Can I get my ex girlfriend back?

[Anonymous]

i been dating this my ex girlfriend for over 3 month but I use to treat her bad that was she use to tell me , then she left me for a week I tried hard to get back with her again and I took her out for dinner and bought her a nice flowers , and I told her that I'm sorry if I was a bad person and I promised her to change because I really do love her, I can see her love for me in her eyes, she agreed and she told me she need a week to think about it but she is not sure that she can be back with me because she is hurt , I hug her before I left and when I was leaving she grab me and when I asked her why she did that she said I wanted to kiss you so bad and I don't want you to leave. 4 days later she text me saying "you really need to move on and just forget about me. you deserve a good girl who is going to love you and give you everything. I'm not the one" now it been over a week I never TEXT her or contacted her ... what I need to do I'm lost ?

[Tigerlily]

Well firstly, I've been this girl. I was with my ex for a year and he messed me around, took me as he wanted me, left me, then when he realised he really loved me or whatever, he tried to make it up to me by doing one nice thing like bringing me flowers or apologising. The thing is, the flowers make no difference because it's the BEHAVIOUR that hurts. How have you been treating her badly? Whatever it is, flowers can't erase that. Flowers are great but only if they really mean something, and what a lot of guys do is give us flowers or treat us nice for one day or just a little while, just so that they can earn our trust back again, and when they know they've won, they do the same bad stuff all over again.

She knows this. She wants you, but only if you're going to treat her right. But she knows that all this promising that you'll treat her right means nothing. The problem is, you've ruined things by treating her badly in the past, and now she knows that's what you're like. You may be able to get her back, but if you do, you'll have to take it slow and do things at her pace. You're in the doghouse here, you're the one that treated her bad, so you gotta make up for it.

The thing is, it's not just about being on your best behaviour - it's about being the best person you can be, so that you'll always treat her right, not just when she's angry and you need to make things up to her. See if she's willing to start again, with a clean slate, start from the beginning and give things another try. But you have to do it right this time, because if you screw up, it'll be the last time and you'll probably lose her for good.

[MrTinker]

The first thing you need to do is come to terms with yourself and find out what you did wrong, the second straight yourself out and become a man; then strive to her her back, respect, and never hit or treat her badly. Sometimes we don't as men understand how we are treating a woman badly, and some times it's them who are wrong. We have to realize which it is and work on both ends making compromises from each-other but keep the love strong and bonds in the relationship.

Do your best to be a gentle-man as few are really in this day and age; don't make her love you - let her love you. Women have their own way of showing love that can at times be different from a mans. She might beat you senseless, and that might be here way, it's up to how you understand it.

I with you the best of luck and cheers mate. Never strive for pain, only the moonlit sky.

[UnknownFox]

It sounds like after that night she looked back and decided its not worth the risk of being hurt again and that she doesn't want to actually get back, feelings were high that night but now that she's had time to think she has made her choice.

People will always remember the bad things a person did to them and if you were bad enough for her to have left you, she may have thought of that and figured its best she not give it another try.

[Asker]

She also said maybe if you would have been like this to me at the very beginnign evething would be different. its just too late my hear is f***ed.

can I get her back I really love her ?

[UnknownFox]

Well from what you just said, not right now.

Perhaps later down the road if you can just be kind to her and treat her right (as friends and not trying to pressure back to dating) then their may be a chance but just know that she's made up her mind already and may or may not be willing to change that.

Though I do agree with her, if you had been kind to her in the first place.

[JustMe2]

just continue being a friend man, she can see your changes then, its a little soon to be asking her back into something so serious, let her get a feel for ya, if she still has feelings, and sees you are strong about the whole situation, then she will come back to you buddy.

[nyg718]

be friends and just be their , donmt talk of relationship. make her fall in love with you again

[bigroo2big]

just chat don't make it look like you want a realitionship again and sooner or later it might work out for you 2

best of luck to you