What gender roles do you agree with? What gender roles do you not agree with?

[Anonymous]

So at this point in society it is known that some follow gender roles and others don't and some follow some and some ignore others so I felt this question fits well with our society today and let's see what y'all say, we are in a 'pick and choose era' lol

I put a traditional option for all the old schools, you aren't traditional if you don't agree with all of them but I know people agree with some and they don't agree with others so there y'all go ha

Traditional man (all of them)

Traditional woman (all of them)

[Minxxie]

I don't think picking and choosing is a bad thing! Every couple is different! It should be tailored to who we are as a couple and as individuals with individual strengths!

In my relationship, he pays for mostly everything because he has had more opportunities as a man and he has a better career. I also just think that men value what/who they invest money into and he feels a lot of pride from doing it.

He's working on buying us a house right now and I just know he's going to feel amazing about himself lol, as he should! It's super hard to buy a house these days!

I do enjoy cooking, but so does he, so I'll probably do most of it, but it's also an activity he really enjoys doing together, so we'll do that too. We are both really good cooks so feeding each other meals we made is a way we both show love.

He also likes to clean to relieve stress... so I can't do all the cleaning lol

I'll be working just under full-time for the foreseeable future so I won't have time to do all the domestic duties alone, once my debt is gone and I pay it off myself, most of my earnings will go into investments and retirement savings for our future. We also want to start businesses together so we can benefit from some tax write-offs.

We also don't want kids, or if we do we'd adopt one girl probably in our 40s when we have lots of money, since adopted kids tend to have trauma so we'd want her to have therapy and to never have to worry about money, even as an adult. Neither of our parents had tuition funds for us so we'd want our child to have her education covered. So I won't be a stay at home mom at least until then.

Our main goal is to be wealthy and travel a lot together and even if my career isn't as lucrative as his it would still really help us achieve our goals, including an early retirement. It's a harsh world financially so that's why our goal is to have dual incomes. I grew up poor and it was horrible, so I wouldn't feel comfortable not pulling in any money. Even if I do end up a stay at home wife I'd be running our business or businesses online for part of my day... after pilates and brunch of course!

[Asker]

Interesting, seems like a healthy relationship with even with all the picking and choosing lol

[Minxxie]

Haha yeah, we choose what works best for us and we tend to want all the same things which is amazing! I know that we can build the most enjoyable life for us as a couple! I'm excited for my future with him <3

[Asker]

Nice, it's good to see a healthy couple for once in a long time, my best wishes to your relationship. 💯

[Minxxie]

Thank you!

[IslaTheWitch]

I don't agree with predefined roles. I strongly believe people are born with unique traits and should enjoy them and not be forced to do things they don't enjoy.

if she is a great handyman, why shouldn't she repair stuff? If he likes to clean, why shouldn't he do it?

I'm for freedom of choice, communication and splitting any chores that have to be done.

[Asker]

Interesting take on the question, thanks for sharing Isla 🤣

[KrakenAttackin]

@islathewitch. At 2:00 AM when someone breaks in, who grabs the pistol and confronts the intruder.

[IslaTheWitch]

@KrakenAttackin I would :D I'm good :D winning some competitions :P

[KrakenAttackin]

@islathewitch. But would you want a man who was afraid to confront an intruder?

[IslaTheWitch]

@KrakenAttackin I live in Europe, where most people don't even see a gun during their whole life (maybe only on the hip of a policeman). I don't expect a man to know how to shoot :D I can cover this part. But as I'm rather... minimalistic in height and weight I would appreciate it if a man knew how to punch because I wouldn't be able to do it :D

[KrakenAttackin]

@islathewitch. My point is, women want a man who has strength (physical/mental) and who masculine.

[IslaTheWitch]

@KrakenAttackin sure... let's sync our dictionaries :D

[Minxxie]

@KrakenAttackin I have better night vision, but he's protective, so he'd likely stand in front of me and I'd snipe the intruder from behind him. Teamwork!

[antelope51]

@KrakenAttackin The dog gets there first because she's a bad-ass bitch.

[IslaTheWitch]

@antelope51 lol :D

[Joshydavid25]

People especially today often don't have the best view of gendered roles.. Mainly because they feel as if it was from a time that Mainly badly effected women.. "The Patriarchy".. But really they were roles to help us survive.. They played to men's and women's strengths and weaknesses to each other.. Today in the West, society is relatively safe, and so now people have the "freedom" to question gendered roles.. But let's be honest much hasn't really changed..

I wouldn't mind being the protector, and provider of sorts. And somewhat of a leader.. But, I'm not huge on traditionalism.. At least in the way the West nowadays thinks of it.

[aceleon]

i don't believe man being the provider, if anything i see it as a feminine thing.
for woman i support the traditional role but i also don't support the idea of a man being the sole provider.
for me the ideal household is multiple bi girls and only one guy.
this way the pros will be maximized while cons will be minimized.

[Asker]

Not just the provider but the head of the house in general, I don't see how that can be seen as feminine, I hope you don't plan on freeloading of your woman bro 😂

[aceleon]

i wasn't but i believe you didn't get my point
head of the house yes, the bank account or the money slave or the sugar daddy of the house? no
let me ask, did you ever see a king work? you can say they are rich from the beginning and their wives doesn't work either, then let me change the example, lions? only time i see a male lion in action is either he is a nomad or he protects the pride and before you say we are not lions i want to clearify that we are the same type of creatures biologically and socially and i'm not seeing them provide any resource, and again before you say they are not humans and their priorities are not the same, no, it still doesn't change the fact that working to feed only 1 woman is not rewarding enough especially when you could gain everything a woman has to offer to you from elsewhere without sacrificing anything like you do for the woman and AGAİN before anyone says man doesn't offer anything a woman can't get elsewhere either, no we actually do, do you wanna know what? security. we offer them security and protection even without having any benefits from that which they can't do the same for us, i don't know you but i wouldn't feel any safer going to my house in the midnight with a woman beside me, if anything it would bring me fear because she might attract unwelcome company around us and i would have to burden myself to protect her at the cost of not being able to properly protect myself. no matter what when it comes actually needing one another is the case woman are the ones who actually is in need, not man, oh there are also things that requires muscle strenght too, i can do everything a woman can do for me but a woman can't do the same, call me misogynystic or patriarchal, nature itself is this way, i didn't made the world this way but i'm sure as hell not complaining either.

[aceleon]

in short i would still work even if i had multiple woman who also work but not for filling their stomach or buying their 1000th pair of shoes they will only wear like once, in a scenario like this every money who won't go to me will either go to my kids or my pets aside from special days i'm not planing to spend even a cent on a girl cuz i refuse to be a provider, independence yes, provider no. i will feed myself and my kids alright but if you want to survive you better get your fat ass out of the couch and do something productive and be usefull or else you are as needed as a 3rd nipple.

[Asker]

I was joking bro relax 😂

[aceleon]

i'm relaxed bro i wasn't angry or something if anything i was in the mood, it is just i'm prone to long explainations, i don't like loose ends.

[Asker]

I get that, I try avoiding long explanations ha, i didn't misunderstand what you said, I just decided to troll rather than respond properly lol

[Thestupidusername]

I personally believe men and women exist to fulfill their own roles. Thats why we have 2 sex. And as data shows we are good at different things. But im not gonna play God and tell people how to live their life.

Either way.. I'm more traditional.. at least I would say.

[Asker]

Fair enough tiny but what makes you more Traditional?

[Thestupidusername]

I dont go out clubbing/partying. I never drank alcohol. Never did any of those stuff. I never sleep around. I've been working with taking care of kids for the past 7 years (soon 8). I've always wanted to be a mom and I want to be a stay at home mom for as long as possible. At least till my kids turn 6. I believe in marriage, I am religious. Im sure there are people out there who wouldn't call me traditional but I don't know.. id say im a bit more traditional than the avarage woman in the west but I could be wrong.

[Asker]

No you are right tiny, that's very Traditional, so what traditional things do you not agree with? 🤔

[KrakenAttackin]

@thestupidusername. You are very refreshing.

[Thestupidusername]

Well Im not sure. I think the only thing is I dont agree with the toxic idea people have of a traditional home but I dont think thats real cause I've seen it with my own eyes and its not toxic at all. But either way maybe there is something i dont agree with I just can come up with it now.

How about you? Whatw your thoughts on this?

[Thestupidusername]

*can't come up..

[Thestupidusername]

@KrakenAttackin 😂 thank you

[Asker]

I think you were raised with a traditional point of view tiny and personally I've seen a bit of everything and as a man I believe in all the gender roles a man plays but I'm open to things as long as it doesn't mess with the specific ones I believe in, although I believe in being the provider I'm open to the idea if she wants to participate in financially providing, this is one of them as an example.

[Asker]

Out if she wants to be the one to provide and I don't participate, I personally wouldn't want to do that.

[Thestupidusername]

I was raised to be the complete opposite of what I am... and what I believe in but thank you😅

And thats great! I hope you find that with someone:)

[Asker]

Well then forget I said that lol but the way you are now is Good, don't change.

And I still got work to do before I get into relationships but thank you, you too 🙂🎉

[Thestupidusername]

Thank you!:) i won't.

Sounds good!😊👍

[Asker]

😁👍🏼

[NathanDavis]

I've never bothered myself with archaic and prejudiced roles of any kind...

especially with a subjective one as "traditional"

the first mistake most people make is to think that there was only ONE tradition and nothing else out there, lol

[Djaay]

Age has 0 bearing on the fact that a female has a feminine nature to fulfill as well as a male to fulfill his nature , biologically speaking. Social contructed roles are not of biological content. Social contruct is the artificial security blanket for those with an agenda otherwise or an insecurity to fill artificially to look as if strength were instead.

[Asker]

I don't know about all that but alright

[KatherineJ]

My husband and I are pretty traditional. I don’t think it was anything that we consciously planned, but we fell into our respective roles naturally.

[AliceM611]

Define traditional

[Asker]

No need, you unintentionally already answered, I'm sure if you followed traditional roles, your know them 😆

[AliceM611]

Well if you are going down a traditional route then most women would be working in factories or helping out on the farm etc. The 1950s middle class stay at home housewife isn't traditional.
Proverbs 31
"15 She gets up while it is still night;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her female servants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers."

[Asker]

That was back then, there's no need for her to work in fields because all the food is purchased although I think this refers more to cooking and feeding her children, the bible can easily be taken out of proportion tho and it's important to read the topic of the story because just picking parts of the bible can be easily twisted, if have to read that chapter and see what's up with that

[Asker]

Id**

[AliceM611]

What's more traditional than the bible going back 5000 years?
Well if the husband is going to perform all the traditional roles such as provider, protector etc but most couples can't.

[Asker]

I'm saying things have changed from then, trust me I'm willing to try to kill a giant with a rock but there's no more giants, my point is that when you take the word of God, you have to take the guidance in your situation, you can't always take it literal cause humanity evolves, it was literal back then but as time goes by, the guidance can be used to your current situation but that's just my human brain talking, I don't know everything but I am glad you involve God so much in your life, very good 🙂👍🏼

[AliceM611]

I believe proverbs 31 is a good example for any young woman and I try to live by it.

[Asker]

Well it's surely not harming anyone, when and if y'all decide to have a kid tho, i do believe it's more important for you to be with the child than providing financially tho as you have the father for that, blesses to you Alice. 👍🏼🎉

[AngryCarl]

Whatever works for you.