Is it true? Do people think like this?

Question

NikolasGLT · Accepted Answer

Yes, it is true.
No one cares about your problems and the ones that do, get paid for it.
Never, ever, tell anyone about your personal life and your problems, because gossip and rumours will start running like a "Broken Telephone" game.
I've seen many people who get hurt and suffer because they can't keep their problems to themselves.
The only person you can trust is yourself and maybe your partner with certain things but not everything.
No matter how kind a person is, the truth is that deep inside they don't care about your problem and they try to help a little bit out of personal moral principles... They are doing it for themselves to tell themselves "I helped" or "at least I tried" and then it relaxes them because they think they were not just a bystanders.
Of course there are people who do help significantly and they see through things from beginning to end, but again. They can't help with everything nor do they want to.
Asking for advice or suggestions is the best thing you can do for yourself or maybe google and look for posts from people who were in exact or similar situations like you are in.

Amakudari · Accepted Answer

1. There is no backing data or links to studies to back the claim, so it may be disregarded.
2. Share your problems as that is one way we humans can work through them. While there is the possibility that some may not care or be even be happy you have such problems, people who genuinely care about you will not have such feelings. That said, some issues are bigger than one listener can handle, which can lead them to either avoid you for their own piece of mind or shut down. For that reason, when it comes to really big issues, speak with a parent, a gradian, a very close friend, your boss (if you have that type of positive relationship..), but it is always advisable to speak with a counselor or therapist if you are unsure of who to speak with or scared to speak to someone who knows you closely.

As a general rule, don't overshare information with someone you just met or with strangers as they are not your counselor and can be offputting. (Then again, some folks may welcome the attention.)

Smoke-n-Growls · Accepted Answer

Oh god, I used to think like this. It literally made it impossible to make good friends.

I was also raised to think this by my abusive mother so she could extert her narcissistic control over me and my father.

It took me until 23 to meet people - bosses at work, actually - who genuinely cared for me and taught me this was bullshit.

You do need to be selective, but the 20% figure is the ones who do care. Then 75% don't care, and 5% are happy you're miserable.

When I started opening up to people I trusted, my life began to improve so much. People would help me, I'd help them, and we would build strong friendships.

It's too tiresome to distrust everyone, personally.

GurlMaster40 · Accepted Answer

I guess…. I have some really good people at my church that make me feel safe. I can open up to them easily because I feel safe there. One of my friends knows more than even my small group does but, I trust her and she cares about me. Everyone at that church loves me and cares for me, it makes me feel safe. It has taken me my whole life to feel so safe and happy at my church.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

It’s probably impossible to empirically support the numbers, but most people really don’t care. It’s easy enough to test. Pick a day when you’ll have as much social interaction as normal or more. When you greet people ask them how they’re doing. Even if you don’t usually ask that, it tends to prompt, “Fine. How are you?”. Then use that opportunity to test the fabric of the interaction. “Not so good.” “I’ve been better.” “Terrible.” Whatever works for you. If you’re blessed, everyone will fawn over you and devote their entire day to erasing your woes. If you’re like most of us, you’ll get something like, “Well it’s good to see you but i REALLY have to run.”. Ell oh ell!

A_stranger · Answer

Venting out your problems do help, but only to the people you can trust.

In my case, I prefer talking to a stranger about it anonymously, because they can't misuse it against me in any way and I don't have to care much about being judged either.

DavidRaul · Answer

Well i think thats somewhat true. People these days are so hypocrites that they just think about themselves. They would rather see you fail than being successful themselves. Believe me its frustrating when people do that. Keep your circle small and stay away from all the negativity , thats how you can solve most of your problems.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

It makes sense if you think about it. I used to be ultra-sensitive to what people would think... but my fake uncle pointed out that people don't really care. The ones dissing and trying to put me down are the same ones that don't give a shit and would celebrate if I failed harder.

DoctorSex · Answer

It's a very pessimistic way of viewing life.
Most people in their right minds don't think like this.
However, nihilistic styled mental illnesses are becoming more and more prevalent in the west. People are really suffering spirituality out there.

Kind regards,
DoctorSex

Agape93 · Answer

I don't. Here's how I see it.

I don't tell anyone the bulk of my problems because at minimum, they can't fix it, and at most, because I'll either be blamed for it or they'll ignore me and make me feel like shit for trusting them.

DizzyDesii · Answer

I believe it but if i keep it bottled in, it’ll only hurt myself more. So i dont mind being an open book. I dont take 90% of people seriously anyways and often only tell them what I’m okay with the world in general knowing

userxvi · Answer

Yes but maybe there is 1-5% of people who might actually care but generally yes I believe its accurate. And mind you, not caring does not = malicious, some people just have busy lives or responsibilities and they have to look out for themselves/loved ones first

DryGermanGuy · Answer

Complete nonsense. 80% of the people might care, but they have no possibilities or abilities to be of actual help.

Pinay_ako · Answer

Wow I am never glad when people have problems. I actually feel sorry for them regardless if it’s their fault or not. I do care if it’s something I can help with.

NathanDavis · Answer

I have lived and lead a very different life... lol

FreyaRed · Answer

Nope. Most people don't even hear what you say if you don't pet their egos.

Amy10223 · Answer

No, I don’t. There is no census anywhere that prices this.

maximumpower · Answer

People DO need to vent; however, the adage is pretty much correct.
It's also true that we spend 90% of our time attending to the problem 10% of the population - most of whom don't want help in the first place.

Bratsondanielle · Answer

I hope not otherwise humans are worse than I thought

purplepoppy · Answer

Most people are relieved to learn they're not the only one with that problem

genericname85 · Answer

no. i think like this: don't tell someone a problem, if they can't help you with that problem anyway.

-Asca- · Answer

If this is true why do I care about people and their problems and why do they seemingly care about mine?  This is only true if you live a miserable life with the wrong surroundings.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

I don't know. I think 20 % don't care 80 % do but can't help anyway.

joeldalton · Answer

No, more than 20% don’t care. The vast majority are only concerned with their lives. Very few people are actively against you.

RedThread · Answer

That's an incredibly cynical outlook on things.

zagor · Answer

I would reverse those proportions, but yeah.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

The 2nd sentence is true, but in that case, why not just tell them to the 20% who do care?

whiskeyontherocks · Answer

I’ve had to many us my problems against me.  I keep my problems to self for

Iron_Man · Answer

I don’t believe that at all it’s good to rant and get it out of your system

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

Some will also always use it against you, like how cops say they will when you’re getting arrested

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Other way around. 80% don't care and 20% glad you have them.

Snakeyes7 · Answer

Reverse the percentages and I think it will be more accurate.

Alex8736 · Answer

Hence the reason I never complain and steer clear of social media

B4852 · Answer

I know it's not exactly a political question, but sounds true of politicians.

Kevin1510 · Answer

About the percentages I don't know but I do believe that don't tell anybody your problems

wittymilf · Answer

I don’t think this is true.

SiberFox · Answer

This is true for men. Women operate differently.

Dargil · Answer

No I think not.

love_conquers_lust · Answer

Nope. Yes, pessimists think like this.

kao118 · Answer

To some extent

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Reverse is true

jamesgoldman · Answer

Yeah

Hulk30 · Answer

yea they do

jimmy2 · Answer

I hope not

insteadfew · Answer

Exactly true

Is it true? Do people think like this?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Is it true? Do people think like this?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.