Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

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Cultural Gender Roles VS Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate between them.

Something that always seemed to separate me from those around my age is my belief that gender roles are essential parts of the dating world and of functioning relationships. The two genders are clearly biologically different both in body and in mind. It's an unavoidable fact of life. It's what allows men and women to act a bit like puzzle pieces in a relationship, with the man making up for the weaknesses of the woman and the woman doing the same for her man, depending on the situation.

But, being on this site has gotten the little gears in my head turning. Much as I believe in the inherent importance of gender roles, they seem a bit... restrictive.. don't you think? The term "toxic masculinity" has gotten a lot of traction these past years, and I can honestly wouldn't be surprised if a term called "toxic femininity" snuck up on us at some point in the near future.

There are many people who would claim that gender roles are too solid and stubborn, just as there are those who would say that gender roles are fine the way they are and to go against them, just a little bit, means the end of civilization. Both parties on this have good points. As someone who has watched this same argument unfold time and time again on G@G, I am certain that the answer lies somewhere in the middle. Many people clearly aren't happy with the system. They want to be rid of it, to feel free from it, but they also understand that, to get much of anywhere, they'll need to do SOMETHING.

I think just throwing the roles out the window claiming that they're purely societal is foolish. But, at the same time, having everyone follow a strict set of rules for their gender leaves very little room for self expression and diversity. After many days of pondering this, the answer is simple. We need to go back to our roots.

Okay, so what do I mean?

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

The way I see it, there are two kinds of gender roles:

1.) Those that are encoded in our very DNA that helped us survive as a species by attracting the opposite sex.

and

2.) Those that are forced on us by society through pressure and such.

Our societies have placed expectations on each of the two genders as civilization has evolved, which is good in some ways. BUT, societies have done this to such an extent that they have taken away much of the emphasis on what truly makes up the biological roles of each gender. This has left many people confused and frustrated that they have to follow such a crippling guideline on what they are when they don't even know why.

In short, societal pressure limits us far more than it helps us when it comes to gender roles because it tries to make every person of each gender uniform in character.

So, what do we do about this? We look back at the dawn of humanity and clean up the mess. Purify the water. By separating what really makes each of the genders, in mind and in body, from what society TELLS us what makes each of the genders, we can get to the heart of what little girls and boys are made of and flush out the rest of the bullshit.

Examples of unnecessary societal restrictions: Men.

Sleeping with multiple women

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

Yes, I'm going there.

Tossed around an awful lot here isn't it. Many Pinks say they only want experienced guys, guys here pressure other guys to stop looking for relationships and just "fuck her in the pussy." Bullshit, all of it.

Why? Well, think about it. Is a guy being able to sleep with multiple women a core aspect of a masculine man.... or is it simply a biproduct of being one? A guy doesn't need to sleep with multiple women to have a powerful masculine vibe. A masculine attitude can still be a masculine attitude regardless of how many women the guy stuck his cock into. If a guy is powerful and dominant in all aspects of his life, it doesn't matter how many women he fucked because it's something completely separate. Sure, powerful and dominant men get more sex than the more passive of us.. but it's not homogeneous. This means that all this pressure to lose your virginity early on is unnecessary and very forced.

Loving cars

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

Yes, yes, I know. Being able to fix cars proves that you're better able to provide for your woman and shows that you are both physically strong and able to handle responsibility. But can't that also apply to other parts of the house and property as well? I know that there's expectation on that too, but it mostly seems to be on cars. Not only that but we as men are pressured to be very into everything that is cars, not just fixing the mechanics of them.

Now, I don't think I'm telling you anything new here when I say this but... cars don't grow on trees. They're man-made. "But shelter structures have been around since the beginning of human society, and they're not man-made," you say to me. Yes, I say, but cars have only been a part of us for so many decades. To me, there's nothing really special about cars in particular that society would have to pressure guys to be so into them. Yes, part of being a man is taking responsibility for your belongings and being able to keep everything nice and safe for your women and children... but why cars specifically? Hmmmm......

Being against everything gay

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

Gay men especially, it seems. It's obvious, is it not, that men are pressured to attack anything homosexual off the basis of whoever they're going after being a "faggot" or a "dyke?" It's clear that more women than men support gay rights, and it's common that the most stereotypically manly of a group of guys is the most intolerant of gay people.

But... why?

Attacking people, physically and verbally, just on the basis of sexuality has nothing to do with being a man. Sure, aggression is an essential part of masculinity... but only in healthy contexts. What we're seeing here is unprovoked aggression, which is NOT good. It's the core substance, but in a very twisted way.

Examples of unnecessary societal restrictions: Women.

Makeup

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

Simple right? Men are more visual so women have to make more of an effort to look good, right? It's just the natural way, right? Well, not exactly.

It's true that men are more visual, but that's because a lot of the core elements of femininity like fertility and the capability to not die from childbirth can be easily determined by what we can SEE. But this....

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

Yeaaaaaa no. This is just too much. I'm not saying that there is no makeup out there that can make a woman look better, but the way societal pressure has made the demand for makeup styles and such to evolve over the years is starting to give birth to things that turn my dick into a deflated snake balloon.

Not only that, but makeup does only a little bit to make the woman look healthier to pass genes on, and absolutely NOTHING to make her body look better for carrying children.

Plus, I also happen to know that makeup was originally designed for us dudes. Which means that, throughout history, makeup did not have roots in just one gender, rendering this pressure on women pretty useless.

Chastity

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

Now that I've probably stepped on the nerves of a sizable portion of women reading this, I figured now would be an excellent time to bring this into light. We all know the metaphor.. right?

If a key unlocks all locks, it's a master key. If a lock lets all the keys in, it's a shitty lock.

Where did this mentality come from? Jealousy. I'm by no means a male feminist, but I know the problems with my own gender when I see them.

The truth is that this shaming of sluts was put in place by men who believed that every man should have a chance to procreate because it's "fair" even if most women aren't attracted to most men. Okay, I can see the torches and pinch forks coming already. It's the truth. Social hypergamy is a thing that exists and it's natural. It's not a positive thing, it's not a negative thing, it just is.

And that's my point. Pressuring women to settle for guys they aren't even attracted to when they could be out having fun with the guys they actually like, isn't doing anybody any favors.

Plus it makes no sense from a biological standpoint. Woman CAN sleep around with whatever guys she wants, it's her right. It doesn't affect her femininity at all unless she does something irresponsible in the event that she gets knocked up.

Liking pink

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

This one won't take much explanation. Women are pressured to like the color pink by society alone. Nothing genetic or biologically advantageous about it. A woman can still be emotionally supporting, nurturing and able to have healthy children without liking this color.

So, what do we do about this?

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

You remember that analogy about cleaning out the water I made earlier? That's what we can do about this. By separating what is biologically the substance of our gender from what society tells us it is, we can increase diversity many times over. By getting to the root of what makes our gender important to our lives and the lives of others, we are able to push all the bs about what we should and should not like, what our hobbies should be etc. out of the picture. This will better allow each person in their own right to be unique from the other guys/girls while also not crossing any lines that would ruin their success with the opposite sex. We'll be able to take what defines our gender at the base level and incorporate it into the rest of our lives while leaving room to be our own people, freeing us from our chains and making us what it truly means to be...

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them

Thanks a lot everyone!

Cultural Gender Roles vs. Biological Gender Norms, and Why it's Important to Differentiate Between Them
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Most Helpful Guy

  • JohnDoeJr
    I like what you're trying to do in concept. The fact that some gender differences are biological seems to be overwritten in today's society in favor of putting all the responsibility on environmental and cultural issues.
    I don't think differentiating the two is such an easy task though, what we do is a mesh of biological and environmental interactions, not so much separate parts.

    For example, you say makeup is a societal construct, but look around the world and in every single place and time period you look women have tried finding ways to artificially enhance their beauty. Sure, not all use the same method and there is some cultural variation as to what's considered beautiful, but there is a lot of overlap even between cultures that had no means of trade or communications. So, I don't buy it that it's purely cultural.
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girl

  • SnowHearth
    :O Ö O:
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

311
  • JRICHARDS1996
    You were onto something but your application of your principles was way off. In short, I would argue that nurture is merely the product of nature and thus the distinction between culture and biology is moot. For example, you credit opposition to homosexuality as something cultural when - putting political correctness aside - it is easy to see the biological origin. Our Darwinian purpose is the propagation of our genes via sexual intercourse between a man and woman. Homosexuality is a perversion of this purpose. People who engage in homosexuality do not get to pass on their genes. Therefore they are harbingers of the extinction of our species. Thus it is easy to see how we would have evolved an aversion toward homosexuality, and how a culture of homophobia could have arisen from that biological aversion. Not that I support violence against homosexuals, but there is a biological basis for it. The same can be said about promiscuity. Male promiscuity is glorified because biologically it means that he has passed on his genes. Female promiscuity is frowned upon because it increases the likelihood of a man taking care of offspring that are not his own. Again, a biological basis that culture only strengthened. Nurture did not create it.
    • RedVulcan

      Your second point on male promiscuity is airtight enough that I don't feel like arguing it.
      I have some words about the one for anti-homosexuality though. I feel the need to point out that while yes, not being willing to produce children is a bad signfor a species, only a small minority ofmen are homosexual. All things considered I'd out the number at below 10%. Biologically speaking such a small population of non breeders is just be decreasing the competition, and it should actually make straight males glad to see an attractive yet gay male because the two of them are not competing for the same resource.
      So I would then ascribe more hate to social reasons. What social construct is then responsible? I'm not certain, but I'd say most of the major world religions dislike homosexuals. Many people listen and have listened to their religious authority for confusing matters like this one, so it's not such a farfetched conclusion.

    • @RedVulcan Religion most certainly plays a part, as does nurture itself, but it is *not* the only part and for that matter I still affirm that nature plays a role. First, you are correct that homosexuals make up less than 10% of the population which is marginal considered how large our population is. But thousands of years ago we were truly on the verge of extinction. Therefore even 10% of the male population not breeding would have been a danger to the wellbeing of the species. Hence homophobia arising from nature. Also, putting homosexuality itself aside, humans have evolved a tendency to look down upon non-conformity - because it undermines the pack. This could also be a natural explanation for homophobia.

    • RedVulcan

      Valid points! Just wanna mention that my goal was to add to the discussion instead or arguing against it.

  • Bandit74
    I agree that a guy doesn't have to sleep with a lot of women to prove his masculinity, but I do think guys are better off not being virgins. Most women find it unnatractive and it only becomes more of a disadvantage the older he gets.

    "Woman CAN sleep around with whatever guys she wants, it's her right"

    Yeah, but a guy can decide that makes her an unnatractive candidate for marriage and not want to settle down with her. It's his right.

  • G-Daz
    I'm sorry but reality check. There's only 2 genders
  • TheInvisibleMan
    For some things - you hit the center! But for others you are completely wrong
    • Speak your mind, then.

    • Mostly about chastity and gays. Nobody says a woman can't sleep around. But when the time for marriage comes, any smart guy WILL want to marry a virgin. Also, throughout history, a girl always had to be a virgin in order to marry a king, because kings wanted nothing but the best for themselves. You can call it conservative or whatever but its a smart choice. And the key quote could not be more true. Now as for gays, no, it does not make a guy more masculine if he hates them. And I do not support violence towards them in any way. But there is something in every straight guy that naturally makes him disgusted when he sees gay guys. So thats more natural part, not social conditioning. Its just that the media forces LGBT population so much in every possible way so now its almost forbidden to have a natural reaction towards something unnatural.

  • OliviaSkumps
    Oh, that is the reason my boyfriend don't like my new ringtone
    ))
  • Paul34
    Since I'm a part of the MGTOW community, I don't have unrestricted social gender norms just like girls.

    -I dont need to pursue girls or women.
    -I don't hate everything "gay"
    - I love cars because I love driving, it's fun.
  • GraveTruth
    The article is nice but it a little wack
    Women do not CARE at all that men can fix cars or any type of labor knowledge and it's definitely not a male gender role, or at least not anymore.

    Way back people liked the caveman concept but in case you have not noticed women like men a little less strong and manly now...
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...f5a00a8324.jpg
  • All of those "unnecessary societal restrictions" you mentioned are actually biologically and history based. I've read about where these ideas came from in my biology and history classes.
    Men sleeping with multiple women as a "social restriction" applies to almost every animal species. A single man can reproduce much faster than 1 woman can. Liking cars is not the least bit new because before cars men were fascinated with another form of transportation: ships. It was a sign of financial stability and practical intelligence which women are biologically attracted to.
    As for make-up and pink: women stole those things from us, men. Make-up was initially for men only along with high heels and pantyhose (look at a picture of George Washington: rouge, lipstick and pantyhose). Pink was initially a boy's color, but during Susan B. Anthony's protests, she took the color pink for women. So it's technically a sign of pride and girl-power for women.

    None of this stuff is the least bit new.
    • "Men sleeping with multiple women as a "social restriction" applies to almost every animal species. A single man can reproduce much faster than 1 woman can."

      While that may be true, my point was that the ability to sleep with multiple women is an after effect of being very masculine. It doesn't make up masculinity, it's a result of it.

      "Liking cars is not the least bit new because before cars men were fascinated with another form of transportation: ships. It was a sign of financial stability and practical intelligence which women are biologically attracted to."

      You can have financial stability and practical intelligence without being into transportation.

    • Most forms of attraction to someone are subconscious. People don't think critically about the exact reasons they are attracted to people. Like men don't think about the exact reasons they like a woman with a certain haircut or a nice butt. We just know that we like it. Big boobs don't actually mean a woman is better for getting pregnant, but we're biologically programmed to like a woman who has big boobs.
      Same thing goes for women. They evolved to be subconsciously attracted to men who "appear" to be financially stable and practically intelligent.

    • These things are also not based on masculinity, but completely based on evolution and natural selection. Humans have almost no control over it.

    • Show All
  • Mártainn
    Exactly my thoughts. Great take.
  • kickme
    boys have a penis and girls have a vagina
  • Adigelunar
    thats a good point
  • MissSakura
    good share...
  • Anonymous
    Wow. Like others here, when you aren't busy being a complete prick, ya got some real good points. But dude, ya gotta calm the hell down about non religious or non white people. Im not saying go all SJW mode, but for real, cool it. Yah, minorities are full of both decent people and complete pricks. So are majority. Fact is, we're all just a mixed up bunch of people in the end of the day with no real way of knowing who are ancestors are too far up the line. If ya don't like other races or whatever, at least learn to feel for their men, as they often can get quite overlooked no matter what race or belief. Ever thought of being MGTOW? Look into it.
  • Anonymous
    Non biological gender roles and non heterosexuality are social constructs.
    • I disagree. Hundreds of species in the animal kingdom have been observed as having homosexual members.

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