Why won't my ex-boyfriend leave me alone? I can't start a new relationship he finds a way to break us up. Help
Once I break up with another guy it seems like he is blowing my phone up trying to contact me. My ex-boyfriend had told me that it seems like I have...
Most Helpful Girl
I had an ex like this. He would treat me very poorly but whenever I wanted to leave he would do his best to try to reel me back in. And I would. It would be the same cycle over and over again. I would come back, treat him too nicely, cater to him, get nothing in return, get mad and leave. He would then call me and tell me everything I wanted to hear. I'd come back and he'd slip right back in his old self. That gets old but habitual. I did it for 6 years! I finally realized he was not worth my time and left for good. He kept trying but stopped after a while. I am now engaged to a man that is worth every bit of my heart, love, support and kindness. He is such a giving and sweet soul. It's truly an amazing feeling.
This ex keeps coming back because you let him come back. He gets an ego boost out of knowing that he can come back. He loves the devotion and love you give him. It feeds his ego. He knows that he doesn't have to return the same amount of giving and love because you allow him to be this way. He's taking advantage of you. Break the cycle, move on and never look back.
What Guys Said 7
If he broke up with you, he may want to get back.
If YOU broke up with him, you need to tell him in person that you enjoyed the time you that you did have and that you are ready to move on. when you say this to him, be very professional. don't do anything to let him think you still want to give it another try.
take it as a compliment. but don't put up with that.
Explain to him that he needs to meet other people and that he needs to learn from this obvious mistake. He will move on and he will think back fondly on you if he can realize that he can learn from his mistake of being a desperate, needy ex.
You deserve your freedom from his neediness and he deserves the chance to start new with someone else, and hopefully not project a "spell cast" next time around (because that is all coming from him, I'm sure that you are amazing but I doubt that you are the only girl he can ever have feelings for)
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its pretty clear you broke this guys heart and he is in pain, and he won't be satisified till you feel some of the pain he has to live with.
are you regularly talking to your ex? if so, that might be a mistake. for reasons like you describe, I've learned it's usually a bad idea to be friends after a break up.
and why would you want to be friends with someone who gives nothing in return?
have you clearly and specifically told the ex that there's 0% chance of you two reuniting? if so, and he still pesters you about getting back together, it might be time to cut off all contact.
Two words. Restraining Order. When it's over it's over. If Seargeant Stalker can't comprehend this, then buy a can mace to entice his decision making.
get a restraining order and yell at him that you don't want anything to do with him
What Girls Said 10
Well Anonymous, most of us girls are pretty heartless so I'm sure it means a lot to a guy to have someone who is always there for him. Since it sounds like he's pretty selfish ('I get nothing in return') why wouldn't he want you back since you cater to his sorry ass. LOL.
There is no spell, that's just game that he's running on you. You don't need to share with him when you break up with another guy. As a matter of fact, don't contact him at all. He only comes back because you allow it. Tell that Loser to Kick Rocks!
You wanted to know what's going on. No one can do anything to you that you don't allow. It's your choice to cater to his narcism and so you have to take responsibility for your poor treatment by him. Only you can stop his behavior by not reinforcing it.
Happy New Year! Move on and avoid him.
Guys stay with the girls who make them feel good about themselves. It sounds like you did that, so now he is in love. Think of the way you have felt about the guys you loved in the past. There are chemicals on the brain involved making him think about you all day long. He is going through withdrawal.
The best thing to do is to tell him like the guys said that there is 0 chance of you getting back with him. He thinks there is a chance that he can change your mind. Let him know that you have moved on and don't have any feelings for him anymore in the romantic sense.
Don't be his friend. It just prolongs their belief that they can get you back, etc. Just imagine if the shoe was on the other foot. What would you want the person to do or say if you were acting this way?
We've all been rejected before. It hurts, but usually we are just waiting for that person to tell us that there is a chance or that they will never feel the way we want. The sooner he knows for sure which of those is going on in this situation. The sooner he will move on.
You have 2 options. If you broke up with him then you can always get back together.
if he broke up with you, I don't think you want to go through everything all over again, and if you want him to leave you alone try to ignore him, don't answer his phone call. It will be really hard, but you have to try!
It sounds like he is clingy on to you. Basically he hasn't gotten over you. And still feels you should be with him apparently he didn't get the message just ignore him he will go away
I know how you feel. The reason is because ur prob a really caring person (you did nothing but be there for him) a lot of people won't appreciate that until they reflect. You really give your boyfriends everything "love with nothing held back" That's like him having a million dollars to his disposal everyday then getting used to taking it all everyday and being left with nothing. Don't worry about it hell find someone else and maybe not as good as you but his loss.
I'm in a similar situation. I was with my ex for 4 and a half years... I was crazy about him and loved and respected him but got disrespect, lies and dumped repeatedly in return. To give an example of how it was between us, he only ever bought me 1 birthday present in the 4/5 years we was together yet he got a something ever year. I was such a fool! My family didn't like him and neither did my friends. So last year was the final straw he'd hurt me enough times to the point I didn't respect him anymore... As if a switch went off in my mind I didn't feel anything for him anymore. So when he threatened to dump me again I said fine, so he left me... 2 weeks later he's "missing" me again but I didn't give in my mistake was I decided to remain friends with him and he thought I was playing hard to get. So finally at the end of November I blocked his number and felt so happy! But he's not stopped bothering me ever since! he began calling me off another number so i couldn't answer any numbers I didn't recognise so I changed my number, then he sent me a message on Instagram and I blocked him and deleted the message before reading, then today I get an email saying I miss you. He never appreciated me when he had me and I bet now he needs someone to make them feel worthless. It makes me sick hearing from him and I'm just hoping he'll get bored and get a life... I just wish I cut complete contact much earlier.
Tell your ex boyfriend that it is over and get a new number.
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