Search Results: is he trying to tell me something

*OLD= Online Dating*

For context, I matched with someone from a dating app around May this yr. We spoke for a few weeks & he proposed meeting up but the times he kept bringing up weren’t working for me. He ends up reaching out again when he was back from traveling & tried to schedule something, I didn’t follow through. At the time, I was overwhelmed with a new job & just not in the best headspace to meet up with anyone in person from OLD. About a month ago, I felt like I should’ve given him a shot & then sent him a well thought message asking if he would give me another “redo”. He never replied so I thought he wasn’t interested, flash fwd to this week & we end up matching on another app I just installed.

He reaches out saying he remembered me & I told him that I tried reaching out to him around a month ago. He said he didn’t know because he hasn’t checked that other app in a while and said he was sorry for leaving me hanging, asking if I’m willing to give him another redo and then brought up that we live close by based on the app. Tbh if I was him, I don’t think I would’ve given me another shot. I know we’re strangers & there shouldn’t be too much stock placed on randos from OLD apps but I would’ve been sus, thinking this person only wants to talk to me b/c it didn’t work out w/ someone else etc.

Am I too critical or anyone else get where I’m coming from? Again I’m not trying to seem like I get too attached but I try to be wary, since we all know OLD apps can be sketchy.

Prior to this job, I worked in financial aid for ~2 years. That was my 1st time ever working in the field but before that job I was an academic advisor. Early on during training when I was on a call with a trainer, I ended up breaking down crying bc I felt overwhelmed. I ended up pushing through & the trainers let my new team know that I was doing well. Eventually ended up having higher metrics compared to a lot of people on my team. Anxiety was always there but I got *better*, I was miserable at that job though due to the workload.

Now I’m in my 3rd week working for another school remotely in FA again, this is a school I’ve been trying to get in at for almost as long as I was at my other job (mostly bc of pay). I’m training by myself with the manager & I like her so far, she keeps telling me that I’m doing a good job (I’m not asking) & she felt the need to let the whole team know that I’m doing good/picking up fast when I was introduced to them earlier this week. This job is more in depth vs the last job & she even told me that they only hire people with experience now bc of how much there is to it. When she first taught me something new, it took a few tries & I picked it up, then she teaches me something else & I get it the first try.

I made my first 2 calls today & I felt shaky, she also said nicely that the first few calls will feel like that/ it was obvious it was one of my first calls but I did a good job. I felt like a wreck + then she gave me another assignment of something I caught onto before but I ended up getting stuck this time. I was obv frustrated & it was right before I was done for the day but I just couldn’t think straight bc I felt so upset with my progress.

Am I being too hard on myself? Am I right to believe this might not be a good fit for me? I’ve been so upset since I clocked out & am dreading tomorrow.

I’m possibly moving to another country to make my family with someone from that other country.

I don’t know the language I just know some words. So i told him that while he’s at work, I’m gonna be going to school to learn his language

he quickly said no!
I thought he was joking so I laughed

he said no.
Because I could meet someone there better than him & leave him.

that never crossed my mind. I’m going there to make a family not to try to find someone else. I’m 39 years old. I can’t be wasting time. I look really young but I’m not young. If I were younger then I would understand him, but I just want to make a family.

he said I should find something to do in his flat while he returns from work. Also that I should not work because I have to raise our kids.

I agree with him mostly as I don’t trust random babysitters but I want to go to school at least for learning the language and to the gym to stay fit but after he said this I didn’t even mention the gym anymore

I’ve been single almost my whole life. I don’t really find anyone attractive around me and I almost never go out so nobody approaches me. I feel he is my only chance If I even want to try to have a family.

BUT does what he said sound Scary? Creepy?
I also notice one of the doors in the videos and photos he’s sent me, has multiple locks on it. I asked why so many locks on a door, it seems rather creepy. And he was insulted by it saying I think he’s a serial killer. I didn’t say that. But it did cross my mind.

if I don’t go to him, the chances of me finding someone fast and telling him I need to make babies asap! Is very low probably less than 1% most men would flee at the sound of me saying any of that. They would want to get to know me first and then see how it goes etc etc

don’t really have time for that. I need to make a baby asap.

so having said all that,

what would you do if you were me? After what he said. Is it very weird or just a little?