Dating my landlord who also happens to be my boss

[Anonymous]

Last year I moved in to a house close to my school and when I first met my landlord I had this strange attraction to him. He is about 17 years older than me and has 2 kids from two different women. I usually don't date men that old, but since I was attracted to him, I agreed and we have been seeing each other on and off since March of this year. Now I even work for a store he owns because my contract ended and I had to leave my job. Obviously, most people would think that I dated him so that I can get away with not paying him rent, but that wasn't the case. I still paid him rent and still do. So anyway, let me fast forward...I needed a job a few months ago and he fired a pregnant lady to hire me which I didn't support(mainly because she was prego), but he said he had to let her go because she wasn't doing her job well and mentioned she was going to have a baby and will n't have time. Anyway, although I work for him now...we do a really good job of keeping our personal relationship away from business related matters. Although, he asks me to do personal things for him like send emails. He gave me access to his email password because he wanted me to look up something for work only to see an email sent to his email, addressing another woman's name whom I later find out is his girlfriend. I found out that he has been seeing me the whole time he has being in a relationship with her. He even picks up the phone and talks to her while at work with me. I found this out about two weeks ago and when I did, I didn't know how to react because we are not in a relationship and we work together...I just didn't want to make things awkward. So I went out on a date with another guy and sent my boss a pic of myself on a boat. Mind you, the guy wasn't on the pic...just me. I did this because I didn't know how to react to him lying to me...I felt taken advantage of and wanted to get back at him. We talked, and I apologized for sending that pic. Then we talked again and I mentioned to him that I kind of found out he had someone else in his life and I don't appreciate being taken advantage of. Then I told him that I can't even call him a friend and we are simply business partners and I had like to keep it like that so that things don't get anymore awkward at work. However, he talks to me like I'm nothing to him now. I felt sick when I went to work the other day and he made me go to the bank twice to deposit a check even after I told him that I wasn't feeling well. Yesterday, I told him I couldn't make it to work and he told me that I'm irresponsible. I mentioned to him that I can't sacrifice my health for his greed. Honestly, I feel really terrible right now and I'm not sure whether I should quit and move out so that I never have to deal with him. Or whether I should just quit and find another job or try and talk to him and talk to him and tell him to stop mistreating me,

Updates

+1 y

He actually was a lot nicer to me in the beginning, but all of a sudden I'm dealing with a different person. Also, I didn't think it was a good idea to go out with him, but he kept asking & saying that it's not a big deal that he is my landlord. Should I just leave the job & remain a tenant at his place (where he doesn't live so I will n't get to see him as much. or should I live his place too? I really like the location. Also, should I wait to find another job before I quit?

Updates

+1 y

I know it's not a healthy situation for me right now, but I have to be smart as well. I can't just leave the job because I don't have another job. Also, I can't just move out because I don't have anywhere else to go and I really like the location. I think it will be much easier for me to deal with him as just my landlord because I will n't see him much & don't have to stress about what he does in his life.

Updates

+1 y

Based on the background I gave & my last two updates, what do you all think? Your advice is much appreciated!

[Anonymous]

You gave yourself to this guy on a platter, he was just taking what was being offered, you didn't wait to see what responsibilities he might be involved in, you just jumped in and settled for what was there, but now you have morals, which is a little to late, and to him, you were just a little fun away from his norm, so really, you should move out of his life, because now that you have changed the game, he's no longer interested, and your just an employee now, so really, things could start to get really hard for you, because he's not going to want you around for long, so your better off moving on now before he gets tired of your presence,x

[Asker]

He actually was a lot nicer to me in the beginning, but all of a sudden I'm dealing with a different person. Also, I didn't think it was a good idea to go out with him, but he kept asking & saying that it's not a big deal that he is my landlord. Should I just leave the job & keep on renting his place (he doesn't live there so I will n't get to see him as much.) Or should I leave his place too? I really like the location. Also, should I wait to find another job before I quit?

[Opinion Owner]

You will need to make your own mind up in this situation, but all I can tell you is that things will get gradually bad, because now that you have shown him that your not willing to be his bit on the side, he won't have no use for you, so eventually, he will treat you the same way he did the pregnant woman, so I personally would move shop altogether,x

[Ehighness]

Omg your response is such a disgusting display of male stupidity. Yeah it's all her fault he holds no responsibility. Way to victim shame. Ew.

[ddsaenz]

oooh no yeah men tend to be assholes like that and take advantage of the situation. I guess next time be prepared for it and do your research on a man before you give yourself to him. But you never know some are just so sneaky so its not your fault. Just forget him and probably get another job so he can't fuck with you. You should stay in the house thou cuz you only see him when rent is do anyway :p good luck !

[Anonymous]

i think that you can do better than this guy and you should just move on from him, neither him nor you handled the situation correctly, but you should find another job before you quit just to have a secure income

[Anonymous]

Dump him! Don't out yourself in this situation anymore

[Asker]

Hi, I know it's not a healthy situation for me right now, but I have to be smart as well. I can't just leave the job because I don't have another job. Also, I can't just move out because I don't have anywhere else to go and I really like the location. I think it will be much easier for me to deal with him as just my landlord because I will n't see him much (he doesn't live with me) & I don't have to stress about what he does in his life. Thank you, your advice is much appreciated!

[Anonymous]

i think it was a really bad idea. I would not let that happen.