Why are Japanese people the most cold hearted in the world?

[Lookingforthetruth]

[Apulu_3]

Well I haven't heard about this at all! In fact I have a Japanese classmate and she is very sweet. Cold heart doesn't relates to nationality, race, caste or anything. @highlyvolatile what do you think about this?

[HighlyVolatile]

I think if someone is suffering on the streets without asking for help, like a homeless person shivering in the cold without asking for any help, Japanese can be so cold and cruel. They stick to themselves in those cases.

But if you ask a Japanese person directly for help, like asking for directions, they can be most kind. They might even take 20 mins out of their way to escort you to where you want to go.

Japanese people tend to mind their own business. That can come across as very cold when someone is in need of help without asking for it.

[HighlyVolatile]

The coldness of Japanese people doesn't come so much from one-on-one interactions. It comes from them wanting to conform and mind their own business. I 50% agree with the video but it's a framing issue. Japanese people can either be the warmest people you've ever met or the coldest depending on the context.

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile Well I guess most of the people are like that only. Japanese people are not the specific one for that.

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile Yes all kind of people come from all nationality. Either very warm or very cold. And most people tend to mind their own business.

[HighlyVolatile]

I find myself struggling and having a very difficult time explaining the unique ways that the Japanese can be so cold. It is true though in a way. I want to contrast "cold" from "hateful" though. Actually "hateful" is "hot" and "passionate". The Japanese style of coldness is really cold -- as in dispassionate -- you love the approval of the Japanese and they neither hate you nor love you -- they are just indifferent. Well, a starting point to understand is maybe the true meaning of "shouganai" (しょうがない) which is very difficult to translate perfectly to English:
http://yabai.com/p/3305

[HighlyVolatile]

* [...] you [/lose] the approval of the Japanese and they neither hate you nor love you -- they are just indifferent [...]

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile Oh you mean the blank type of emotions? Like no care and no love yet no hate? That is 'cold' only I guess. Or what I have learnt from K-dramas and C-dramas lol.

[HighlyVolatile]

If I contrast to Americans, Americans tend to hate people of whom they disapprove. That's not "cold", that's "hot". Japanese don't tend to hate such people. They become indifferent. They become cold.

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile Is it? I always thought 'cold nature' meant blank emotions. With maybe a tint of rudeness depending on the person.

[HighlyVolatile]

Japanese cold way is truly dispassionate. They simply don't care if they disapprove of someone. If you lose the approval of the Japanese, they treat you like you don't exist. They won't hate you, won't be rude to you, but they'll act like you just don't matter at all to them.

[HighlyVolatile]

They can't even be bothered to be rude to you or hate you. They just move on with their lives.

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile That's cold of my definition only.

[HighlyVolatile]

To be on the wrong side of Japanese people is maybe even worse than having a bunch of people hate you so much. They don't even acknowledge you and truly don't care anymore. People who at least hate us seem to care.

[HighlyVolatile]

If you have ever seen Hotaru No Haka (aka Grave of the Fireflies), I think you can get a hint of what I'm talking about. That is in extreme circumstances but a lot of the modern Japanese mindset is adapted from WW2:
https://youtu.be/4vPeTSRd580

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile I prefer to be ignored rather than being hated though lol. If it is a cold person then it means the person have a life and they are working on it. If someone hates someone then they don't have life so they are messing up others life.

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile Nope I haven't seen that. Is it an anime?

[HighlyVolatile]

Yes, but a very good one and -- while fictional -- not far from the truth. Actually, my father suffered a similar fate in Shizuoka. His parents didn't die in the bombings but he was stranded on a river together with his little sister and she died. At the hospital, they couldn't diagnose her so they just called it "shock". If you watch that film, I think you can understand Japanese way of thinking a little bit better.

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile I see. Thanks for sharing it. I will probably spend my summer vacation in that.

[HighlyVolatile]

It's not a very cheerful film as a warning! I wouldn't watch it if you're looking to be in a great mood after. But cheers! Apologies if I explained everything very poorly. Japan is kind of an alien culture in contrast to many others. I don't know how to explain how weird we are so well.

[Apulu_3]

@HighlyVolatile Nope. I get your point. I understood what you are trying to explain. Thanks for the warning though. I will still watch it.

[Anonymous]

I don't know about Japanese specifically but Asians I have spoken to are nicer than most if my fellow Americans.

[DryGermanGuy]

Impossible! Ze Germans are, or so I am told! 🙄

[Cuminginside]

They come off as efficient.

[lrina]

they aren't.