Search Results: is it just sex

Ok me and this girl met when we were about 20 and had a great relationship for 8 years. I started drinking and it lead to us breaking up. She started dating a guy 2 weeks later I introduced her to. They lasted less than a year and we got back together exactly a year after separating.

I ended up finding pictures of her in sexy outfits and nudes on our old camera one day and some sexting stuff while going through our stuff in a closet I was cleaning out. I didn't tell her I found them. I spent the next 3 years trying to get her to send me dirty pictures. She broke up with me again and we separated for 3 years and then ended up back together again.

we've been back together over 10 years now and I have randomly tried a lot of times to get her to send me sexy stuff or sext with me, nothing has worked. This finally came to a head. I got tired of trying and getting nothing. We got into a pretty big argument about it and during the argument I find out that she thinks I'm talking about pictures she sent to another guy she dated right after we broke up the second time.

So both guys she dated right after we split she sent nudes and sexted with but whenever I have tried to get her to in the past I get excuses like she's worried about sending them because someone could get them for whatever reason which is all just excuses to me. So What, did you send them with pigeons the last 2 times.

Over the years this has gotten under my skin trying and never getting anything back. I usually have tried when I've been out of town for work or something. When I've tried sexting with her the responses have been either nothing at all or something that was just lame or her saying she didn't know what to say.

She says that she's been more sexually adventurous with me than anyone else ever. Our sex life I used to think was good but now I'm second guessing it. I usually make sure she gets off first and then she's in a hurry to get it over with. why is there no desire or lust there for her?

Her book (1971) argues that men, not women, are actually the ones oppressed through courtship, marriage, and cultural expectations. She compares marriage to slavery, saying men give up independence to provide for women and children in exchange for affection. It’s been called misogynistic, but also brutally honest and thought-provoking.
What do you think—truth or outdated generalization?

📚 The Manipulated Man by Esther Villar (1971) (title changed to “The Tamed Man” for modern audience) remains one of the most controversial books on gender roles.

Villar argues men are not oppressors but the opposite: women use courtship, marriage, and social expectations to make men providers and protectors. Men give up freedom, risk their lives, and work for women and children in exchange for brief affection.

She compares marriage to slavery — the wedding as the day a man loses independence, entering a Sisyphean struggle enforced by culture and government. She also describes “female rivalry,” where women compete to control men, using sex and pressure to keep them loyal.

Other writers, like Chinweizu (The Anatomy of Female Power) and Warren Farrell (The Myth of Male Power), echo the claim that society is more matriarchal than acknowledged.

Condemned as misogynistic but praised as brutally honest, the book challenges us to rethink who truly holds power in relationships.

- https://a.co/d/3N9xcFt