Killer breaks into your house, what unconventional things would you use to stop him?

Question

a masked killer breaks into your home, what unconventional item do you use as a weapon to stop him? he only has a knife and no one has guns in this scenario. think out of the box.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

a blowjob. he'd forget he was there trying to kill me. 😏

Grond21 · Accepted Answer

Grandma. Give her attack dentures and set her loose

Lliam · Answer

Spray him in the face and chest with WD, using the straw to get better distance and concentrated fire, then apply the flame thrower to light him up.
While he's preoccupied, break his face wrist and knees with the stout, brass handled walking stick next to my door. Toss him outside down my steps. Use a fire extinguisher inside my house if necessary. And wait for the cops to arrive.

dynamicyandere · Answer

As someone who has done martial arts for 8 years and is familiar with weapon defense, in close quarters, I’d actually much rather go against someone with a gun than a knife.

Jimmy Hoffa (Mafia Boss) from the movie The Irishman is 100% right. “Always charge a guy with a gun. With a knife, you run away.” - Jimmy Hoffa

Knives are extremely deadly at close range—worse than guns.

But, if I HAD to go against someone with a knife in my own house… I’d want something nimble, yet sturdy, hard-hitting, and has more range than the knife.

So, if I don’t have good police baton, I suppose I’d want to use something like an aluminum baseball bat.

(A nice short sword or short machete would work even better, but I suppose you’re asking about more normal household items, haha.)

Daniela1982 · Answer

I'd throw pies, with a hammer baked inside, at him until he cries for mercy. I would give him some good whoop ass in a cast iron skillet to his noggin!

Anonymous · Answer

A handsaw. Guy I knew used it to great effect. I live in the UK and even though I own a.22 rifle and double barrell shotguns I can use them for home defence. Keeping say a cricket bat or hockey stick or a hammer by your bed for home defence is dicey because if it came to court you were keeping those there deliberately as a weapon.

BadApple69 · Answer

Everything CAN be used as a weapon. Every room has many choices. Kitchen of course has knives, forks, chairs...
I only use zebra stainless steel ball point pens and the reason is... They right good and they can be used as a weapon to defend yourself (oh and you also can get them past airport security).
A towel can be good in defending against a knife attack if you have nothing else.
But even while home I carry a gun so I don't have to worry if a murderer with a knife comes in.

BeetleBro2000 · Answer

I can lift and swing every peice of furniture in our house except for the couch and the bed. The dining room chairs in particular are sturdy wood and make a nice whooshing sound when they go fast.

Andres77 · Answer

Pick one probably the sword

artgorgeous · Answer

I would use hot water from my shower to spray his face. If he has a face mask that will definitely be bad for him. It's very difficult to breathe in wet mask. then I would hit him with a chair, in his head. If I had a shovel, I'd use that. Basically long and heavy object so he can't reach with a knife. but the best scenario is just run away.

magiusX26 · Answer

too many choices. name a few everday in home (most homes anyways) items and i'll give you some rundowns as to how they can be weaponized. little acknowledged fact,  everything  is a weapon of some sort or another, how practical or useful as one varies greatly. many will be more of a distraction/irritant type of weapon, but a weapon none the less. a lot of it comes down to how creative a person's mind is.

Staximus · Answer

In real life there's a machete in the corner behind my bedroom door, a 9mm and a Bowie knife in my dresser drawer, and a shotgun in my closet. There's an alley behind my house. It's like a corridor for wandering tweakers that don't want to be seen by the cops, who drive down the street in front of my house.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

I've got a ballistic shield that can whack the crap out of people and a cattle prod for fun.

ShadowYamihiro · Answer

Can't reveal my secrets here but he ain't walking out that's for sure :) but pots and pans are funny way to go out so i'll vote on that. They are good as weapons and shields

lightbulb27 · Answer

currently, I'd throw a large bag of nuts at him. maybe make him laugh? hey... you're nuts!!! literally!!! ok... lets eat... Jesus ate with sinners as well...

LiamJHayden · Answer

Well I do have Anduril, Glamdring, Orcrist, and Sting on my walls, but I think my Kali sticks or some of the free weights I have around would be effective.

Alex8736 · Answer

Spray bleach in their face to blind them followed by a rolling pin straight to their nuts

TheUniqueOne96 · Answer

Pots or Pans sounds look good weapons, although as an alternative, I'd maybe grab a can out of the fridge and fling it at him.

DancingQueen16 · Answer

If he came into my room I'd grab my old alarm clock and start hitting him in the face with it and if that didn't work I'd grab one of my many perfumes off my dresser and spray him in the eyes

MiddleAgedClimbee · Answer

He will likely get a piece of furniture thrown at him, softball bat to the torso or head, it really depends on where he breaks in.

boobliker · Answer

airasole fly killer and a lighter to burn him after

AviatorTom · Answer

I'd tell him I have a bad case of COVID and cough in his face.

Anonymous · Answer

I'd tell Alexa to initiate Claymore Roomba and then cut the power to the house. Let the games begin! 😆😆😆

Sparkie460 · Answer

I have a byrner gun that shoots pepper balls that I carry on me at all times. one shot of that and they won't be able to breathe or see. I'd unload the gun on them.

Jerre · Answer

I would use the pepper spray I have or my cast iron skillet.

ScisorsAndRaisins · Answer

I keep one of these by my door.

Koneko911 · Answer

I'm just gonna die. I'm too lazy to fight back

exitseven · Answer

I have some heavy lamps that would absolutely render the attacker unconscious

dolemite58 · Answer

i have a super heavy axe called a maul for splitting firewood next to the front door, if i hit him with that it would go through them like butter.

Dargil · Answer

My fire extinguisher. Shoot him in the face and then crack his skull.

Surely · Answer

Whatever is nearby and able to put a hurting on the person.  Hopefully I would have a can of wasp spray handy!

AydenHazor · Answer

Cast iron skillet and/or kitchen knives. I'm not sure I want to damage my nice knives on them though.

OddBeMe · Answer

Statistically, putting barriers between you and then running the fck away.

tfan1 · Answer

I have two pairs of nunchucks hanging over the end of my bed

Skull_Anon · Answer

Find his flaws and offer him lessons to be better 💀

scooogy · Answer

My ex is destined to make men run from her 😌

DextroShade · Answer

I am glad I have a gun and I wouldn't have to think about this.

Christoff92 · Answer

Make a big fat and loud fart 🤣😏

Agape93 · Answer

My dogs. Guard dogs for a reason.

bowenw · Answer

I may ask Google Home to play police sirens

Finchie40 · Answer

Baseball bat that I keep under my bed at all times

CubaPirate · Answer

A kitchen knife

Anonymous · Answer

Attack with pan on his balls and face

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

REENACT HOME ALONE

shades777 · Answer

the exit

msc545 · Answer

My dog

Killer breaks into your house, what unconventional things would you use to stop him?

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A masked killer in the house what would you do?

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