Search Results: a good personality

I tend to find a lot of people irritating therefore avoid them. I think people can tell when I don’t want them around me.. I hate it when strangers come into my personal space, touch me or if I can smell their bad breath or hygiene issues. I think I have more of an issue with this than most people do.
I also don’t see much point in talking to someone unless I can get something out of them or I really enjoy their company like I find them interesting etc. Whenever I’ve had friends, I’ve noticed I drink too much at the pub and completely dominate the conversations, I like the attention all on me.
I always feel sort of numb, bored or maybe depressed. but I also ruminate and stress very easily, leading me to feel like I have to control situations or avoid them. If I have to work in group activities at university, I zone out and can’t concentrate because I find it overwhelming and don’t see the point of contributing unless I’m the leader however I’d still much rather sit back and do nothing or just do what I’m told to do etc. I used to get very good grades at school without much effort… now I’m struggling and scraping by with passes at uni because of poor time management and having random special interests distracting me.

I also feel the need to be somehow better than others.. this is why I like being a musician… a lot of the people on my uni course can’t play their instruments that well and I feel superior to them because of that.. however I feel upset if they do better than me in assessments. I also get massive anxiety if I feel like I won’t perform well, but if I know my parts well I get a bit egotistical … even as a kid I loved the attention from performing and playing instruments. I also love getting positive attention from lecturers and even seduced one and had sex with them to sort of “test” if I could win him over, but at the same time I was also very infatuated with him for no logical reason at all. I think I wanted to see how far he would go with me.

I know a woman and a man who both get lots of romantic attention. The woman to me is noticeably the better overall person, but the man is more physically attractive.

The woman has more options thrown at her simply because she is still a beautiful woman in a big city. Her personality also helps a lot.

To me, it was a win for good girls and good guys out there because she rejected this good looking guy because of his bad personality. I know plenty of women who would have not been able to say no because of his looks and sweet talk.

That being said, it got me thinking about this question. I'm basically wondering if you believe that it's more likely that he/she will become extra cocky or become wiser with selecting the right partner.

I believe that 10 years is relevant, but feel free to chime in with your honesty. Please try not to select the last polling option unless you really believe it is about equal.

So I’ve had an online friend for a few years and he started wishing me a happy birthday every year after we got to know each other a little better. There were times where he would & I wouldn’t, when that were the case, he’d follow up a few days or maybe a week after saying I forgot it was his birthday (more subtly). Last year, he wished me a happy belated & this year I decided to also be more laid back. I just asked him if he had a good birthday maybe a day or two after it actually happened, I sent him that message after he followed up with me about something else. He leaves me on read yet continues to view my IG stories.

This has always been the case, he’s always one of the first to see my stories but may go weeks without msging me. A few years back, he’d literally go weeks without replying but will be the first person to see my stories or comment. But when I’d take long to get back to him, he’d *jokingly* say that I’m ignoring him or ask if I’m busy. Honestly I don’t feel like I did anything wrong so I don’t see the need to reach out, it just seems hypocritical. You can be busy but I can’t? He hasn’t made a comment like that in years & his response time has gotten better. I have a tendency to delete people when my frustration has built up, I don’t know if it’s an avoidant personality style trait.

I just…couldn’t bring myself to confront him and ask if he was upset with me. I just felt apathetic yet hopeless in a way, even though I had total control. It’s been over 5 months since I heard from him and we’ve never gone that long without talking, so I took a hint and removed him (unfollowed him/he’s no longer able to follow me) from my IG. He’s still on FB, gaming app & linked in but those platforms are a lot less personal. Now I officially have no “friends” and at 30F I should be A LOT more upset but it’s more worrying about how I’m perceived. Is avoidant attachment the cause? Or excuses and I’m just a shitty friend?