Engaged and flirting! Sign of possibly being with the wrong guy?

Ladies, if you were engaged to Mr. Right, would you flirt with other guys?

My assumption is that most women who were happy with their guy, would not flirt or do anything to jeopardize the engaged relationship. Am I correct?

So, the only reason a woman would flirt is because she was unhappy with something in the engaged relationship. Am I wrong?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think this really depends on the person. Some girls enjoy or need a lot of attention, especially if her significant other doesn't give the attention she feels she needs. Which may not mean she's not happy or doesn't love him, but that she feels inferior for some reason. If it's innocent enough and not taken out of context then I wouldn't make it a cause for concern. On the other hand, if its done intentionally in front of a man to cause jealousy that is a whole other issue. I would say you have to weigh what you know of the person and weigh their actions and decide if its innocent or not.

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    • I agree. I guess I'm agreeing because it falls in line with my situation. I had no intention of being involved with a 21 year old engaged woman. She and I work in the same mall. She asked me out to lunch one day, brought a menu from a restaurant at the food court(which we all know the menu's are above the counter's at the food court), turned her back closely to me as to have me look over her shoulder to read the menu. I thought that it was beyond being friendly, and so I confronted her.

What Girls Said 7

  • Hmmm, I think sometimes flirting is just something women do for fun, not because they are unhappy in their relationships. I am with my Mr. Right, but sometimes when I go out to a bar with my girl friends, I might do a tad bit of flirting.

    I would never take it too far and nothing would ever come of it. I don't really see any issue with smiling at a guy that I will never see again when I am out. I love my fiance and would never let anything happen to ruin that. Flirting is just something random and fun when you are out with friends.

    I would never do it in front of my fiance and I am not saying that this happens on a regular basis, but every now and then I may catch myself doing a little flirting and I see no harm in it. I mean, hello... guys can see the engagement ring on my finer and know they don't have a chance.

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    • I guess it sounds a little hypocritical to say that you've found Mr. Right and yet you're hanging out at the bar smiling at guys and giving them the wrong impression. I guess if you've found Mr. Right, you should be hanging out with him. Hanging with friends is cool, but in a bar?

    • I do hang out with him. But on some nights he has his guys night and on some I have my girls night. I don't know what he does when he goes out to bars, but I trust him just as he trusts me. I really don't see anything hypocritical at all. But then again, you and I have different opinions.

    • Agree to disagree. :) Thanks!

  • Some women are just naturally flirtatious, and can be flirty without even realizing it. So it doesn't necessarily mean she's unhappy in the relationship, but just that her personality is a flirty one. I would see how she behaves around other guys to see if she's just generally flirty or if she's flirting with one specific person. Also note how she behaves around other guys if her boyfriend is present. If she still acts kind of flirty, then it's just the way she is and not a reflection of the state of her relationship.

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    • So you think that it is alright for a girl or woman to flirt although she is engaged to Mr. Right?

    • I think what matters is whether her fiance is okay with it. Your original question is whether it was a sign she was with the wrong guy, and I don't think it necessarily is. And flirting isn't necessarily an indication of interest. I might flirt with a cop to get out of a ticket but that doesn't mean I would date or have sex with him! But if her fiance is not okay with the behavior, he needs to tell her to stop, and she needs to try her hardest to do so.

  • If you love the person that you are with than there should be absolutely NO WAY that you are flirting with other people. I never do anything that I wouldn't do with my boyfriend sitting right next to me. It is kind of a respect thing to me though. I respect him and I don't want him having to worry or anything. Because there is absolutely nothing to worry about!

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  • It doesn't mean she's with the wrong guy. Alot of women flirt as a way to build their self-esteem. It's not necessarily a bad thing, as long as you don't go any further than innocent flirting. Odds are Mr.Right might still flirt a bit with other girls too. There isn't really anything wrong as long as no one gets hurt, and you stop at flirting.

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  • Well I guess your not really wrong but not really right. If I had a perfect boyfriend, one who I who I was obvious in love with but sometimes he didn't always show me as much attention id like or maybe flirt with other girls.. I would definitely flirt with other guys, but nothing against my boyfriend really, just that I felt the need for his attention. but that's just me, some girls may be unhappy with something.. but if anything you could just ask her why she's acting that way and if its because somethings bothering her, she'll most likely tell you.

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  • It depends.

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  • Yes, I think your right about jeopardizing the relationship. But maybe this mr. Right, isn't the mr. Right for you. My personal opinion is that he must be doing something not necessarily wrong, but something to turn you off. All little girls have dreams of having the perfect house with the perfect husband and children, but in real life most of those times, things aren't perfect. And its okay to be attracted to a different guy, because he will benefit you better later in life.

    Sincerely

    ?

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What Guys Said 2

  • I've read recently that some women who are about to get married do tend to flirt a little more often before the big day. It has something to do with making sure they really are attractive and is about confidence. Just as men get the cold feet, women may over-question their attractiveness, and behave in ways they may normally not act.

    If that was the case, I would much prefer someone I was engaged to get it out of her system instead of flirting while we were married. The best thing to do is talk to her about it. If you are planning on getting married, it would be a HUGE step in the wrong direction not to communicate from the beginning.

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  • Some guys flirt with girls when they are hooked up with "ms. Right". I wouldn't take it too personally, personally. Just talk to her about it, if she understands, good. If she says something like "Oh your just being stupid" or something along those lines, disagreeing with you and going against your feelings, then there is a problem, talk deeper about it =P.

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