Search Results: not ready to date

A lot of people have goals towards these things in life. The thing they do not realize is that they might not be ready or prepared for it. I want to know what others think it means to be ready. So many times people just want these things and never have the tools to hold a healthy relationship and learn to walk away from a partner in a healthy manner. When others think of marriage and kids they do not understand what comes with the responsibilities as well as the changes that are inevitable. Are you ready? Do you know what to expect? Please share your opinion even if you do not think you are. Have a great day y'all.

I created a dating profile 3 weeks ago to get some confidence since I was going through an insecure time, wasn’t really looking for anyone. Some men messaged me, but one guy stood out. He gave off this “I come as is” vibe which struck a cord with me for some reason so I exchanged socials with him to remain contact and deleted the app. Time continues and we’re talking every day, and things are going great.

He disclosed that he had to join the army right out of high school since he had gotten his then-girlfriend pregnant and now has a baby girl. He just started working a full time job and plans to go to a community college to earn his degree whereas I’m in graduate school with no kids. I understood him and we continued to grow from there. Then, the other night, I told him to visit me (we live 2 hours away from each other, and I requested that we meet in the middle so drive isn’t too bad).

He disclosed he didn’t have a paycheck from his job yet but would only need about $40 for gas. I paid for his gas, food, and toy for his dog while we hanged out the following day. He then asked me what particular app we met on since he had over 5 that has been used for over a month. He stated that girls would talk for a couple of days then leave, but I never left so he deleted them all (or he claims). He had a very neutral decision on sex like “if you want it, sure. If not, it’s fine.” But we ended up having sex anyway because I was very smitten with him at that time.

I asked if we were together as boyfriend/girlfriend since the first date went great and he said he likes me but not ready for that yet since he wants to know me more (even though I told him I’m an open-book) and wants to go on more dates. I agreed since I didn’t really have a choice and now after a day has passed, he isn’t really talking to me much and doesn’t seem interested anymore like leaving me on read. I’m not sure what to do because I spent over $100 on the date and was hoping he’d help pay some of that back.