How can I run into my crush again, without seeming like a stalker?

[soleillauren]

Ok, so well I went to Trader Joes(our local grocery store) to buy honey for my mom, cause she loves having honey in her coffee. Well anyway I went to the cashier closest to the exit so I can get out, and well there was this really cute guy. He looked down at the one item I had and teased me saying 'oh so you need a little bit of honey in your life?'' I laughed and said "yes.'' then we started to talk again and he told me how he was going to our local college and was in the music program. I told him I was a artist and hoped to get into that school as well. We must have talked for like ten minutes, and I'm sure the people that were behind me were annoyed cause I only had one item. But anyway, as I was leaving he said 'whats your name? and I told him my name and he said his name was john,i Haven't seen him since.help!

Updates

+1 y

was he intrested, or just flirting?

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+1 y

i haven seen him since january, but I went there at night so possibly he could be working the night shifts. Should I give up or keep trying?

Updates

+1 y

saw him at night when I pulled up, but he was leaving. It was around 8 when he left. So now I know he works night shifts.

[billy_young]

Ok, I have a few ideas...

1... Have you tried facebook? I've found several people on there using just their first name and some very basic info. Now I'm the one sounding like a stalker! How did that happen lol. Just search 'john'. click people at the left hand side. Then you can narrow your results, so you can try narrowing it down to people in your town, or you can search for a 'john' at the college he's at, or both or whatever. Hopefully he'll have a reasonable profile pic so you can pick him out quite easily. If this does work however, I'd say probably don't add him as a friend now or he'll have no idea who you are. Wait until you see him again and then go straigh on fb and add him.

2... You've told me in chat that you saw him yesterday. Maybe he only works there in the holidays? I don't know when US holidays are and I don't know when you saw him in Jan, but if they're the only 2 times you've ever seen him there it's a possibility. It is quite unlikely, because that only normally happens when people live away from home in term time. I'm guessing the college is local, so it's quite unlikely but possible. In this case, go to the store every few hours for the next few days until you see him or you might have to wait until summer!

3... These thoughts are in a very random order, so sorry about that...Yes, I'm pretty sure he was interested in you. As Warren said, cashiers are paid to be friendly, but spending 10 min with you certainly won't have improved the mood of anyone waiting behind you. If the store is anything like the shop I used to work in then spending 10 min with a customer buying just one item could have cost him his job! I used to get shouted at for talking for 2 minutes to someone with a trolley full, so 10 min with you definitely wasn't just customer service, it was his own personal interest in you. And asking your name 100% confirms this.

4... How to meet him again...

a) You could just go back every few hours for a whole week, or rent a room in the building opposite, or sit outside the shop 24/7 or get a blacked-out windowed car and sit down the street with some binoculars... you get the idea... basically stalk the shop until you find him there. Some people might see you and find it a bit stalkerish/creepy, but as long as he doesn't then what does it matter.

b) You could ask in the shop when 'John' is working. A bit creepy again, and they would probably tell him, so he'd know for sure that you were stalkishly interested, but is that such a bad thing? OK, maybe, but maybe not.

c) just go quite often. Everytime your mum wants something. And keep forgetting items so you have to go back more often. So slightly less intense than the every few hours, but it gives you more chance of seeing him.

d) Ask your friends to text you if ever they see him in there.

e) Hang around by college in the hope you'll see him one day. Might take quite a bit of trying and he'd probably be with his friends and might not even notice, let ... continued..

[billy_young]

... continued ...

let alone talk to you.

f) just go whenever you need, no extra effort, and hope that EVENTUALLY you'll bump into him again.

Or, you could just give up. Most of the above options seem like quite a lot of effort for a guy you've only spoken to for 10 mins. He could be a complete d***. But of course you'll never know if he is or not until you see him again. So it really depends how much you think he's worth it.

So, if you DO meet him... chat again... continued...

[billy_young]

...

and either give him your number or ask if he wants to meet you after his shift or another evening, or add him on facebook straight after seeing him.

Something that's just occured to me about fb is if you find him you can see if you have any 'mutual friends' and ask them to introduce you to him at a party or something.

hmmm... I think I've exhausted all my ideas now lol. Or at least it's too late to think properly of any more lol.

Hope this helps. Let me know if I can help more :) xx

[Warren]

Clerks/cashiers/checkers are expected to be nice and cordial, but asking your name is clearly an expression of interest, imho, and you're obviously interested in him. I'd say just go back, buy something and give him your number on the way out. If that is too forceful, then start buying something simple every day -- Orange Juice, perhaps. I'm sure he'd be able to figure out that you're only buying it for him, but at least you'd be able to fool yourself into thinking he MIGHT not know. xD

Give him your number, or ask for his. Take a chance. And, if it fails.. tell your mother to get her own honey next time!

[soleillauren]

well like I have been there a couple of times and I haven't seen him, so I'm thinking he was a seasonal worker or I just come at the wrong time he's working at. When I was buying the honey for my mom it was like 8ish so he could be working night shifts cause he is in school.

[chondell]

stop wasting your time and chasing him. when you least expect it, he will find you if it is meant to be. Speaking from experience, whenever a woman puts out a vibe into the universe, that she is not looking for a man at all, that is when they all come. Men love confidence, independence, and mystery! However, because men are so simple, even when they are genuinely interested, often times, whether they are aware of your interest or not, they sniff that out as desperate, although, it isn't always true. So woman to woman, move on with your own life, and let him chase you! That's his job anyway, and contrary to popular opinion, it is a good job. If you truly like this person, then wouldn't you want them to only reciprocate that same interest back out of genuine individual decision? Instead, out of pressure or some other ungodly reason? Be patient my dear, and treat him the way you would want to be treated, but put on your poker face, as to not reveal your hand, and keep him guessing to want more of you!

Jamaica Outtttttttttttt

[csk28]

Haha, you know where to run into him again. Just go grocery shopping every week and continue to have brief chats with him. Over time give him your number and suggest hangin out sometime. Nothing to it and no chance of being labeled a stalker, unless you follow him to his house lol. Good luck!

[somecoolname]

lol same thing with me at my grocery store. I'm in your shoes, just too nervous to pull the trigger, each time I see her she looks at me like "ask already" but I never do. my window is closing fast... next time you are there and see him, ask him out, get his digits and go from there,unlike my lame self..

[Barrybaby]

well, if you want to see him again...go up to the college and hang out a little. he should have asked for your number or you should have given it to him. Although, you don't really know that he does not have a girlfriend. So be careful.

[lolli]

Have you found him yet?

[soleillauren]

nope, I haven't beem back to that store, cause I have work. And I talked to his friend about him. And I thought I was a fool for doing that lol.