young females... but I am really looking... IF I'd be looking (I am not)... for a female who is more on the same level as I am.

I am really not keeping up anymore with what young adults are up to nowadays and I often find myself shaking my head (I know... My parents did the same when I was in my 20s). The language which is often being used might as well be Sumerian to me. Music wise we are often not on the same level... and I really do not have the energy to go along in every attention-seeking whim which pops up. I am old fashion.

lightbulb27 · Answer

um... sex makes babies, sometimes not intentionally, and ties you together for decades... I'd figure stuff out before the other stuff... so backup is right...

it's a lot and you are quite young, it can work and has for many.

if he ain't got his stuff figured out at 37, then he needs therapy asap and you need to sit in to hear what the snag is.

Levin · Answer

There's a girl at my work and the age difference is 18 years... It's inappropriate in most people's eyes. But I would totally go for it if the situation presented itself...

Men are ultimately attracted to younger women. Women are attracted to older men.

Just... don't get used for sex. Unless that's what you want. That all depends on the quality of the man.

meepmeeperton · Answer

I mean I'm sure a 37 year old guy enjoys having sex with a 20 year old chick...

As far as a monogamous relationship goes he may be more apprehensive about that. Older guys tend to feel that they don't want to steal your young years away from you, or possibly that you won't be on the same maturity level as him for a full time relationship.

normalice · Answer

He is not dating you. He is using you for your firm ass.

I think dating a girl that young would be awkward, personally, but there are ways it could happen I suppose. Suffice it to say if she is mature enough that I'm entertaining the idea, at all, I wouldn't find it awkward after that.

Anonymous · Answer

Honestly, it varies from guy to guy. Some men just like a bit of time with a younger gal without making it a serious relationship, while other men would be more than happy to get serious with them.

My suggestion is to act in a manner that is accordance with what YOU want, and if it's not what he wants then he'll let you know. Maybe at some point you can even be a little more upfront about it and ask him what his long-term intentions might be (sometimes it's good to tell him it's okay to be honest, since some guys might feel shamed for not wanting something long term and therefore might try to avoid being entirely straightforward).

Anonymous · Answer

Exactly why is the ready for a relationship? Why aren’t you? Maybe I’m wrong but I doubt he wants something real w you. It’s just about sex. Of course a lot of older men would screw younger girls. Some for fun. Some cause they really like her so they want a relationship w her. But in your case something tells me no, he’s just in it for the fun.

Anonymous · Answer

It’s not the age gap. It’s that it’s a super sexual relationship and you’re probably not even serious yet. Whores…. Get a grip.

That’s what makes it creepy is people like you. So when two people genuinely like one another it leaves A bad taste in your mouth.

Vegasrunner · Answer

I date a lot of younger women, however personally even that age gap is a bit much for me. Not necessarily the 17 years but 37 - 20 is a awkward age gap in my opinion. w/ that said though I don't see anything wrong w/ it if you guys are both fine with it. The biggest issue for me with that gap is you're now a late 30's man but you'll be around teens and 20' somethings taking on their problems.

mobiusforniner · Answer

I’m 37. Uh, I don’t go around looking for 20 year old girls. Sorry. I know they say guys like sex but that just feels weird to me.

Anonymous · Answer

You are giving hope to the old farts from the userbase who are not getting any. You want a serious relationship. If you are not sure he wants the same he probably doesn't. If he would he would make it clear. Think of it this way, are you attached to the idea of ending up with him? Would it break you if it doesn't turn out how you want and he ends things?

Decide what are your priorities and if you just want to enjoy his company temporarily.

ShadesVow · Answer

Not a fan of people in general also not particularly interested in people younger than myself. Though I am open to it just not something I go out of my way for

Anonymous · Answer

lmao look at the pathetic moral police trying to force morals on the populace and dictate who should date who

Ad_Quid_Orator · Answer

I'm in weird situation with this issue. I do find older guys dating younger girls a bit gross but even though my partner is 17 months older than me she looks ~9 years younger so I've been (falsely) accused of "robbing the cradle" :S

DryGermanGuy · Answer

It’s about compatibility and chemistry, both of which are unrelated to individual age.

Anonymous · Answer

Women are crazy at any age. But younger women have not had the full lifetime to get bitter yet. So younger women are typically more upbeat. The downside? They typically have the attention span of a gnat.

jahaims · Answer

You are being used. Only a loser would have enough in common to date someone 17 years younger

Pterodon · Answer

I dated one that was 25 years younger and fell madly in love with her but she didn’t feel the same in return.

tzdc21 · Answer

You're over 18, it's legal. If the connection is there go for it, if not don't.

Anonymous · Answer

Aroused. I've dated a few cougars and it's exhausting, not the sex but all the other bullshit in their lives.

OtterMan68 · Answer

depends on how young. I'd be OK with dating someone 30 or older as long as she was not interested in marriage

DextroShade · Answer

Men are all for it because they are prettier, have less baggage, less bad habits, less trauma, and have been through less dick.

Alex_m25 · Answer

I think there is no problem, but for now. He will grow old early and will start to be inadequate for you in bed. Is your libido too high?

Julian7312 · Answer

If it's legal and there's a mutual connection I'm fine with it

handsomelad70 · Answer

I'm after 24-44-year-old, buxom blondes (and other chesty chicks!!!)

Anonymous · Answer

You’re not ready for a relationship, but yet you’re having sex why even bother?

Anonymous · Answer

I would absolutely go for that age gap if it was the right girl.

Anonymous · Answer

I have no problem in dating younger women because I actually prefer them, but they usually friendzone me.

dsrice071966 · Answer

If it is okay with both parties, that I am okay with it.

Anonymous · Answer

Im okay wirh it as long as she has mqture feelings dress nicely and she is intelligent

icedragoom · Answer

I just posted the male equivalent to this question

FunkyMonkee · Answer

I'm all for it, as long they're both legal.

shortster · Answer

I would date a woman your age seriously

RedInnocent69 · Answer

We like them. I just met a 23 year old.

OddBeMe · Answer

Damn that’s a huge gap and you still young af.

Luckycharms12 · Answer

Fine within reason and you get on

RavVid · Answer

Works best.

Dongie · Answer

Enjoy.

NotSlowestSloth · Answer

Young and fertile

zombiewoof · Answer

Love them

Anonymous · Answer

Didn't work out

How do older men feel about dating younger women?

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How do younger guys feel about dating older women?

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How do younger guys feel about dating older women?

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