Would you breakup with someone if they admitted they “almost cheated” on you?

Question

And if you were the one who almost cheated on them, would you confess to them or keep it to yourself? (See clips below for example) I have grown because there was a time I didn't breakup with an almost cheater. And there was a time i took back an actual cheater. But never again. And I’ve stuck to that. There was also a time I emotionally cheated and because I don’t do well with guilt, I told him. He was mad and hurt. But he forgave me. #FeelFreeToList #Confessions

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

No because I have done that as well , one thing I learned in relationships it’s best to be honest , we are only human so if they told me they almost cheated I would just question as to why and what occurred to make them go that direction , I will be hurt but if they were honest about it I would have a better chance of understanding what possessed them to go that direction , Most the time it’s just someone they found attractive or came off as someone that they felt had better qualities then you , basically a load of shit. Now if I found out that they were lying about the almost part and they really did cheat on me, then I would dump them for lying and stringing me along. Cheating to me is a selfish choice, so whether I cheat or they cheat the relationship is over , if someone can’t resist temptation for you like you do for them , then they truly don’t love you and you truly don’t love them , Cheating is never a mistake and if someone cheats on you and you find out , they will either point fingers at you or act like it was a mistake never taking accountability for their actions. Resisting temptation use to come natural to me when I was first getting into relationships , after being burned and betrayed and backstabbed by the girl I gave my heart to it changed my whole outlook on relationships so it became harder for me to resist temptation from other girls , because my trust for girls’ was broken , once I realized it was so wrong of me to do , I learned how to resist temptation again , sad but true , that something that use to come natural to me , I had to learn all over again , because we are all selfish people , when you learn how to remove selfishness for someone that’s where love grows and all we can do is hope they learned as well. If someone wants to live their life lying to your face about never cheating on you when really they did , they are just wasting their time living a lie , they will never be happy or content knowing they are a piece of shit holding in guilt , if you can hold in guilt that makes every word out of your mouth a lie to your partner and makes you a coward. So when I commit to a girl , I am giving her 100 percent of my trust if I can’t give her 100 percent , then I am not going to waste my time committing to her , What she chooses to do is on her , we can’t force someone to love us all we can do is treat them the same way we want to be loved in return , it won’t always be perfect , but I make her my top priority the same way she should do for me , if they choose to walk away , let them go , when they realize they were selfish and they fucked up they will more than likely try to come back to you , that’s when you tell them nope you had your chance and you blew it , I deserve someone that gives a 100 percent the same way I do , Good luck to you , I never take an ex back I do t care how good she was in bed or how good looking she is , if she walks away from me she is dirt
To me. Better yet dust in the wind lol

NathanDavis · Accepted Answer

let me put this way... and let's say that there are about 12 steps or stages to the cheating

and lets say that the step number 12 is actually cheating on me... because cheating just does not happen like that and for no reason

so, we would have to have talk about all of those... how far did you go? what where those steps about, and more importantly why... was it because of your lack of character, or was it because I failed somehow? was it because we both neglected something?

was it two or three steeps out of those twelve? or did you go all the way to the eleventh and then said "not worth" or whatever reasoning happened then

lilyanony1 · Accepted Answer

I almost never cheated on the guy I'm seeing as he'd been treating me poorly and I hadn't seen him for nearly a month.

Can I really say we're an item anymore?
Not really, I think I have made it clear that I don't really respect him, by doing that.

It wasn't my intention to insult him, but it was my intention to get his attention.
When you do things like this you show that you're not loyal.
It's a double ended sword.

I should know better than to do that!

But I didn't know what else to do.

I think we both need to grow up...

Agape93 · Accepted Answer

Immediately. That's like saying hey, I almost shot you in your sleep. But I didn't. You can trust me.

AviatorTom · Answer

Almost ls like close, and close only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades and nuclear war. No reason to breakup with someone who stopped themselves before they cheated.

loveslongnails · Answer

I've thought about this a bit before answering, and I've concluded that admitting to "almost cheating" is one of the dumbest things you can do to your partner, AND your relationship! What good can come out of it? I disagree with the lovely MsP that it "proves sincerity" - the fact that you didn't actually DO it is the proof.

Bringing it up as a confession looking for absolution doesn't make any sense to me. In fact, it's a selfish act because it's like saying "look - I was true to you and to us. I was tempted but I didn't give in, so that be prove how loyal I am". Huh? I don't think so?

The only thing it does is put doubts in the mind of your partner, but if you're being totally honest with yourself, you'd tell them if you were continually looking elsewhere and "almost straying", because it would be the right thing to do for you both. Loose lips sink ships, so if it's not a one up deal and not a chronic problem, I would zip the lips.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

"Bye Felicia."

In short, I would be happy she had the integrity to admit she almost cheated, but that won't stop me from dumping her ass. Trust is now gone and it is only a matter of time before they actually go through with it. Never take bake a cheater, much less one who openly admitted considering it.

Qdbrown · Answer

It's definitely a warning that they are not really into you anymore. Maybe it's something that can be fixed, or has a solution. But people rarely improve with age.

I would contemplate it for awhile. I wouldn't breakup with them being honest. I would probably think deeply about what is best for everyone.

Also given the times I have been cheated on,. looking back, I could sense something was not right. A wise person should listen to their gut feelings and act accordiingly.

Sour-rose · Answer

Not break up... but we would have a talk to how this came to be. For someone to admit they "almost cheated" on me is a heart puncher but my name is sour-rose; didn't become this way by just trusting anyone. I trusted someone... and they shot my heart. So just breaking up with said person won't do much but have us both hurt. So we gonna talk about it as long as I have patience and hope. But trust in said person... well it's taken a hit in the wall... a big one. If it took another, the wall would probably become a black hole. One that nothing can repair it. :c

Phoenix98 · Answer

I don't know, maybe? Maybe not probably most likely give her the ole heave ho but at the same time maybe not just depends on the circumstances.

But either way the trust would be gone after that and even if you work it out that'll damage what relationship you have left.

Msputiton · Answer

We would have a long discussion. But admitting without being caught proves sincerity. But tbh.

I lose interest in everyone i date pretty quickly, and they probably almost cheated because they were lonely and bored from my neglect.

Most likely I was on the verge of leaving anyways. So most likely i would be like this just another sign i need to move on.

Also without a doubt i would confess.

AimeeKyle · Answer

It really depends upon the details. What state the relationship is in, what led up to and what actually occurred during the “almost cheated” incident.
They would get a few brownie points for being honest…. Of course I what made them want to tell me and how does what they have done make them feel. A lot more questions would follow.

I don’t think I would be able to say yes or no to dumping them or keeping them until I had all my questions answered / time to reflect.

Rudon00 · Answer

If someone cheated on me. I will give them a chance to choice who they want to be with. because Freedom is every human being right and love does not force relationship.

To cheat physically or emotionally on someone. I will be overwhelm with guilt so I will confess to my partner. And I will have to accept the consequences of my actions because after all I know better.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

“Almost cheating” is cheating. Younger people call it “emotional” cheating or something, i think. I’ve never been anywhere near infidelity, ever. I understand trust and commitment.

melanieeeB · Answer

Damn that's a tricky one... but I think I wouldn't trust him after that anymore... almost is too near on fully

Sorrento-Sun · Answer

I'd end the relationship If he told me he almost cheated. I wouldn't be able to trust he wouldn't in the future if he was gonna cheat but didn't.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

Cheating and almost cheating has intention. They thought of it and wanted to do it. If the opportunity presented itself they would've took it. Of course I would break up with them. Almost doing something is basically eventually doing it

Loveisgirthy · Answer

Flirting is a sort of natural thing that seems a bit addictive socially for a lot of people sometimes. Like a default likeable personality for them in a way. Its forgiveable if they resist I'd say but the trust level dwendles a bit. To me it says there's something on my end I could do better otherwise why did she get so close to the situation with someone else. I'd ask about the other guy... or other girl... (cuz it happens...) and just take what I could learn from what attracted them to the other person. I'd try and better myself if needed and if it's not enough then I'm done. Ideally the only relatio ship I'd like to be in is one where all these wants and attractions are prediscussed together and as often as it comes to mind. Too often people look for people who are already doing the things we like I think. Its sometimes just a learning process. But can't all be teachers either. Either approach is fair and the risk you take when you're almost in a cheating situation.

Crmolon · Answer

I think if someone contemplates cheating on you. They aren't really that into you at all, it's not a good fit. You and then deserve something more.

pinkflamingo92 · Answer

I would never admit to “almost” cheating nor would I want someone to admit to me that they “almost” cheated. You obviously came to your senses so why make the other person hurt? Unless it’s a manipulation thing? I just don’t get how it would help anything… but destroy persons trust in you… now if you actually did then I don't know personally don’t tell me and get your crap together is my opinion…

SnowedIn · Answer

Like a lot of my answers, it depends. How long of a relationship. What kind of almost cheating. Etc. But let's say it was my wife of 23 years and she said she almost cheated -- that'd tell me that she thought about it but made a conscious decision not to. There's tremendous power in that rather than mindless nothingness. So, getting back to your question, maybe? Not necessarily.

Anonymous · Answer

Growing up on a farm, I learned that when the dog kills one of your chickens, they have to be put down. Once they get a taste for it, they can't stop.

DavidRaul · Answer

If they were so close to cheating there is definitely wrong with our relationship and it can happen again. Its time to breakup and move on

UniquelyBasic · Answer

I probably wouldn't breakup especially if there was trouble in the relationship, I can see how cheating can happen since if put in enough situations anyone can cheat, even the most loyal person. Then it would be more of a communication problem on both our parts. And it also depends what they almost did. If it was almost a kiss or even if they did just kiss that seems like a silly reason to breakup.

RavVid · Answer

Almost cheating is a tough one. You'd feel like chucking her out but then they didn't so you have to give her credit for that. If it was almost cheating with a guy at work that she will have to be in contact with, I'd probably think she will do it eventually and chuck her out.

I have never confessed but the girlfriend of the time was very suss. She gave me the best sex she had ever done.

TrueConfection · Answer

That happened. I stayed with him, but it's difficult to not resent him for that and it's been over 20 years. I wouldn't let it go a second time.

belle_kai · Answer

Yes because almost will eventually lead to "I did"

AdithyaR · Answer

Depends on what the almost means, the context. Most of the times it would make me uneasy and unable to trust them.

JustinTheGreat · Answer

Oof. I forgave my husband for the time he cheated on me when we first dated in high school. I forgave him for the time he admitted he almost cheated. And I forgave him when he admitted that he did cheat on me again years ago.
At this point if it happens again, I’m done. Whether he cheats, tries to cheat, or just flirts with someone else, I’m gone.

snackthatsmilesback · Answer

No not in my current relationship. We both have a history w cheating so if anything even remotely like cheating feels like a good idea, we have to tell each other so we can catch it early n handle it.

If it was to that point where he already done some shit tho, that's already past thought to action. That's lies n u been out on a date w another man. That's full cheating in my book. I don't know if I'd break it off, but I'd definitely have to separate for a bit n decide.

Mark987 · Answer

Already happened. I went home and she was partying with my friends. Good friend took her... I only found days later... but I beat him

TaureanBull81 · Answer

When you're in the position where you've almost cheated (emotionally), you know deep down that there's something wrong or missing in your relationship so that's when we pretty much check out @DizzyDesii. I did this in my last relationship but never said anything to my exGF as she was verbally and emotionally abusive right up to the day I left her. I don't regret confiding in another woman during that time of my life.

BJP21 · Answer

You can't split the hairs on cheating. Almost a cheat is a cheat. It would depend how the other person defines the cheat.

Anonymous · Answer

If we were in thd dating stage I would be worried for the future.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Yes, because the "almost cheated" one is clearly not committed.

msc545 · Answer

I would breakup with someone who told me they almost cheated.

TrillXHippy · Answer

I would automatically break up with that person. No ifs and or buts about it

Abdulwahh · Answer

Almost that's close I won't seal the deal with that person.

exitseven · Answer

Almost cheating is not cheating. Everyone gets tempted by something. If they have the integrity to resist temptation, that is a good thing.

Sun_Kim-Ai · Answer

No. But then again, I got cheated on and forgave it, so I don't know if my opinion counts.

Cassie88 · Answer

The fact that they "almost" cheated means they did not, in fact, actually cheat, so no, I wouldn't break up over that.

Wish4UrB00ty · Answer

Yeah I don’t think I could trust them after that. Like I might try to move forward but I don’t think it would work. Lol!

Dargil · Answer

I would not. I'd talk it out with her on why she was tempted and am I falling short somewhere?

Sparkie460 · Answer

I came close to cheating several times but I couldn't go through with it. Almost cheating doesn't count. I didn't say anything. I know my wife wouldn't cheat on me

Anpu23 · Answer

No, if she set a hard line, told me about it we're good

cheetocandle · Answer

I would have to ask myself why are they even telling me this. The reasons behind it could be worse.

es20490446e · Answer

Between almost and done is a big difference.

Kyyroz · Answer

It would be a case by case basis really... depends on the scenario.

Jerre · Answer

All the girls I know are friends with benefits SO THE CAN HAVE SexWITH ANYBODY THEY choose. Fortunately it’s usually me.

Kkoalalita · Answer

I would definitely feel suspicious

kellytheman · Answer

I never almost cheated or even cheated on a girl but I have done some friendly flirting.

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah, if it goes so far, I'm not gonna wait until I get cuckolded. While I appreciate the honesty I'd part on good terms.

LimitedBenefits101 · Answer

She's out of the house immediately.

Tim-loves-it · Answer

No, If she tells me what she did, Im a forgiving sort of guy..

Girlpoop · Answer

No everyone struggles with the same demons today o tomorrow

Pink2000 · Answer

No. I’d stay. I love honesty.

serious_miss419 · Answer

Yes absolutely

annabananna · Answer

No they resisted temptation so I wouldn’t

Guardian45 · Answer

No. Not for "almost".

20yearsolder · Answer

No, I wouldn't

Jennz6 · Answer

Nope

eagle1951 · Answer

probably not

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