Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You

Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You

I will start with a story about my own personal experience. I met a guy, we fell in love - or at least I thought so, then he broke my heart. A simple and very shortened version of this so typical love story.

I knew he was the one who did wrong, but yet somehow I always came up with ideas about what I should have done different. It was bad and stupid. I just couldn't help the feeling that I knew he couldn't mean to hurt me that bad! He couldn't, he loved me, I felt it and he also told me he knew there was a special connection between us.

Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You

The guy told me all these things because he wanted to be held, he was never loved in his past. He was never really evil, but he wasn't good for me either. He always hurt me. Not physically but mentally. Yet I understood him too well. I understand him still somehow. He never lets me fully go. But he never lets me very close.

Now when I want to move on, I just can't. I want to but ni matter how strong I stay how long I wait, the feelings stays.

People always tell us "time heals!", I always thought it does. I believed them, because time always had done its' job. Now I haven't felt any help in time passing by, me doing things I love, being with close people and new people. None of these he along things helps. I am dissapointed. And we are talking about years - and tears - now.

Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You

Life is often dissapointing, so it isn't anything new. But I thought that you could get over these dissapointments. Sometimes I think I am over him, but more often not.

I have read about people who still miss and love their ex after ten years, why? What is the point of longing for someone that is clearly not coming back? Maybe the problem with this guy I love is that he always tries to come back. And I would want to welcome him, if he just made more effort to stay.

Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You

I think people should realize they are happy even when they are alone. I have realized it myself. I thought it would help me in this situation. Maybe one morning I will wake up and realize I really don't even want him anymore because I am happy now and he never made me happy more than temporary.

Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You

The only thing that helps you move on, is to not even try to let go. To realize life goes on even if your heart belongs to someone that left you. To just pull yourself together and smile like a rebel. Because you aren't healed but you still know how to live.

Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You

Time doesn't heal, you just get stronger.

Time Heals, Does It? Nope, It's You
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Most Helpful Girl

  • molls_
    I understand how you feel honesty because i felt the same way for a few years. I cried myself to sleep for months, no matter how much i tried to get over it i couldn't. I remember i tried to ignore my feelings and just focus on working 40+ hours a week, pushing 12 hours days, 6days a week, i tried everything to avoid dealing with the reality of the breakup. I tried dating, drinking to numb the pain, find comfort in a strangers arm but it all blew up on me at the end.

    I entered a depression.
    I tried to hide it as much as possible, hid my feelings, acted like everything was fine while i tore up on the inside. It took me years to work to those kinks, i worked on me and slowly repaired my self esteem. I stayed busy. i created small goals to achieve and like the saying goes" time heals every wound,". Meanwhile time is passing and we are living, exploring, getting to know each other all over again, we discover who we are now, the new us, and we learn that we have become stronger from all the hurt.
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Guy

  • serious
    "Time heals all wounds"

    Well even I don't believe in that sentence 100%, some part of the sentence may be true, but I what I think is time may heal your wounds but the scars will still be left, it may fade with time but will never really go away completely.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      Yeah, but I am thinking it is not the time it self. It is the things you do on that time that makes the difference.

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • Stacyzee
    It's definitely a cliche quote.

    The thing is that quotes apply to some people. It's never a true for all. It would be merely impossible.

    But I really hope eventually you do get over the hurt you are feeling , you deserve happiness.
    • Anonymous

      Thank you for your kind words. :)

  • Lostsoulman
    "Stop trying, He is happy without you"

    I call b. s on that line...

    I know my ex, I saw my ex... I love her... But last time I saw her, I started laughing with my friends, ignored her and she saw...

    She probrally thinks that above... but I still have a lot of feelings for her, she really hurt me... I wish she would make an effort to say sorry and try to talk to me... So you never really know what is actually going on in someones mind
    • Anonymous

      I know, you are right. This doesn't apply to everyone, but for those who have been hurt.
      I am hurt and I never got an apology, he never really tried.
      There is always that moment when we meet somewhere when we both have just stare at each other and wonder what to do/say. He always waves at me first and starts talking about stuff that really doesn't even mean anything. Then the moment passes and I try to walk away.
      It still hurts, you know, to look at him and try to just act normal. I gave already given up on the feelings but nothing really changes.

    • Yes It doesn't apply in all cases...

      I kinda feel the same way as you...

      If she just made one effort to try, one effort to try and apologize or even just try to be honest and talking to me... I would talk to her...

      Otherwise I feel like she doesn't care enough about me... So I shouldn't care about her either...

      I have to see her quite often as well, almost everyday...

      We used to talk so much... then it was just a "good morning" with deep eye contact... and now we don't look or talk to each other at all... I have thought about just spilling my guts, but I get really anxious and feel like there is no point...

      It's been over a year, and my heart still hearts and aches everyday... I try to be strong, "move on", "Let time heal" but it's true... That's all a lie...

      Maybe I might meet another girl one day who makes me forget about her, I think that's the only way... and it feels like that won't happen soon...

    • Anonymous

      Hey, I have been through this process a few times with this guy. "He just never learns!" I thought... but the truth is: I didn't.
      Now I have seen it and accept the fact that some people aren't good for you. Like: he was good for me the small time he made the effort and made it sound like everything was great and we were gonna marry and shit. But when he suddenly turned his back and told me he could never be in a serious relationship, then the pain began.

      I went through this a few times and it took three years of my life. But now I finally see light in the end of the tunnel; I still have those feelings, yeah, but I am happy. I see potential in other guys and I don't think about him 24/7 with my heart aching.
      The only thing that has helped is probably facing the truth, walking past him without saying anything... just realizing the feelings for him was real from my side and they were good... but that those moments and feelings are in the past and you can take it as a good memory.

    • Show All
  • lovely_girl
    Thank you so much for making this post! Finally someone tells it how people really see / feel it. Time doesn't really heal... it just keeps going. :)
    • Anonymous

      I'm glad to hear you liked it! 😊👍

  • Pedro_N
    Na mouche! We can't run a clock when it keeps going counterclockwise. The best way is indeed to work on yourself and go out and try new things like you stated.

    Good take :)
  • thomas444
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    contact him igbajesolutionpalace@gmail. com
  • mingming
    Time can change a person, a life without a destination
    • Anonymous

      That again is not time it self it is the progress you make. That is you who do what you need to do. Nothing to do with how much time passed doing it.

  • Anonymous
    I loved him. I asked, what if I'm falling for you. He didn't say it back more like why can't we just keep talking?
    I lost like 25 pounds and just a heartbroken person my heart aches, I tested the hell out of my eyes... Music was stupid as fuck... Had to go to 70 or 80, s more stupid love. I literally have betray on my face and everyone noticed they didn't even know he was my secret. One last thing I slept for days months... Woke up blurred out. 160 days later counting still. But I am healed. The scars are there little but scars and go away... I shall pass this memory one day. ... Sigh
    • Anonymous

      basically , it's no use draining my self aha aha aha really there al more good looking bad men out there but so charming aha. Why I never go back to him cause there's literally shit written all of the walls and mirrors cracked

    • Anonymous

      Oh, I understand :( I hate men who do this. Today I just got a shitty text from the guy who has messed me all over again, now I am sure I am done with him. He is pure evil. I can't even cry anymore. I'll block him everywhere from now on.

    • Anonymous

      O no. You must DND or block. I did took hard week but he knows he gots you ain't that a terrible feelings? You will be okay!!! Please do not see him he might just flip you off I seen it once happen to my good girl she was broken also but happy and her self. They didn't date lo now I hear his nuts burn and penis. May I ask you what he said to you evil?

    • Show All