So upset right now. I pushed him away and now he's with someone else. Crying?

[Anonymous]

I've been hurt several times. Last year I met an amazing guy who is everything I have ever wanted, talks to me every day, tells me that he loves me (even when I don't deserve it).

The thing is that I have been two timed, cheated on, abused (not in the physical sense though), ignored and dumped by previous boyfriends so of course he comes along and now I'm scared to let true love in even though it's the only thing that I have ever wanted. There has been another girl who has been after him for about as long as we've been together, and after our last fight which was about a month ago he started to pull away. He made a promise to me earlier this year that we were going to do something really special for my birthday (which was two weeks ago) and he didn't even call.

Today I saw him out and about... and holding hands with her. I went over and talked to him when she stepped away and asked him what was going on. He told me that even though he still loves me and not her, he can't be with someone who keeps pushing him away. He said he's not in love with her but she really wants him and he says he hopes that one day he will be in love with her the way he was with me, and he wished me the best. He said he pulled away because he was trying to figure out how to tell me without hurting me again. Then she comes back and tells me that I had my chance with him and to go away. I'm crying so hard right now.

I almost can't even believe that I'm going to ask this but should I give up hope of him ever coming back?

[Kapakani]

Hm, I'm sorry you find yourself here mate. It's a tough position to be in. Never apologize for guarding your heart and being selective who you trust with it. I see you guys got into an argument and thats kind of what drove him away... Is it something repeatedly you guys argued about?

Beyond that, I'm not gonna tell you to give up hope... If it's not causing you to physically or mentally contemplate destroying yourself, there nothing wrong with having hope that a love or past love returns. Despite you feeling now that you should've opened up to this guy, you should take into consideration his actions... look where he left you, with uncertainty and confusion, and alone on your b-day with hopes of a special outing with him, and yet you received silence.

so maybe some part of you pushed him away because he didn't completely seem to be someone you felt you should let in just yet...

hopefully things work out and get better for you mate :)

[red_knight]

Expectations are the true enemy in your story dear friend, I'm really sorry but I'm the same as you with 1 key difference...

Everyone is different, yes? If so fall head over heels every time you get a boyfriend, no matter how it ends let them all say that you truly knew how to love, let it be known that it wasn't you but them that was the problem then you'll start to realise that in the end that it hurts less, you'll find out that they hurt and regret it much more than you did.. =) stop crying okay.. better is on it's way just try implying my ad ice to the next relationship..

Should you need the proverbial shouldered free to inbox me. I'll listen.

[red_knight]

Advice* not ad ice°°°°°

[Asker]

It's fine, I know what you meant 😊

[red_knight]

Thank you..

[Kenni]

Yes. Sorry to tell you this and you probably know it but, you screwed up. You can't go around and treat every guy you meet like they're your exes, they all deserve a chance.
Don't worry, you'll move on. Eventually. Even though you don't believe it right now. I promise.

[Asker]

Thank you. You were honest but you were still nice about it.

[Kenni]

I'm sorry

[Blondie80]

Learning money is expensive. You must pay the prize to learn and improve... Just look at you! You are around 30 something and you haven't even been married yet!!! There are big and serious problems with you! If you go on with it, you are end up being a spinster...

[yousir]

If that's not the pot calling the kettle black... Way to kick someone when they're down. I think it's time you withdrew some of your own "learning money" and spend your time improving yourself rather than sniping people you don't know when they are most vulnerable in order to convince yourself you've got it all figured out.

[Asker]

There's big and serious problems with me? I'm sorry, but not all of us are lucky enough to meet the right guy early in life and marry young. You think I wanted to be my age and still single? You're obviously not that happy in your own marriage if you had to insult me like that. Keep up with that way of thinking and you'll be alone too.

[red_knight]

Ey blondie don't be a bitch, don't kick someone whose down ever!!!- bet you opened your legs to the first bitch boy that noticed the shitstain between your legs.. I can't believe what a duckfuck you are... Your mother mustve been traumatized after raising you poor her.. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[red_knight]

And shit head... It's price not prize..

[momo770]

U need 2 work on u. It's too late with the dude. Tc

[James_R_G]

If he pulled away without telling you and started seeing this other girl then I am thinking he's not as special as you think he is. Tell me how that's not cheating.

You've been hurt and your guard is way up, I understand you might have made things hard for him but his actions are his own and you are not responsible for them.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation but from what you have described he's actually being an asshole here. Really hope you are alright asap!

[Asker]

I'm fine, but thanks

[Kkaos]

Who knows. Just try to forget about it and move on. There's other people out there. You'll drive yourself crazy if you continually wonder if you still have a chance. Just try to forget about it and in the future try not to allow your previous negative experiences impact people who don't deserve it.

[Caaarl]

It's sad yeah but it's a hard lesson you need to learn. Trust is one of the most important things in a relationship. You need to learn to trust and love again. It's possible that later in the future that he'll come back but you won't be the same person as you are now. You need to pick yourself up and find someone who you want to trust one who earns it. And you will get it one day trust in yourself to find the waym

[rian13]

Even if he comes back then you shall know that you are his second or last option\choice. how can you let yourself so inferior

[Chanel1981]

How long were you seeing him?

[Asker]

Almost a year

[Chanel1981]

That's definitely tough. How long ago did you split?

[Asker]

He ghosted me at the beginning of this month

[Chanel1981]

That's really childish! Then you ran into him and he was nice? When did he start seeing this girl?

[Asker]

I don't know. Supposedly right after he ghosted

[Chanel1981]

I would just let it be. If it's meant to be he will come back and the timing seems awafully fishy

[boggboss]

Yes you should sorry he has moved on

[Chaz269]

Yes. It just wasn't meant to be.

[red_knight]

We control our own fate on the destiny that was played down for us... that way we cannot blame God for outcomes

[Anonymous]

It is too late anymore.

[GirlThatDraws]

That's your problem now