What to do while party if nobody wants to dance with me?

[Anonymous]

Whenever I go with my friend for a dance we start dancing together but then many guys asks her to dance and nobody asks me because I'm ugly.

I am going today with her to a party and if would be such situation how to behave? Should I dance alone or sit and wait for her to be free?

And also can I go home if I would be sad? or I shouldn't leave her alone since we came together?

help me because I don't know what to do in such situatjon.

[jesstacia]

Dance alone. Try enjoy yourself without being put down by guys that ask your friend. Enjoy yourself without think about trying to attract guys. Don't care what other people think about you. That way you'll be more confident which could improve your attractiveness by a vast amount.

Looks might attract at first but personality keeps the guy. If looks don't attract at first, a guy could begin to like you for your inner beauty and as a result your outer beauty will also grow in your eyes. You may not attract guys immediately but with time, you may.

[Asker]

thanks;) but if would happen that I would dance alone all the time and my friend get much attention I would feel sad obviously , can I go home in such situation? or should I stay with friend since we came together?

[jesstacia]

You've just got to learn to accept that there will be girls that attract more attention that you seeing guys are visual creatures. I think staying will help you get used to that and maybe eventually, you'll stop feeling down when you see your friend with more guys. Situations like this happen all the time. There's a much greater chance guys who aren't so shallow approach you even if it were in smaller numbers.

[dodgersmom11]

Go out there and dance like Ellen... and what I mean is, she doesn't care what people think of her, she goes out every day on her show and just does what she feels when she dances and has fun, she is content and happy with who she is!

If you do that, I am sure some guy will want to dance with you :) Don't look sad or lonely though, make sure to smile and look like you have a ton of fun, they will wonder what they are missing out on

[Asker]

thanks;) but if would happen that I would dance alone all the time and my friend get much attention I would feel sad obviously , can I go home in such situation? or should I stay with friend since we came together?

[dodgersmom11]

Well if you wanna go home by yourself but how would you get home? Just make new friends, start talking to new people. Just small chit chat gets you far, trust me, I used to be horribly shy. I have been there, but now I'll talk to anyone

[Asker]

normally I would reach home why it should be a problem ? this party will be 15 minutes far from my home. But I don't know if it's right to leave my friend if we came together, what do you think? I said if it would make me sad I wouldn't be in mood to make new friendship:(

[dodgersmom11]

Well if its walking distance and you want to, go ahead but make sure you tell your friend first and she says its OK. Its only curtious. Well don't be sad... that's my point. People have ALWAYS picked me last or never at all for things but you know what? I don't care, I am a good person. I have good people in my life and its their loss if they don't wanna know me. I will enjoy myself regardless. Just takes a change in state of mind

[Asker]

yes when I go to a party I feel happy and I love to dance but always at the end I lose mood and cry at home when come back . But still I go to parties bcs I like to dance and don't want be considered boring. It makes me feel ugly that boys don't like me , how can I be happy then . But I will try to have fun thanks

[dodgersmom11]

listen here. I am 30 years old and NEVER even been on a date. I know I am not beautiful or super model type. however I know I have a great smile and personality. its been hard but I have learned to like who I am. I figure any guy is gonna be lucky with someone like me because I am devoted and honest and compassionate etc. however if they wanna choose someone prettier, that's their issue. don't be sad. things will get better, it takes time.

[Asker]

thank you very much for advice;) yesterday was this party and I did as you said, was dancing and having fun, bcs of you I understood I shouldn't care if boys like me or not, most important is that I like myself;) and even 2 boys danced with me, my friend get addention from more guys but I noticed that this 2 boys were nicer . And by the way I saw your photo and don't know how can you say you are not beautiful you have so beautiful eyes and smile , some boys are blind O.o

[dodgersmom11]

Thanks for BA and so glad to hear you got your dances! Thanks for the kind words... no guys have ever said that to me, so that's why I just assume I am not. I know I have a great smile though :) Glad it went well for you

[Spirit156]

To clear this up, she's more attractive then you and holding you down. We guys notice that and pick her instead of you

Also she is your friend but without knowing it (that goes for both of you) she is the alpha female and your the beta.

In short, you could be more beautifull then her but she has more confidence then you do and that's why she gets the guys to dance with her, just try to copy her on the dancefloor if guys pick her to dance with, you pick a guy to dance with

Trust me on this

[Asker]

She is more slim then me, she is very slim and guys like such girls more I think. I am not fat my BMI is OK but I am rather curvy , I have big breasts which is nice.. but stil guys doesn't notice me near her.

[Spirit156]

well if you don't have maggot fingers, a neckhead or a fake pregnancy. Then its all good, slim girls are pretty, but most often they get used by guys

[DeepBlue]

I always used to stand in the corner and get hammered. But I don't recommend you follow that example. Ask a boy to dance, there's no rule against it. It will make you come across as confident. Also, your friend needs to step up her game as a wing-woman. Tell her to start directing some of that surplus attention towards you.

[Anonymous]

Smile more and see what happens. I bet you are prettier when you smile

[Anonymous]

leave.