He put me through a lot in our 6 year relationship. From gaslighting to cheating, would make comments he’d kill himself if we ever broke up. Towards the end I wanted to leave but I couldn’t bring myself to since he was heavily depressed and gave me calls where he’d tell me he was going to end it since he has no one else to talk to. Shortly after he broke it off through text after doing long distance for two years (he’s in the military, now living in another state and I have my own career.)
He said he couldn’t marry or give me the family I wanted because of his mental health and he just wasn’t ready. Fast forward, I find out he’s married because I came across his wife because she popped up on my Facebook. Turns out he blocked me and all our friends that know him a few months after our breakup and when he started seeing this girl. Even his friends are shocked. He seemed to forget my sisters boyfriend since he was able to see his Instagram before he blocked him suddenly as well. It also seems he around his wedding day he changed his status on fb from being in a relationship with me to null. While his wife is the one that shared the wedding photos and is the only one that has the married status. His family who still follows me didn’t even post pictures or a congratulations. It’s just odd, maybe he’s hiding his marriage or he’s hiding me from her if he’s lying about recently being in a long term relationship. Seems like she was visiting the US from another country and they got married about 4 months of knowing each other.
We never contacted each other after the breakup and I don’t love him, but I feel immensely dumb that I wasted 6 years possibly being a place holder till he found the next best thing. They might have started talking before we broke up for all I know.
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You know how your ex is with the gaslighting, cheating, mental health issues etc. Now this woman is married to him and all of that. Be happy it’s not you. He’s gonna treat her judt like how he treated you. Their marriage is gonna end in divorce and if they go on to have a child it’s gonna be a terribly messy story of custody battles. He is married but won’t let anyone know about it. Posting nothing about getting married or his wife. In fact, spends more time than anything trying to hide her from people. Imagine that. Your husband trying to hide you from people and not wanting anyone to know about you. Imagine waking up recently married and knowing your husband is ashamed of you or the marriage, being on his phone searching up all the people he knew blocking them so they can’t find out about you. Nah. Again, just be happy it’s not you and don’t spend another second thinking about it. Breath the fresh air of freedom and ”dodged a bullet”.
Thank you for taking the time and putting things into this perspective! I’m immensely glad I’m out of the relationship and I really need to work on my self worth and not be hard on my self for dealing with this guy for so long. Posting wise, I know he posted her a few times on Instagram while they were dating (because my sisters boyfriend saw) but once he noticed that my sisters boyfriend saw a story post, he blocked him immediately as well. So while it seems he’s only sharing about her on Instagram, it seems everyone in our hometown associated with me is blocked on that platform. Snapchat and Facebook, he posts nothing. And he blocked me on fb on the wedding day from what it seems. Even mothers of my friends are blocked haha
What is your question?
I guess why go out of his way to keep the marriage so private from everyone.
My guess would be that he is trying to create a completely new life for them.