Do you think people derserve a second chance?

[RedBullRacingLemia]

Me and my ex would be celebrating 3 years on the 30th April unfourtinely at the start of the Pandemic she ghosted me and went offline causing our relationship to end.

Yes

No

Maybe

[CaptainOverthink]

Woah.. dude..
"At the start of the pandemic.."
Is that like 2019? That's 3 years ago.
"Would be celebrating 3 year anniversity.."
It doesn't sound like you had a relationship that was all that strong. I mean, I get that you could still be hung up and hurt about her (I too take a long time to let go of people).

But the way you said it, it sounds like you where both invested in eachother. But like if you where only together for a few months that sounds more like a fling or a least a trial-thing.
I know it's easier said than done but don't get emotionally invested in something so unproven, give it time.

Ghosting is harsh, I get that. To be left to wonder and ponder why.
I think it's just one of those things in modern life where we'll have to accept the things we've no control over or the things we'll just never know or understand. Like the mysteries of the universe. Maybe it's not all that relevant to dwell upon even though it hurts.

To awnser the question without context:
- Deserved second chances depends on the circumstances of losing the first chance.
- Depends on who they (the one wanting 2nd chance) are or how they are percieved to be as personal character.
- Also depends on how easily one or both get over or move on from the other (what options are you competing with?).

[exitseven]

So did she go dark because she found another guy or was she just suicidal or did she just need a break? Does she want to get back together?

[RedBullRacingLemia]

She just went offline without any prior warning and no the break was never menition.

[exitseven]

i woiuld want an explanation but I could give her a second chance.

[exitseven]

Thanks for the MHO😎

[globetrotter22]

I had someone do this to me years ago and it was horrible. I also think this sadly is only becoming a more common thing for women to do in modern society. If she respected him she wouldn’t of done that.

@redbullracinglemia Just remember that if she respected you she would of handled that differently or least reached back out to at some time while taking complete responsibility for being in the wrong. Without respect you have nothing. Even if you do somehow magically reunite with her she will most likely pull some bs again. Respect yourself and give her what she deserves: absolutely nothing.

[its_amelia_c]

Ghosting is pretty awful, and I don’t know if I could excuse it tbh. There is NO reason to ghost someone.


So unless she explained why she did it and it was a good excuse then maybe. But I’d find it extremely hard to trust that person again. That they wouldn’t do it to me again.


They’d have to be pretty special to me. They’d have to earn my trust again over a period of time. Show me that they really want this to work, that they care about me and want me.


But, still, I hate ghosting, it’s extremely cowardly. Hurtful. And says so much about a person.

[Seinna]

Depends on what they did and why... in the case you described, I wouldn't bother unless she has some vulnerable people in her family. Even then if it meant anything to her she'd keep contact with you over internet or phone...

[TruthBringer]

A second chance for what your "girlfriend" did? No. If a girl whom I am supposed to be in a relationship with ghosts me, then that's the end of the relationship. No exceptions. What makes you think she won't ghost you again? It also wouldn't strike me as a surprise if she tried to get with some other dude, but ended up getting back with you because it failed. Or she decided to keep you around longer as a placeholder before she jumps shit once again.

Sorry mate, but you're not in a relationship as you think you are. When a woman is truly into you, she wouldn't do stunts like that.

[globetrotter22]

I noticed quite a gender gap in male vs female opinions. Women are less forgiving. Maybe it’s easier for them because they have more options then men when all else is equal.

Anyway why did your ex ghost you? If you really didn’t do anything fundamentally wrong (cheat, abuse her, etc) then she absolutely deserves nothing from you except silence. I guess if she does reach out then you can tell her how shitty that was for closure. You can forgive her but that doesn’t mean reconnecting. However if you do go back then she will be emboldened to continue with her shitty behavior. Mark my words she will do something to hurt you again.

Women need to know there are consequences to their shitty behavior. They indulge more in this because too many guys enable them. Be tough and respect yourself.

[Kaamraj]

Just like all things in life, there is no black and white, it's all subjective. A person who has shown malice and malafide intent, meaning they have shown cunning, planning, and the intention and execution to harm someone emotionally, financially, etc. doesn't deserve a second chance.

[JustinTheGreat]

I voted maybe because it really depends what they did
if someone I was dating for 3 years all the sudden ghosted me, they would have to have a pretty good reason to why they did it for me to give another chance.

but if they ghosted simply because they were too afraid to express their feelings and break up like an adult, then I wouldn’t bother

[Kabluie]

It's really up to you, every situation is unique.

I remember shutting the door in a pretty deep relationship years ago because of lying, I have never been treated that way by anyone I ever dated seriously so why should I start now. Looking back, still a good decision to move on.

[TommyMountainFigure]

Unfortunately there is no generic answer to that question. Some people do and some don't. For me though, it depends on the relationship I have with them leading up to it.
Mostly, though yes I will give second chances.

[juniorJack]

Ghosted (ignored) you by going offline? Why didn’t you phone or texted her? Ask if she is ok?
I’m a postman and I know lots of people who weren’t ok! They just to start with needed to hear a voice someone human not a computer screen to talk to!

[RedBullRacingLemia]

I did message her via other mediums but never received a reply back.

[juniorJack]

Ok, move onto someone else, if you do manage to get back in contact tread carefully hope she is ok and her family is too, hope your well too

[Better_off_here]

for the most part people do, need a second chance.
i think that it is is up to the person too as far as what they want to do.
but maybe reach out another time and see what they are up to and see if they can talk with you too?
but i would not wait around too. it sucks when you're ghosted but it happens to us all sadly.

[PhenomenalQueen]

I lean more towards no, but it also depends on the reason.. I feel like ghosting is extremely immature.

[Rei02]

If you try but couldn't contact her after the moment she stopped, then she is not worth of your time.

[Tiptoetamm]

Some people are worth the second change some are not. Unless we ended things good I probably won't give a second chance.

[Sincerly_KittyCat]

Depends, however i am not giving an ex a second chance. They had a very long chance to know not to mess up.

[red324]

Not everyone gives out warnings though.

[Sincerly_KittyCat]

For things that are commom sense there is no need for warning.

[red324]

Well some girls just disappear out of nowhere no obvious reasons.

[Sincerly_KittyCat]

Its not hard to figure out your partners likes or dislikes if you pay attention to their words and actions. In pass conversations they would bring up topics randomly or not randomly of what makes them happy or what makes the uncormfortable. Its not hard.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

They might deserve a second chance with the second person for love.

But for you , your were the first choice then were left then coming back to you so choose wisely

[cookiecrusher]

Don't waste your time on a person who isn't as crazy about you as you are of them.

Sometimes it sucks to accept they don't like you back. However once you get the one that does it's like snorting cocaine, you will be hooked for life.

[red_knight]

Suree

If you're only thinking with your dick. 😂

They repeat the same shit or worse..

[Felinegirl]

Depends. In most situations I believe in second chances but not in third.

[Yucy_Gluttony]

Depending on the risks and what happned I give them more than two

[Moose304]

Situation specific of course, but generally I don't give 2nd chances.

[Valso]

Depends on the transgression, really. Being cheated on is something I can't forgive and never will. The same applies for physical and mental abuse.

[Djaay]

Lmao... seriously you'de want that back? Acually she did you a big favor.

[CuriousMufuxka]

Depending on the situation, yes. In yours.. Well it doesn't make much sense.

[cloud9vortex1234]

No, not for her. She didn't even offer a reason for why she broke up.

[admles]

Depends on what they did.

if they cheated, then no.

[Kangarus]

Depends on how far they went and why. I might not let them as close to me as what I did before though.

[JoyGirl]

Depends on how remorseful they are.

[Anonymous]

I think she derseves a second chance.

[globetrotter22]

Why so?

[HeartFullOfGlue]

Depends on what they did

[joeldalton]

ok. Well time to move on to someone hotter.

[jimmy2]

Sure none of us are perfect or without sin

[whistlingwh0res]

yeah when the get old and die

[Guy13]

COVID-19 KILLER…sure

[Guy13]

I’m assuming you all have met, engaged, kiss, and felt sparks. Online love affairs are difficult to say the least.

[Uptowngirl88]

Nope

[JesseJayNeak]

Never

[UpdateGloomyNights_]

Never never