I've been in A situation for over 3 years now, im in love with the guy but he has a girlfriend & child.
We started off as just friends then one thing led to another and it became sexual. Its been on and off and its come to the point i do not know what to do, i tried millions of times to cut him off or just remain friends but somehow we always end up back in the affair. Now i love him to bits and really would prefer to just being friends as he has a family but how do you get someone who constantly says he loves you but just can't give you the relationship you want to just be friends so we can continue to be in each others lives.
Especially as his girlfriend knows about me, just don't know the extent of our 'friendship' or just turning a blind eye to it.
Like its crazy because i was the innocent party in this, never knew about the family until he had a little melt down, he girlfriend was pregnant and he managed to fall in love with me. I didn't know what to do apart from run i. e why we have been going back and forth
But i really would like some advise on what to do
Most Helpful Guy
Once you knew that he had a girlfriend and she was pregnant with his child, and you stayed in a relationship with him, you were no longer an innocent party. Don' portray yourself as a victim; it will make the breakup more difficult.
You can't remain friends with him. A very few couples can make that work but most can't. Jealousy and desire will interfere and the only way to end it is no contact - 100% no communications in any form, no texting, no Facebook, nothing!
I wrote a take on how to break up and it has some practical suggestions for you: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a11588-some-practical-advice-for-how-to-break-up I hope you will read it and perhaps even leave a comment.2
Most Helpful Girl
This is a touchy situation... Although you didn't intentionally get yourself in it, you're still at partial fault. Love is a web. It's a twisted, dangerous, dangling web, and it can truly only handle two people. In this particular situation... He says he loves you. And he says he loves her. He has a child. It's ultimately not up to you, but HE needs to make a decision. And YOU need to stay away until he does. Either in your absence he will realize he wants you more than her, or realize that he's made a mistake in having this affair. Now I'm not saying you should up and disappear. I'm saying make your plan to leave until he decides clear and then go. It will be tough. Nerve racking even... But the situation won't go away and it won't get better... Until it is resolved. Good luck my dear :)1