An intruder breaks into your home with a bat, you can choose any weapon to defend yourself with?

Question

The only catch is it has to be weird, what do you choose? Some Weird weapon ideas

TwistedSukuna · Accepted Answer

Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended. Couldn't resist lol.

Likes2drive · Accepted Answer

I have a wrist rocket sling shot I could use with metal balls , probably piss him off though, I’ll aim at the face

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

2 lb metal gspot wand. He’d have to live that down in prison. :D

Daniela1982 · Accepted Answer

Lure him to the garage and blast him out the door with my guns.

NathanDavis · Answer

I've been throwing knives at targets that are smaller than an eye socket for more than 20 years... and I like fountain pens... this one will do...

jshm2 · Answer

Fart gas.

Had a German friend of mine get a team of intruders out of his apartment double time, with a can of fart gas.

Just imagine a midget guy barrelling out of a room screaming in German to GTFO and spraying a can of fart gas.

Later he did admit he thought it was mace or pepper spray.

It is actually funny as hell when he tells the recollection.

Ms_Vanderquack · Answer

this

Floppy2112 · Answer

A cast iron skillet can do formidable damage to an intruder. Even a rolling pin can bludgeon someone to death with not much difficulty. I prefer my.45 next to my head though.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

My cousin use to collect genuine Star Wars props. Once he gave up and sold everything I bought the dual Red Light Sabre used by Darth Maul. No, not the artificial ones being sold on EBAY. This is the real heavy Saberstaff.
I was going to say that.. but it is far too valuable. I do however know how to use two pair of nun chuks at the same time. I would just grab a pair of those.

Oigit · Answer

I would start throwing massive wheels of cheese at them. Though doing so could cause more people to break into my place.

ToastyOats · Answer

My hot cup of coffee in the face, followed up with my coffee tables sharp legs driving them against a wall.  Then its time for the candle wax, drip, drip Mother Fucker!

Nightroads · Answer

The three foot 8lb 3/4 inch glass water vase convert that used to sit on my coffee table in my younger days. Always joked it was my home security system. It was eight pounds empty. Could put just over a half gallon of water.

snackthatsmilesback · Answer

A bat

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

Fire bullets out of my ring.

Anonymous · Answer

A spring loaded ball kicker. You attach a giant metal boot to a swing contraption and awkwardly lug it towards the intruder before you release the momentum and hope it connects.

Jaximus-Lion · Answer

I have a human collar with metal chain and a whip stick in my bedroom 😏

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

A Dinosaur Tooth I got at some small museum place a long time ago

andreasderjuengere · Answer

I'll throw LEGO's at him. For added weirdness I could dip them in honey?

exitseven · Answer

I would go in the kitchen and get a rubber spatula. He won;t believe what happens after that.

Rangers · Answer

My Taurus Judge carbine with 2 3" 000 buck 410 shells and 3 250gr flat nose black powder 45 colt rounds that I cast the projectiles for myself

rcljr · Answer

He’s taking a 12 gauge slug in his face pure and simple

Iron_Man · Answer

The 44 auto mag that removes the fingerprints the Clint Eastwood special

Григорий · Answer

The last one isn’t weird. That dog is doing nothing wrong with that beautiful AR-15. That being said I blast the intruder with a 36 pounder cannon.

SaoirseS · Answer

Claymores.

ManHater · Answer

What color is the criminal? If he's black I would pick the weapon that would give him a slow painful death.

FoghornLeghorn99 · Answer

I have my doors and windows booby trapped. No further action necessary.

EyesOfGod · Answer

A spear so the only thing im damaging is the intruder.

888theGreat · Answer

bad breath.  some women here need to just wink , and he would away as fast as he could

OddBeMe · Answer

Exo skeleton with attached mini guns and rockets. Sorry neighbors.

najekim · Answer

Given the parameters, I'd say either a morning star or shurikens.

Waldoe · Answer

toilet plunger... hit him with the shit end...

Cherry234 · Answer

I'll choose the weird gun shaped weapon (pic 3)

Stoner710 · Answer

Shogun 20 gauge full choke

Wester1967 · Answer

Use my brain to grab his bat and make him eat it.

Passion_Devil · Answer

My boyfriend's kunai!

Anonymous · Answer

my goth babe sex doll.

MisterWack · Answer

Light Saber.

Andres77 · Answer

Shotgun... birdshot.

An intruder breaks into your home with a bat, you can choose any weapon to defend yourself with?

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Killer breaks into your house, what unconventional things would you use to stop him?

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Killer breaks into your house, what unconventional things would you use to stop him?

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