How can I get my ex girlfriend back?

[Mikeythom]

My ex and I split in January. Her reason she was not ready for a serious relationship. Prior to me, she was with her ex for 13 years, married for 5. He cheated on her the whole time and that did some deep damage to her. A year after we started dating. Things got serious quick with us, she said she loved me 4 weeks into dating. We talked about moving in together, etc. After the new year, she asked if we could slow down because they were moving to fast. I agreed at first, but my insecurities took over, I got clingy and needy saying I didn’t want slow it down. She then left me. After the breakup she said she still loved me, and cared about me and wanted to stay in contact. March rolls around, and we started hanging out again, we live 4 hours apart, I was working in her area in March. She had asked me to drop off her apartment key to her. That night I went to her place, we talked for a bit, and ended up hooking up that night. she told me how much she missed me, and how sorry she was. We continued to talk and see each other till the end of April. Going on date nights, hiking, taking pictures together, cuddling, holding hands on car rides, etc. She would tell me how attracted she was to me, and how good I made her feel. How much she misses me and thought about me all the time, etc. At the end of April, I asked her to be my girlfriend again. She freaked out, saying she didn’t want a commitment or anything serious and that what we were doing those two months was only friends with benefits to her. Through the month of May, I begged a little and tried to use logic about what we had, what we were doing meant more than just friends with benefits. Her sister told me she’s still really messed up from her divorce. I pushed to hard to get her back, now she has me blocked on everything. We haven’t talked in a month. I know she needs time and space, she has a lot of damage from her past. We were crazy about each other, got matching tattoos (her idea). What can I do to get her back?

[Interstate]

If she has you blocked... in most cases the damage has been done, and I wouldn't press it anymore. And the fact that she said those two months for her were a "friends with benefits" condition, for me would be a deal breaker. I would say not to talk to me again. Friends with benefits does nothing but allow two people to USE each other whenever they need them. Basically the same as a drive-thru window service!!

Dude, you need to let things happen NATURALLY. Don't PUSH or INSIST. What is acceptable is to express how you feel to her, and that will give her something to work with. The next time you speak to her Sister, it would be advised to ask her to pass along an apology and say you let things between the two of you for those two months get to your head. THEN LET IT GO!!! If out of some slither of a chance she unblocks you and rings your doorbell (so-to-speak), be COOL, CALM and COLLECTED. Be the complete OPPOSITE of the Office Space your emotions went!!!

But in the meantime... just move on with life.

[Mikeythom]

That’s the thing tho, it was definitely more than friends with benefits. Friends with benefits don’t do the things we did. Or say the things she said. Actions speak louder than words.

[Interstate]

Considering too, there is the possibility (as Jennifer_Bloom stated), she just needed an orgasm, AND YOU WERE THE MOST FAMILIAR. And the fact that she blocked you could mean she got what she wanted from you and you are no longer needed. Women say how they get used by guys for sex and this and that, when they are just as guilty (the ones who have behaved this way). They need to stop and realize they are no exception to the rule.

[OlderAndWiser]

1. "she said she loved me 4 weeks into dating." That is the sign that you were a rebound. . . if you didn't already realize that.

2. "She had asked me to drop off her apartment key to her." She is ready to say goodbye forever.

3. "and ended up hooking up that night" Sex doesn't make a relationship. She wanted to get laid.

4. "At the end of April, I asked her to be my girlfriend again. She freaked out, saying she didn’t want a commitment or anything serious." Dude, when she said she wasn't ready for a relationship, she was telling you the truth.

5. "Through the month of May, I begged a little" Not only do you refuse to accept the reality of this failed rebound, but you have lost your self-respect and sank to the level of pathetic. DUDE!!! Be a MAN!

[jennifer_bloom]

She is using you for sex and probably never divorced in the first place and may never have been cheated on either,

[Mikeythom]

She was cheated on, her ex husband confessed everything to her and is now dating the girl he was cheating with. She went to therapy multiple times over it.

[mortonc57]

Many years ago I was in exactly the same boat, down to the matching tattoos. I wish I could give you a good answer, but we never reconnected and I moved on. I heard she got married and then divorced, but I don't really know.

You could keep chasing her, but be prepared for dead-end after dead-end.

My only regret is letting her chose the placement, size and color of the tattoos... she got hers about the size of a quarter above the bikini line.

Looking back, I think the whole tattoo thing was a prank, thinking I wouldn't go through with it and using that as an excuse that "I didn't love her". She broke up with me anyway, and I got the other arm done to show her my commitment to "us".

Turns out, there was no "us".

ah well, live and learn... good luck !

[Mikeythom]

It sucks man. Just a month and a half ago I was getting every sign from her, the I miss you texts, planning things in the future together, she’d text me to come over and cuddle, I was hanging out with her son again who loves me. To all of a sudden blocked on everything because I wanted to be official again. And pushed for it. She told me she is scared of commitment, but damn, why do all those things with someone and not wanna commit? Her sister is friends with my sister, and she said she’s still messed up from her divorce and stuff. I know that’s a huge factor in it all. Just wish there was something I could do to help her open up to me again.

[Anonymous]

Just move on. Yes it is easy to say, it took me years to move on after my last one...

She probably used you for bedroom fun only and got too attached, but you were only to not be alone, if that makes sense. She probably back with her 'ex', that was never ex just temporary not present.

Do not use drugs, alcohol or anything of that sort as solution, it will only delay it not sort it. This did not helped me.

Stop trying to get her back, just find someone else to enjoy your life, she is not for you.

Good luck.

[Mikeythom]

Her ex is living with the girl he cheated on her with, they’re engaged too. I know she despises him. So it’s highly unlikely she’d go back to that. All her friends and family hate the guy too.

[Opinion Owner]

Ok, she could have found another one, you will be last to know.
Or even she been with, that 3rd person while you been with her.

Just move on she does not think of you as value boyfriend.

That, everyone around her do not like him, means nothing. Women like 'bad boys' and never admit it, it is subconscious for them...

Just move on.

[StunningANDbrave]

Wow dude what the fuck are you doing? To make this short and get to the point you failed her competency tests and and lost frame of the relationship which led to this happening. You are much better off chatting up new women then doing the work to fix this.

[Scotte1us]

Take my advice and move on , there are many nice girls out there better then her , you can fall in law many times , trust me, she is still probably sleeping with x boyfriend you just have to let it go , who knows she might come back , but dont be pushy or you lose her permenantly

[Mikeythom]

She’s not sleeping with her ex, he’s now living with and engaged to the girl he was cheating on her for years with. She despises him, and her family and friends all hate him. But she is definitely still emotionally messed up from it, 13 years with the guy, and he cheated on her the whole time. That can do some heavy damage to someone.

[Overmind]

Shake that daze off & show her you have options; if you do & she gets mad there's still a spark you can fan into a blaze, if not it's over.

[Mikeythom]

She got extremely jealous after the breakup when I posted a pic on IG with a female friend, and then showed a lot of other jealously during those two months we hung out over small things. That to me showed she still cared. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t have got so jealous and defensive.

[FalconTakanashi]

Just don't try. Move on, enjoy life, and a woman who loves YOU for YOU will one day show her face.

[Avicenna]

honestly, it's not going to happen. Meet other women.

[kitkills]

That's a rather unintelligent and irrevocably stupid pursuit. They're over it, it's time for you to get over it too like every ex.

[Whtevernever]

You can't. You pushed too hard and that's the end. Let the woman be.

[Mikeythom]

I didn’t even push that hard is the thing, I didn’t beg, or call or a million times. In fact I didn’t call her once. Might have sent about 6 texts that were positive, told her I understand her past and how that plays a factor, I apologized for the few post break up mistakes I made, after telling her that I understand her reasons, and that obviously I was still hurt, she blocked me.

[Whtevernever]

That's literally pushing too hard. Game over. Leave her be.

[Iron_Man]

Call her sweet talk her and invite her out to a five-star meal along with 12 red roses And wine

[Mikeythom]

Did that in April. We went out for dinner, laughed all night. Had a great time. Had sex after dinner.

[Anonymous]

You can't. You were just rebound. Trust me when I say this, she's hooking up with other guys besides you.

[Mikeythom]

I know I was the rebound. I felt that for awhile now. But we definitely fell hard for each other. I’m only the 3rd guy she’s ever been with, she’s also terrified to hook up with people because of an unfortunate STI infection she got from someone one time, she was very timid to even sleep with me for the longest time. So it’s highly unlikely she’s out hooking up with random dudes.

[Anonymous]

she never loved you to being with

look into MGTOW