I can't find a man. I haven't been with a man in six years. I have a pretty face but I'm a plus size woman.

First off, even if you do loose the weight you must still have the personality and self confidence. I'm sure you want a quality guy. A quality guy will not stay with a girl long term just because of her looks. Only an insecure one will. Genuine self esteem about who you are in terms of action, morals, out look, etc. is the key to long term happiness and a healthy romantic relationship.

However, the harsh reality is that it is a practical move for any man or women to loose weight if they want to maximize their chances at finding a suitable lover. Unfortunately, this goes doubly for a woman seeking a man. What distinguishes a friend from lover in a man's eyes is sex. A woman can be attracted by confidence, intelligence, wit, etc. These qualities too can enhances a man's overall attraction to a woman that he's all ready physically attracted to, not the other way around. He has to want to have sex with her before all of these other things even come into play. By design of nature men are more visually oriented than women. True, cultural differences or fads come into play and influence all of us, but there is no way to change a man's basic nature. I don't buy into any of that "If he's not going to be with you because you're heavy then he's just not worth it." Not being turned on by that is not a character flaw. Most men prefer average weight women to overweight or even bigger women. So a man who falls into this overwhelming majority who has the choice of two women with more or less equally pleasing personalities but one is pretty big, how do you think he will chose? If you did loose weight the number of men you could pick from would increase dramatically. The more men to choose from, the higher the numbers of good ones to choose from. Same for a man. Moves out of Mom's house, more choice in women. Unemployed to employed, more choice of women. Ignorant to educated, more choice of women. That's just how it is. Fair? I don't know. But it is the truth.

Most importantly, it's just not healthy. I have lost weight and I must say I feel better not just because I accomplished a difficult task, but eating right and exercising makes you happier. You simply have more energy. If you consider your weight a problem, then be thankful that you have a problem you can change.

If you chose to remain the weight you are (I'm going to assume that you truly are plus sized and not just an average sized girl who has wildly unrealistic standards or someone who is culturally overweight but not “big”) you're stacking the deck against yourself in terms of health and number of potential suitors . Is that the most logical thing to do?

If you refuse to loose weight, don't care about the health consequences or appearance, then you must accept that it will simply be harder for you than a thinner girl to attract men. If you decide to loose weight, please, no fad diets. Do some research.

Yes it is...

You'll find guys start to get interested if you lose some... and if you really are more interested in men, you will find this refreshing... promise :)