My girlfriend won't stop sighing

[Anonymous]

So, we've been in a this particular 6 years relationship, living together. We know each other very well.

Besides the good things that happened all these years, she never stopped complaining, not a single day.

She shigh from the morning to the night, talks to herself while alone complaining about situations of the day, complains while in shower, gets frustrated and angry for little things, etc.

I can easily tell that she is not happy, and we talked about this many times face to face, but she says I'm not the problem for her, she is just unhappy with her life, past of her family and unfair things in the world.

She has been doing therapy, but it doesn't seem to help her because she still complains a lot.

I'm really starting to ask myself is this is OK to live with, since I'm more like a peaceful, happy, positive guy.

We're probably getting married in a few months, and I do not know if I will be happy with her, having to deal with this problem every day of my life, is taking the energy out of me.

She has light still that remind me of the better days, and for so I still love her, but I'm not sure if we can be happy together.

Should I cancel all marriage plans or should I try it and see what happens? I mean, I realize there is only one life and this is pushing me to make the best decision on being happy and in peace.

[Phantom_operator]

Put the hold on the marriage. I see you are somewhere between 25-29 and you have been in a six year relationship. If she is sighing constantly, that is not a good thing. have you asked her what you can do to help her? What is bothering her in life that causes so much distress? If she says it is not you that is the problem, well it is your problem, especially if you are going to get married. Take my advice, go to therapy with her, talk with the therapist, talk with your girls. Have your girl write down (before therapy) or you write it down, 5 things that are bothering her throughout the day, and just 2 things that make her life wonderful. If she is not willing to better herself, then ask yourself this question. Do you feel you deserve to be with someone who always views the glass as half empty? Says she is unhappy with life? Not willing to help herself in the best interest of your relationship? Imagine yourself having children with this woman, trust me, (I am a aspiring psychologist) this woman if she does not intend to resolve her issues in life, her upsets, her low self esteem, will be the downfall to your life. If you are a happy positive guy, you should be with someone at your level. Why would you stay in a relationship with someone for six years when they have no intent to better themselves? Do not be afraid to approach the truth. Do not be afraid to confront the problem. Be honest with her, just as you are asking this question on a website seeking others opinions. It all starts with the person healthy enough to realize there is a problem, with all that said, go approach the problem, I would personally suggest you wait for six months of stability before getting married to this woman. good luck my friend.

[Racez]

You should try to postpone all the marriage plans.

It seems that she's getting uninterested. Find time to rekindle the old relationship. Start taking her out again to have some fun with you. Also, take a trip with her.

If she's still sighing and acting uninterested after that, you better move on.

[samhradh_leannan]

If I were you, I would postpone the wedding. It's not a good idea to get married when your relationship is on the rocks, and the further in advance you postpone it the easier it will be and the more respectful to everyone who is involved. Postpone the wedding, and then work on your relationship and see if it is still what you want.

As far as her sighing and complaining, that's a tough situation. I don't really know what to say. It's definitely not normal or healthy to complain 24/ 7. It doesn't seem like your relationship is the thing making her unhappy, though, so that's a good sign. My only advice is to continue to talk to her about it and try to understand the situation until you reach a point where you feel you can make a decision.

Good luck!

[Prettygurl12]

That's a tough one...I mean, I sigh a lot too, but I sigh out of contentment. My boyfriend (1.5 year relationship) questioned my sighing too, but now he knows. Also, I just sigh sometimes for no particular reason. But I don't complain all the time.

I might postpone the wedding if I were you. You don't want to have any questions when you pick a spouse. You want to make sure your spouse is someone you can live with and be happy with. Maybe postpone it a year? Or six months?

[freewill10]

Postpone what you can, tel her that she drains you, and whatever you do, do not have a child with this woman, unless she makes a turnaround for at least 2-3 yrs. Because that's when she'll get worse, and the sh*t will hit the fan.! Gluck!