Me and my ex broke up and my mom said he used me and it was not a relationship I found that to be rude how do I not let this bother me?

[Nicolemare7]

[caring__1]

It's not uncommon for those who care about us to give awkward attempts at soothing our loss when a relationship ends. They'll say the other person didn't deserve you, or there are other fish in the sea. They want to be supportive, yet end up stumbling over themselves. The main problem with their behavior is it makes it more difficult to move on. We can't accept the ex was so worthless, since we felt so deeply, so we feel a need to defend the ex rather than resolve the past and move on. The awkward attempts of our loved ones make it harder for us to learn from our experience and move forward.

[Nicolemare7]

I understand that, but you have to understand that I told my mom her ex used her a longtime ago which he did and I was just helping her move on, but instead she’s being Malicious and purposely trying to hurt me by saying that My ex used me which is not true which to me makes her wrong for saying that

[Nicolemare7]

It’s not from a place of care but more like revenge because she’s hurt

[caring__1]

You could be accurate, and she might be attempting to get even. Ask her to share the specific behaviors she observed, so you can see it through her eyes.

[EaterPeter]

That is your mom's view not yours. You may try to get better understanding but first you must self sooth

[EaterPeter]

If you let it bother you make something good out of it

[Thepumpkinhead]

Well don't mind what your mom said. It may be rude but he's an ex now. Doesn't matter what other people think. It's what you think.

Do you think he used you? If no, then you're good