Why do most men prefer to marry and have kids with unattractive women?

this is what I have noticed a lot. all my friends from high school who are unattractive are married or have lots of kids. all the nice looking ones? not so much. I know I know you guys are going to say "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" or "not everything is about looks" and I KNOW, but I want to know why men prefer to settle down with less attractive women? you guys are prob going to say "WELL THEY ARE PROBABLY NICE AND NOT MEAN LIKE PRETTY GIRLS" not the case. most unattractive women I know who are married are very mean, for example my boyfriend's cousin is married to a very mean woman. she cuts him down, smacks their kid and she's only 2 and treats her husband like garbage. he had a chance to be with a very nice girl who is very pretty and he rejected her for his now wife. I don't get it. I can see if you meet someone and you don't care what they look like and they are the sweetest woman on earth, but idk...it's like men don't care if they are treated badly. its almost like they would prefer to marry an unatractive mean woman over a pretty nice one. also I have noticed most men like to settle down with less attractive women and like to date the pretty ones. why is this? when I was big and didn't care for myself and went out looking haggard I had no problem with guys wanting to commit and had been proposed to. now that I care for myself and lost weight and look nice (still the same person on the inside! I'm still nice!) guys just wanna date me is there a reason why guys are like this?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Here is the truth. Guys that are average and below know their chances of getting a girl is slim. Its hard for a regular guy to get a girl. They'll start settling a lot faster than a hotter guy. A hotter guy knows he can get other girls so he messes around a lot more. Hotter guys tend to not want deeper relationships. If they do have one, it will be hard for them to commit knowing they still have potential. If the guy has always been hot then he will mess around a lot and not settle with a girl as much. If a guy was once really overweight and is now real hot after working out a lot then its possible his mind is still in the fat suit mode so he might be willing to settle much easier than a guy that was hot from the start. It all depends on the guy also. If a hot guy had a lot of bad luck with girls just wanting him for his body then eventually he will want a serious relationship with real love. It just takes time for the hotter guys to settle down. It all comes down to options. Same thing applies to girls. I know tons of people that were hot and got really overweight and now want to settle. Only because they got less attractive that they now decided to settle down. They know their chances of getting a guy or a girl is harder so their standards lower every week or month that passes by. Eventually some people will take anyone. A lot of guys and girls say its the personality but in reality in the real world its more like the looks gets you the door open while the personality keeps the girl or guy with you. I wish it wasn't like that but that's just how the world works these days.

    • Guys that are hotter that end up with a lesser attractive girl are ones that use to be overweight usually then worked out a lot. Still have that mind set that they are still the same overweight person in the mind. This can happen to hot guys also. Some hot guys get burned out from hot girls not really liking them for real or acting fake. Just liking them for their body and not giving them emotional love. The perfect girl for a guy is a nice sweet caring hot girl. Not many have both though.

    • I used to wear glasses until my pre-teens. I wore contacts for 10 yrs, and felt attractive. Two years ago, my ex stopped noticing me; stared at every girl around us. He was the guy who was overweight who still sees himself that way. He needed them to look at him to feel good. He made the gym his priority, and didn't realize I loved him the way he was. I started dumbing down my look, left my glasses on, wore casual and baggy clothes because I was tired of being looked at by everyone besides him.

What Guys Said 21

  • i have to call you on your question, not arguing, just sayin, most guys that look for that beautiful girl, to marry, have kids with, won't ever be interested in the guy looking for her. she always looks for something better. sadly realizing later she's lost her chance. so.. the guy settles for less but in the end lives 90% of the time, happy and married to awomen most other women wouldn't find attractive at all or men. but inside he loves her, and thinks she's attractive,. I will admit, it is also the thing of the "ugly" ones, and that's strong to say, but yea, in societies eyes, the ugly ones are easier, and the pretty hot sexy beautiful ones are harder,..

  • Yeah, I don't think that's the case. Guys will choose nice and hot over unpleasant and unattractive 100 times out of 100. But there are two things to consider. First, life is rarely that clear in the characterstics of people. Most everyone is a mixed bag of all kinds of positive and negative traits. Second, you don't always have the CHOICE to pick the nice hot girl. There are only so many of them to go around. So why aren't THEY married, while some of their uglier, unpleasant sisters are? Because the hot nice girl has OPTIONS. She can be pretty choosey. She doesn't have to settle for the first guy to come her way and often she doesn't.

    • That's because nice attractive girls want nice attractive guys. If everyone would learn to just be patient God can send both people what they want. I'm a beautiful sweet girl, who prefers handsome nice guys and I'm not about to settle for the opposite. It's not just about the girl being attractive and nice, the guy has to be those things as well. God will see to it that those two people find each other at the right time.

    • Yes Georgia, if you read what I wrote, you'll see the point where I said hot nice girls have OPTIONS. That means they can be choosey. Which of course means she can opt for nice and hot in a guy or hot and rich or nice hot and rich, or whatever she's going for.

  • I would never marry a woman who I thought was unattractive, why settle when I know I can get a more attractive woman? Now my girlfriend is smoking hot, and we get along great, would I marry her just because she is hot, no but it did play a big part in me wanting to date her.

  • I know what you are talking about. Beats me.

    LOL I hope I do not end up like that.

  • average women are less picky and more likely to make a good mom while a hot chick is working all the muscles in town are in party mode for years

    • but I am a fantastic mother, and am over partying. I want to get married I'm getting old, but I'm not willing to make myself unattractive. do you think there is any guys out there who would like to be with a hot woman and marry one?

    • Show All
    • from southern california, my standards to be honest are pretty low lol. I go for average looking guys usually, though I have been with less than attractive men before also, and extremely attractive men. the way I think with guys is...if they treat me right, don't call me names, don't cheat, then I'm game heh. but still I have bad luck heh.

    • haha I'm perfect for you and in arizona. And a massage therapist lol jk. Stick with it and you'll find a good guy

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What Girls Said 18

  • haha oh dear!

    Jamaica Outtttttttt

  • that's a good question. I have good looks and people say I have great personality and inner beauty. (others say it, no myself k..) but I been through a few bad apples. like 2. but I haven't found anyone who will commit to me yet which is frustrating as heck. it might be that I won't settle for less and as I am getting older, the options are somewhat thinning out, I'm not that old but I guess like someone said already, if they know they can fool around and not commit, they'll do that till they're ugly and older and finally settle down for less or anyone willing to put up with them.

  • Because they don't care about what's on the outside they care about how that person makes him happy. its all about what's on the inside that counts.

    • if that was true then men would't push away the pretty girls most of the time...and they wouldn't settle down with a woman who is abusive emotionally who is not attractive just because he wants an unattractive woman.


    • did you even read the question?

    • yes I red the question. I'm saying just because you might not find them attractive don't mean he does.! its not all about looks anyone.

  • It's really weird,my uncle married a fat ugly woman with an ugly personality.I don't get why too:(

    • Some women were nice in the beginning but get real mean and controlling after they feel insecure about themselves later when letting themselves go. Most miserable women are the ones that envy other girls beauty. They then take out their anger on the guy. Bullies are usually insecure in some type of fashion.

    • Yep, kinda like the QA

    • i don't envy anyone's beauty I am completely 100% happy with my appearance. I was always bullied when I was younger because I was overweight and was beat up. so I got in shape and started taking very good care of myself. I just feel like men only want unattractive women and would never want to marry a pretty woman. yes I am miserable but I'm not a bully, I am the one who is bullied. I feel like I need to just gain weight then I'll finally get married. I really do hate myself.

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