Male stripper who gave a lap dance to a woman is now being charged with sexual assault. Thoughts?

Question

So basically this woman goes to a strip club with her friends and pays this stripper for a lap dance at which time, according to the stripper, she touched his dick (something she denies). Afterwards she paid him more money for a private lap dance at which time, again according to the stripper, she gave him a blowjob and he briefly penetrated her. After the dance, she texts a friend saying she wonders how she's going to tell her boyfriend. When her boyfriend picks her up she tells him she was sexually assaulted..

Thoughts? Frankly I'm pissed. Not only did she cheat on her boyfriend but she's trying to cover her sorry unfaithful ass by ruining some poor guy's life. Some guy is giving you a lap dance and you grab his dick and then pay for a PRIVATE lap dance where you give him a blowjob obviously he's going to think you are down for more. Now before people jump down my throat, I do believe most victims of sexual assault. I have been sexually assaulted multiple times in my life. I just don't believe this one woman.

abc3643 · Accepted Answer

It would have been better for this question to have referenced a source. Since you did not, I will.

In a nutshell, the male stripper was convicted of sexual assault based on bias of the judge in the original case. The judge's conviction of the stripper has been set aside so that the stripper gets a new trial. Something important to note is that the "victim" woman had never experienced a strip club before. He may still be guilty, but will likely be acquitted do to a "he said, she said" situation.

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Male stripper who performed lap dance on woman gets new sex assault trial
torontosun.com/.../male-stripper-who-performed-lap-dance-on-woman-gets-new-sex-assault-trial

TORONTO — A male strip-club performer convicted of sexually assaulting a woman who paid him for a lap dance should get a new trial because the judge relied on stereotypes of how women behave, Ontario’s top court ruled on Thursday.

In quashing the conviction against Damir Cepic, the Court of Appeal faulted the judge’s reasoning in deciding the complainant, 23, did not consent to sexual activity with him.

“The trial judge’s path to conviction rested largely on a series of erroneous assumptions about what a young woman would or would not do in the circumstances of this case,” the court said. “The conviction must therefore be set aside.”

The case arose in March 2016, when the woman, identified only as OI, and seven girlfriends went to the Foxxes Den in Toronto to celebrate a birthday, court records show. It was OI’s first time at such a club.

During the evening, OI paid Cepic $10 for a lap dance. He would testify she reached into his pants to touch his private parts, something she would deny. She then paid Cepic, 29, another $40 for a private lap dance. This time, court heard, she performed oral sex on him and he briefly penetrated her.

Cepic testified at trial before Superior Court Justice Anne London-Weinstein that he was already having intercourse with the woman and about to ejaculate when the woman said, “no, I have a boyfriend.” She denied saying that and testified she told him, “no” and tried to push him off her.

After the dance, OI texted a friend wondering what to tell her boyfriend. She also said she was worried her father, a police officer, would be furious, court h
When her then-boyfriend arrived to pick her up, she told him she had been sexually assaulted, court heard. She reported the incident to police several hours later. Police charged Cepic with sexual assault.

The only issue at trial was consent. OI argued she was forced into fellatio and intercourse. Cepic, described as a hard-working and trustworthy father, said the woman had been a willing participant.

London-Weinstein sided with OI, saying she found the complainant reliable and credible, and Cepic self-serving.

For example, the judge rejected Cepic’s evidence that OI had touched him sexually, saying it was unlikely the woman would have done so on her first-ever lap dance. The judge also called it “completely implausible and nonsensical” that OI would have told the accused about her boyfriend just as he was about to climax.

London-Weinsten convicted Cepic and jailed him for two years less a day.

Cepic appealed, arguing the judge had relied on stereotypes and assumptions, while OI maintained London-Weinstein was entitled to rely on common sense assumptions about basic human behaviour.

(more)

englisc · Accepted Answer

People think false accusations are so extremely rare because they believe that women are morally superior to men. That's the reason women are more likely to get the benefit of the doubt in these cases.

Really women can be just as bad as man, and the main reason a woman would lie and falsely accuse a man of sexual assault or rape is to protect her reputation and to avoid responsibility for her actions. Cheating is one of the main times women will make a false accusation, because if she saus it was rape what can the boyfriend/husband say about it? He can't shame her or attack her for it. He can't get angry about it. And if she's cheating she already has fucked up morals.

Male strip clubs also work differently to female strip clubs as has been mentioned by others. Women act differently. In female strip clubs most men are pretty calm, they just watch the women. If they get touchy they get thrown out quick. In male strip clubs the women often act crazy. They touch all the time, and because they're women touching men nobody cares. I dont really give a shit because strippers are no good people, but the point im making is that women are much more sexually aggressive with male strippers than men are with female strippers because they can get away with a lot more. It's also a place where they feel free to do so in ways that they can't elsewhere.

So this guy would have no need to assault or rape a woman. Those guys get laid all the time and women pay them for it. So yeah, his story is completely believable. Hers just isn't. I just wonder what the boyfriend will do, that's a fucked up position to be in.

AuroraRoseat · Accepted Answer

1) Seems like he's getting a new trial because of the judge making assumptions about the woman. Good. 2) This is why I feel there should be cameras in these "private" booths: to protect the dancers and the clients.  3) We can't make assumptions about what happened but I'm inclined to believe the man here.

NightFlirt · Accepted Answer

First and foremost she was at a strip club which kinda negates the whole sexual harassment argument. IF he did penetrate her without consent why didn't she report it to the club owner as soon as it happened? I think this woman is just a bitch and hopefully her boyfriend dumps her trifling ass.

smahala1991 · Answer

Dont most strip clubs have a no touch rule?

Anonymous · Answer

Men, it's very easy to avoid a false allegation,
Women give false allegations almost 100% for this reasons,
1) crazy
2) a golddigger who wants your money
3) a girl who fear of soicity will judge her as
a "slut"
4) a revenge from a girl who's angry on you in bad breakup/rejection

Solutions:
1) never fuck or have any meaningful connection with a crazy woman (mild depression or anxiety could be passed)
2) never cohabit with a women unless your official couple or married (in most Western countries marriage aren't good option but that's another issue) always have as many preups style contracts as possible and resign them if needed in your state before experation
3) any women will fear being shamed as slut or a cheater, never fuck marry women or women in an LTR, in a hookup always give her a possible deniability don't take a girl out of party explicitly in front of her friends, use the "let's go to a walk" "let me show you how to play my new guitar" reteric, don't brag about it in public,
Don't leave with her in the morning to a public space together
4) during breakup/rejection, never make show in those cases no matter how terrible person she is, any women will act nastly if the male is the one who dump her so I would suggest that if your in a LTR and want out you should do the "loser protocol" just act like a whiny bitch who need attention all the and talk about your problems, dress ugly and nerdy, ask for help opening jars cry a lot and so on, after 2 weeks tell her you need find yourself and after you free, act normaly again

Also, unless your married or in common law cohabit always have a hidden camre of any hookup and save in an ecripted drive, never show to anyone don't tell it to anyone and keep 2 copies in different locations

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

Yeah, that sounds about right. Not the first time a cheating whore has claimed rape to hide the fact that she was a cheating whore. Piece of shit human being all around, can't be faithful and has to try and destroy the life of some one else in order to avoid the justified punishment of being a piece of shit human being. As for the rest of your statement I don't "believe" most victims, I believe evidence, believing some one simply because they claim it does not make for a very fair system. In fact that's why false accusations are so high (studies have consistently placed false accusations upwards of 40% simply because they know they can get away with it and if they don't their is rarely any consequences to them (the mans life is ruined of course but if your going to falsely accuse some one of rape/sexual assault then your a piece of shit human being so your not going to care). Shame to because now it just makes it harder to believe people who are victims and makes it harder for them to get justice (which makes this woman and women like her even more of a piece of shit then they already are).

EpicDweeb · Answer

Yeah no this is a horrible woman and I hope he sues her back for slander. I really wish there were worse consequences for false rape accusations. It ruins people's lives and it's not a victimless crime. It tarnishes a reputation which can be the most valuable thing you own and it's something that's very difficult to get back. If you hurt or offend a woman all she has to do to get revenge is claim she was raped. It's not like it doesn't take effect if she's proven to be lying, it harms the reputation either way. It's not okay and it needs to be dealt with more harshly.

Don't get me wrong, I understand it's hard enough as it is for people to talk about trauma like that and if they can't get conclusive proof you don't want to go punishing the victims. But, those who are falsely accused of rape are victims in their own right and they likewise deserve justice.

FunkyMonkee · Answer

I'm with you! WHAT was she doing in a strip club in the first place? Then she PAYS for a lap dance TWICE, blows the guy and THEN cries RAPE? I DON'T THINK SO!!! She GOT what she wanted AND paid for TWICE!!! That'd be like me paying for a hooker to fuck me and when she was done I told the police she molested and raped me! If this guy gets into trouble over this, SHE needs to have HER skanky ass belittled in public and on social media AND tossed into jail!! As it is, she should at LEAST be bitch-slapped for it!!

DDpsy · Answer

Clearly that is your internalized misogyny speaking. That guy was clearly a capitalist pig in the service of the patriarchy and the woman was forced by vile normative social constructs that have pushed her to resort to paying male sex workers to express her innate sexuality. I blame the systemic oppression of women during the inquisition for this whole thing. The guys clearly needs to be castrated and imprisoned. or at least he must be removed from his very privileged position of of power and prestige.

Cmcelts15 · Answer

Women are too powerful in the sense there is no repercussions for lying or breaking laws where they can get away with anything and hide behind the fake feminists movements. Look what happened to Brett kavenaugh, 3 women admitted they lied to help sway judges opinion. Nothing came if it so now real rape victims will face doubt more than ever

www.google.com/.../

Spencer10 · Answer

This is a very interesting case. I think once again it all comes down to what is considered consent. Is the mere act of paying for a private dance considered consent? Probably not. As a stripper it is imperative to be confident that the customer is giving permission to go further. Like all human reactions there are grey areas. In my opinion there is not enough evidence here to convict. But we shall see. As some one in this industry this case is very interesting and has given me lots of food for thought.

markscott · Answer

Moral of the story, if you pay for a private lap dance, you may get more than a dance. It becomes a he said, she said, situation. It's a little like a guy paying for a private lap dance, and complaining because she touched his dick and sat on it. Sometimes, if you put yourself in a very foolish situation, you don't have much protection, because there is no way for the courts to come to a fair conclusion about what happened. So stay away from strip clubs, or at least stay away from private lap dances.

madgoat · Answer

Accusers should be genuinely listened to and treated with respect but you can't just flatly believe them.
The club has left itself and its operatives open to this by not having covert cameras.
Who knows what each of them was thinking and feeling at the time.

GhostMochi · Answer

Wow seriously? I hate women like that. She literally just shit on the guy that SHE approached and then covers up her cheating with "he sexually assaulted me". Seriously, I feel like women have gotten out of control these days. They can say men do this and men do that, but honestly, girls are causing more trouble for men in my opinion.

musicbrain5 · Answer

Yeah, that’s not sexual assault. She paid him to do that and when she regretted it, that’s when she whined and pressed charges. Hope her boyfriend breaks up with her because she’s crazy.

This happened in my city, and that neighbourhood seems to attract the seediest kinds of people anyways. So I’m not surprised.

Lauren-green · Answer

Regretting consensual sex is NOT rape. I will say it again for the people in the back. REGRETTING CONSENSUAL SEX IS NOT RAPE!!!

Texaskid1 · Answer

I would say that both will probably be charged with public indecency ( she did blow him and he allowed it). She is dumb as fuck because she catried out a sex act in public. She is trying to get the guy in trouble to cover up the fact that she cheated on her boyfriend. But by going to police she has screwed herself over - she also comitted a crime. The state is going to have a hard time proving this was rape.

On a personal level she is a nasty ho. I hope the boyfriend dumps her ass.

Miristheiss · Answer

I think strippers are scum and those who go to strippers are scum.
I kind of don't care what happens to either of them at this point.
by the way, the guy... the boyfriend should definite leave her. Even if her story is true... her paying some male stripper for some "private" show? Dump her ass.

Legally though, this sounds like your typical he said she said... there is no real way to know what happened, prove or not prove anything. You can't really rule one way or the other.

Pineapple_Boy · Answer

I remember this story when it first happened, but had no idea the guy got convicted because her story made no sense. If I recall correctly, the private room just had a curtain separating it from the rest of the club and her friends was right outside.

There are women who regret sex and cry rape.

Anonymous · Answer

Sounds like bs to me. How does she even explain where she met this guy who "assaulted" her? "Oh by the way I was assaulted at a strip club"
She went there in the first place and played for it. If she actually sent that text wondering how she would "tell her bf" then it sounds it me like she made up some crap lie to come out looking like the victim and still keep her boyfriend. Which is not cool at all.

Alpha09 · Answer

If that's what happened she should go to prison. Lying about that shit is no joke.

hahahmm · Answer

Yes, lots of women have been abused but it’s also true that a lot have lied on guys. Women need to stop blindly supporting every accuser. We’re fast approaching ‘the boy who cried wolf too many times’ territory

Anonymous · Answer

This is why I dont believe most victims of sexual assault outright prefferering evidence instead to determine guilt or innocence. If there is men bad enough to rape then there's certainly many more women bad enough to make false rape claims.

Male stripper who gave a lap dance to a woman is now being charged with sexual assault. Thoughts?

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