I know I'm not getting married one day, and I'm content with that.

I know I'm not getting married one day, and I'm content with that.

There are a lot of people that don't seem to TRULY understand what marriage is all about. If they do say they do, then they are lying or in denial. If you really think about it, the majority of people come from broken up marriages or relationships nowdays. Many people are only after the flesh, and that is NOT something true and pure marriage works with. People don't work out their problems like marriage requires. They make divorce a first resort, not a last. And for those who are wealthy, the marriage usually is a sham from the start because one of the two is greedy and only after that other person's money. Marriage certainly isn't what it used to be. Granted, there were bad marriages before. But not as bad as it is now. Everyone marries and divorces each other. It's like we are all married and one big "happy" rednecked/hillbillied family. Think about it. Do you really want to have sex with someone who had sex with one of your siblings or even your parents? I don't know about you, but I find that incredibly disgusting. Just because you are in a relationship with someone, doesn't mean that you should have sex with them. Most of society is full of crap, and if you don't realize or see that, then that's certainly a problem. Surely, most of that crap comes from certain douchebags that consider them "authority" - you know I'm talking about you. They are the ones that preach this nonsense. After all, look at all the reality TV shows about people sleeping with each other. They are trying to influence you to do the same so that they can brainwash you.

Both of my grandparents stayed married, maternal and paternal, (60+ years) until they died. They did not cheat on each other. My parents are still married and still going strong after 40+ years. They are very happy with themselves and with their family. They STILL have no means of slowing down. They are going all the way to the end zone together, and that's just awesome!!! I understand not everyone's parents are in the same boat. But maybe we can turn this around. After all, just because your parents drank alcohol doesn't mean you have to. Just because your parents did drugs or killed someone doesn't mean you have to. Sadly, some parents are not great role models. In fact, they aren't role models. But it's not too late. You can turn this around with your kids and grandkids. You still have your moral compass to guide you. If it's broken, find someone who can help you. I know in this sad world, trust is very, very hard to find. But until we turn this around, this world will continue to become more of a cesspool than anything else. We need to stop listening to crap, and start listening to common sense. This world seems to be suffering horribly with a drought of common sense. We need to renew that. We need to recycle that, so that we can clean up our world one day, one person, one issue at a time. We need to start treating each other with respect, and shut out those who are guiding us down the "dark alley of the world". We need to help each other so that life will improve for everyone.


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What Girls Said 9

  • This is a good myTake for a few reasons, you focus a lot on the hope for values. A lot of people don't have them anymore, and most couples are settling for less: a spouse that is incompatible or a situation that pressured marriage too soon (ie. an unwanted pregnancy). I especially love this line at the end:
    "We need to start treating each other with respect, and shut out those who are guiding us down the "dark alley of the world". We need to help each other so that life will improve for everyone."
    No argument from me here.

    But please don't tar us all with the same brush with:
    "There are a lot of people that don't seem to TRULY understand what marriage is all about. If they do say they do, then they are lying or in denial."
    I waited nearly forty years to *not* make a rash mistake based on animal lust and financial gain. I waited for a partner who I felt so completely connected with it went beyond love. So yes, there are some people who do know what marriage is all about, and it goes beyond the day in the white dress. (In my case it was elopement.)

    Both my husband and I come from two families were marriage worked til the end and accepting the odd hiccup in the marriage meant you worked things out. I am happy and very fortunate that I learned from the best: my own mom and dad.

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  • You're looking back with colored glasses. Marriages have always been diverse as the people in them. I've read a lot of historic primary sources. Marital affairs, spousal abuse, drug and alcohol misuse, simply not communicating well - none of these things are new at all.

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  • Confusing take, I don't agree with what you said that "just because your in a relationship with someone doesn't mean you should have sex with them", like why the fuck would i be dating them if i didn't want to have sex with them? lol

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    • I think he meant in terms of feeling pressured to have sex just because you're in a relationship. Even though you're in a relationship, you should be able to take the time you need in order to feel ready.

    • I hope so cuz I need sex in a relationship with someone I love!! lol

  • The title you chose doesn't match with the mytake at all, so you did it this way to get lots of people to look and read it?

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    • I'm not sure how you don't see it match.

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    • What does slavery have to do with marriage?

    • I agree with CandyandPinkCats, the first paragraph does but the second kinda trails off into how parents aren't great role models. I was expecting more of a lecture on how marriage (from a guys perspective) doesn't benefit men at all lol

  • Good for you mr.

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  • I'm not sure I understand your take. Mostly, I get that you think marriage is good and divorce is bad. Why? And what does sex have to do with anything?

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    • Why is marriage good and divorce bad? Is that what your asking? I'm not necessarily saying sex is bad. In fact, sex is needed to create children. I'm saying lust is bad. Lust is sexual desire of the flesh.

    • Hi, thanks for responding. I didn't think you were saying sex was bad, but I got confused reading your first paragraph since sex came right after your statement that "everyone marries and divorces each other". Yes, I'd like to understand your reasons for thinking that marriage is good and divorce is bad. Are they inherently bad, or is it just bad when people marry and then get divorced quickly because they are not putting enough effort into the relationship?

    • Marriage is bad if both people in the relationship don't take the time to work out any issues and get to know each other. But marriage should be good. I don't know, but it seems to me that a lot of people that marry and divorce make marriages a sham, almost mocking it.

  • OMG FINALLY !! SOME SENSE ON THIS SITE !

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  • I heavily disagree with your conservative view towards sex and relationships. Sex and relationships are not permanent things. They do not destroy a person's life, there is such a thing as protection. However, people should be more careful who they enter a marriage contract with.

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    • You completely missed my MyTake. Lust (which is sexual thoughts) DOES destroy a person's life and those around them. You cannot deny that. If you do, then you are rather naive. Relationships should be permanent, but people don't work at them. They don't tend to improve them. That's part of the problem.

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    • What's the point of being in a relationship where your romantic and sexual needs don't get fulfilled? That only brews misery and contempt. Better to leave a relationship than waste your time in it.

    • You can be in a relationship without having romantic or sexual needs. I'm sure it's not very common, but it's still possible. Like I said, if it's not working out, then it's not working out. But don't get married unless you absolutely know that you two are perfect for each other. Once again, I'm mostly talking about marriage. A lot of people rush into marriage without even giving it a single thought.

  • Plot twist: your mum finds out her beloved husband has been cheating on her since their first year of marriage.

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    • There is no plot twist.

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    • "I'd rather be boring than a cheating asshole."

    • Whatever.

What Guys Said 5

  • So you're one of those religious people who are in denial about the history of marriage. Marriage was initially a legal contract for the purpose of money and "owning" a woman. Nothing more.

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    • Exactly. And if the legal benefits weren't there, no one would be getting married today. But everyone pretends that some big emotional reason or commitment is why they chose to get married.

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    • How 'bout this: 1 - 1 = 0

      Do you know math? Does that help? Is that enough logic for you? With kids in the mix, that makes it bad. If you STILL fail to see the logic, then I guess that's all I can do. I have nothing to say anymore.

    • What does math have to do with anything? Why is divorce bad? You don't seem to understand what presenting logic is.
      Why is it bad?

  • My parents have been married 20 plus years.

    I enjoy sipping on 15 year old scotch with my dad while talking about how messed up everything is today.

    I enjoy a beer or glass of wine with my meals. Does that make me bad person? I hope not lol.

    Its sad that marriage in this day and age is not valued...

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  • Nah its ok. Some of us actually like to drink a lot, sleep around a lot and do what we want with no regrets. This is the 21 century, lets all just do what we want without telling others what to do or judgeach other. One thing i agreed with you though is do not get married. Getting married is like telling people you give up. This is the best person i can match up with thats why divorce is so high because people know there are better things out there and dont want to miss out. They were just dumb enough to get married. Well, thats it folks.

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    • No, it's not okay. The fact that you like to drink a lot and sleep around is very concerning. Alcohol causes more problems than it solves. I wouldn't have to tell you what to do if you were smart enough. Getting married doesn't mean giving up. Getting married is bonding with that special someone as one. Whoever told you such is brainwashing you into crap.

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    • What does my age have to do with anything. You think that because im 19 i can't drink. My dad buys me drinks, my friends parents do it too. About having sex, girls are easy in my town. Look up the pregnancy rate of pueblo co, do you really beleive i didn't do all those things.

    • @LiveFreeorDieHard - just because your dad or your friends' parents buy you drinks doesn't make him or them a good role model. If your dad killed somebody, would you help him by digging a grave and hiding the body? Same thing with accepting alcohol underage. You could always tell him no, especially now that you are legally a man. Of course, I wonder if you are a man if you can't say no. I've told my parents no when it warrants it. Parents aren't perfect, but they do try their best - at least the good parents anyways.

  • I concurr. we have become very decadent believeing that because we have sexual desires we should follow through with them without fear of consequences. Its sickening really.

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  • If you think the majority of people come from broken marriages, you're wrong. And lots of these divorces started with a marriage that was out of wedlock or that happened too soon after starting to date their partner.

    38.media.tumblr.com/...lvo1baZqAj1r3l0gmo1_500.gif

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    • If I'm not mistaken, I consider marriage out of wedlock to be a broken marriage. It was doomed from the start of the relationship - at least when it started to go wrong.

    • Yes, but I was saying that many of the broken marriages were caused by some stupid lack of reasoning on the couple's part at some point in the relationship.

    • Um... yeah. Sorry if I seemed to have forgotten that in my MyTake. Although, I'm pretty sure that was implied above.

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