Have you ever been openly sexually objectified?

[t-8900]

As a guy... I actually have. I've also been sexually harassed a lot by people of both genders... oddly enough. I remembered back in HS there were two girls who both swore they'd be having my baby by senior year. In gym my fried charlie and I (both 6'3) would hang out together and hit the laps. Girls would openly cat call us and actually grab our junk and asses. Not sure if women even know this is a thing men experience too. I had to suffer through ass grabbing, junk grabbing, nipple twisters, unwanted hugs and kisses, and a lot of vulgarity from grades 8-12. This post is inspired by another question I saw posted a day ago so it inspired this one. Actually in interested to know if I'm a rarer case, if I went to a rough school district, or something else.

Updates

+1 y

Okay I don't know why it gave an emoji and stuff my my friend Charlie and I are both six foot three lol. I think height DID have something to do with it because he was Scandinavian with a long blonde ponytail and I'm olive skinned Italian so yeah the only thing we had in common vwas build and height. Charlie did manage to outdrink me back then too lol. I stopped at 32 beers in 2 hours and this fool had to up me by 2. Difference was I could still walk and he was totally plastered haha 😂

[DonkeyDan]

As I've mentioned on here before my first job out of my first stint at college when I was 19, was in an office that was all women. The boss of the company was a 50 year old divorced woman, from day one she was quite inappropriate towards me and encouraged the other women in the office to harass me too. I made the stupid mistake of telling her something about some bad people I owed money to at that time, and she used it to blackmail me into sexual acts, on threat of firing me if i didn't comply. I couldn't risk being fired or leaving the job because I'd have my legs broken if I didn't keep the payments up to the loan sharks and findimg another job at time was difficult. It took me 6 months to find a new job so I could get out of that job and not default on the payments to the loan sharks. I'd moved out of home at 18 and turned my back on my family so I couldn't go to them for help, not that I would have anyway, and that was one of the reasons I'd borrowed from the loan sharks in the first place. Bad mess, and a big life lesson.

[MCheetah]

I don't believe in "objectification." That's just called lust, and people have the right to find someone attractive or only think of them as a good sex partner without wanting to marry them.

But to answer the question (kind of), no, I've never had a woman make comments about finding me sexually attractive before. Although I've had gay men propose to me before. I didn't like it very much, but it didn't "offend" me or anything.

Man, I wish I had that "Tall Privilege." Women can "sexually harass" me all day long! Then I'll make bank by turning them into simps and telling them on the last day that I don't respect them and that they're just an ATM to me. I'll Amourath those suckers.

[MCheetah]

Also, I grew up in Philadelphia, but also spent time in Cherry Hill, NJ. Both those places might be very liberal, but they're also VERY un-PC and generally filled with assholes. If anyone were to make sexual remarks to me, it'd be in Philly. Never happened, though.

[DizzyDesii]

I dont mind being objectified long as theyre honest about seeing me as nothing more. The problem is, a lot of people are not honest about their intentions. Also, i dont mind being catcalled. The only thing i dont like is if guys don’t understand “no” or “leave me alone”. And i also dont like if men old enough to be my dad or grandpa hit on me. It makes me feel uncomfortable. But i dont see verbal words as sexual harassment unless its coming from someone too old. Sexual harassment to me is more of a physical thing and only if i didn't want it. In HS, if guys hit our butt, we’d playfully hit away. We were flattered. Now if i tell a guy “never do that again” and he does it again, then thats sexual harassment.

[t-8900]

Well I did get pissed and tell at them... then a few days pass oh look my ass is getting grabbed again. Uuuuugh this was not an enjoyable experience. My grandfather died around the time this stuff started and I was in an emotional black hole. The divorce was still fresh too and dad worked 2 jobs so I self medicated constantly.

[DizzyDesii]

I understand. I wrote the response before even reading yours

[AGhostSpider]

If a girl says no then something is seriously screwed up. I have with people talking about my ass, unsnapping my bra in public, it isn't just men sexually objectifying either. Sometimes a girl will harass a girl by saying "look at her wearing that top to show off her boobs like a total slut" causing me to cross my arms to hide them. Leading to body shaming and worrying about how others will see you. In my case, my dad was very sexually assaultive in saying dirty things or grabbing my hips to a point I can't stand being touched at all. It can happen to anyone but I am sorry you had to go through this

[t-8900]

eww girl I can't believe your father said/did that to you and I'm so sorry about it! Hope you are in a better place now though and I hope your present and future are looking brighter than your past!

[Mynameisbobby]

I've had similar things happen to me as well. From when I was 13 to now. When I told people about what was happening I was basically laughed at and told that I probably enjoyed it. When I was 13 girls would unbutton my shirts and touch my chest and stomach. Sad thing is that most girls/women really don't care. Including the principal at my school she would just laugh at me. Never got taken seriously 😒

[t-8900]

It is really frustrating they society basically acts like men can't be victims too. Then they get mad from the fallout and make complaints about us.

[Mynameisbobby]

Yeah it is very frustrating!! Thing is too girls know they can do whatever they want and never have any consequences for their actions.

[t-8900]

Well men have lost their voices. They are shamed and shutdown unfortunately.

[Beauweir]

Yeah I had it happen in the office today.
It was awful. Being stared at all day and flirted with in such a way that if I did it to a woman, I'd have been sacked in a day.
I've had women grab my ass in the past like the OP as well.
I've also had women in everything from club nights to my ex karate sensei think it's ok to rub or caress me in public, my permission be damned.
What bugs me is the negative reaction you get from guys as well, whether so called civilized colleagues in the office or dude bros in a club. They will ridicule and hate you out of jealousy or assume you are the one looking at the women and think you inappropriate.

[Aerissa_Jade]

Yes, I still do. It is so normal that I would be surprised if it didn't happen.

Usually it is larger crowds though, went dancing the other night and could feel guys brushing my butt, people groping and stuff.

It isn't usually that direct though, no one directly grabs something for fear of getting caught. They like to do it, like it was an accident.

The times I have been directly grabbed or groped is rare but has happened.

[ShaTTeredMasterpeace]

Yup. The fun part? All the boys that made my life hell in 8th grade with the bullying were the same ones that wanted to cop a feel when no one else was around.

[t-8900]

I had some similar things yes
As far as former bullies. One girl who stole from me and teased me eventually bought me dinner than made it a point she was totally single and opened up her purse to reveal a boatload of birth control. Around the time we finished our meal. i had this ungodly stomach pain and had to go home. ☺️

[ShaTTeredMasterpeace]

Lmaoooo

[DarkCarousel]

Leaving a club with my sister when I was 21 and had been drinking heavily, a group of men approached my sister about “buying me” from her. Makes me sick thinking about it.

[DarkCarousel]

It’s happened before under sober circumstances as well but that one just makes me repulsed the most.

[t-8900]

thats absolutely revolting. I'm sorry such sickos came into contact with you in any capacity.

[TrueConfection]

I didn't know of any girls grabbing guys privates in HS. They would have been the talk of the town! Were you at an inner city school?

[t-8900]

I grew up in Bear, Delaware. The inner city kids from Wilmington came to our school plus the notorious GTC: Glasgow Trailer Court. Plus my own neighborhood had its issues with drugs, prostitution, homicides, and drive bys. I survived it and many have. My high school was ranked most violent in the state. I'll PM if you want to know more.

[TrueConfection]

Ok, that sounds like it may have something to do with your experience. That's not the norm.

[t-8900]

My experiences dont define me. My actions, the lessons, the take away, that's what defines me. Sometimes i worry a girl will hear this stuff and assume the worst before getting to know me. I can understand she might be afraid. Until she meets me in person or sees me interact with a dog or child then she's gonna realize I'm the biggest freaking softy haha ^^

[TrueConfection]

I don't see why any girl should be afraid because of the things you listed here.

[TrueConfection]

I wasn't suggesting that those things "defined" you. I was replying to, "Actually in interested to know if I'm a rarer case, if I went to a rough school district, or something else."

[WhiteSteve]

I’ve been catcalled before by passing women (often drunk, lmao), and when I was a bouncer some girls would kind of sweat me a little. It was all in good fun though, it’s easy as a dude, these chicks aren’t going to rape me. Getting objectified by women is what a also refer to as “a lucky day.”😂 I don’t do well with nipple twisters though, glad that wasn’t part of the deal, lmao.

[IAMNathanael]

Not to my face. Not recently.

Only time I recall that might count was in middle school. A group of girls did a cat call to me. I thought it was just a bunch of punks trying to be funny for each other.

[kyleelyn199723]

Yes I have. It’s been that way since 5th grade. Yes I was sexually objectified in 5th grade

[kyleelyn199723]

And the sad part is a guy is now trying to invalidate my experiences with a thumbs down. I had guys (my brothers friends) holding me down and feeling up my boobs because they thought it was funny. They also did it to my brothers friends sister.

[t-8900]

Please tell me your brothers did the proper thing and kicked their asses? Please tell me they didn't let it happen

[kyleelyn199723]

@t-8900 he let it happen, but my brother is just as guilty doing it to his friends sister so it’s like 🤷🏻‍♀️ I didn’t even realize how wrong that was when I was little until I thought about it the other day

[t-8900]

Omg I'm so sorry! I can't imagine the emotional scarring from that. I did something screwed up to my sister when I was 8 or 9 years old. We got into an argument and I smashed a pb&j over her head. It was so wrong and horrible. I came from an abusive household myself where my mom gave only my sister attention. One day after years or abuse and neglect my sister pushed my buttons just right and that happened. I feel like shit for having done it. 🤦‍♂️

[kyleelyn199723]

@t-8900 hey at least you know you did wrong, so you can continue your future with thinking before doing. Totally great that you are self aware regardless of the environment you came from. I am sorry as well you had to go through that!

[Exterminatore]

I have experienced the same kind of thing in adulthood, while in the military and while working oddly enough in law enforcement. Frankly it didn’t bother me. Nobody but my ex wife of current wife told me they wanted to have my baby. I would have been a little freaked out about that.

[joeldalton]

I’m reading your question and looking at the profile pic and I’m confused.

[t-8900]

So am I. And yet it happened. Though I was half my current age about. But also unless you're gay maybe that's why? 🤔

[Shamalien]

Working in the restaurant industry as a young man, I’ve been groped and sexually assaulted several times. One older woman actually felt up my package 0_0 I was 17 or 18 at the time

[msc545]

Maybe just a little bit for me. Nothing like what you describe

[t-8900]

I grew up in a strange place I guess. Though when you think about it every place is pretty strange when you remove the familiarity of it

[msc545]

Very true

[InvaderSims]

You are so ugly I don't believe any girl did anything to you

[Rob17792]

yep i have several times

[Agape93]

Yeap. 99% of women have at least once.

[Subarugirl]

Oh yeah, countless times.

[TheFlak38]

Yes by faggots

[soccerchick4eva]

Yeah I have

[Gwenhwyfar]

Yeah