What were your experiences with an ex starting to talk to you again?

[Anonymous]

Ex has started talking to me again after months since the break up. Nothing about anything besides small talk. It’s been a week of it. Not sure what to make of it but she essentially said she added me because she miss talking and just wants to talk. Feels like conversation goes dead then picks up after a day or two of not much talk.

[Anonymous]

It was odd. Like she clearly still did (and still does) dislike and distrust me, but still really wanted to tell me about every minute detail and update about her life? Did not want to hear shit from me though. Conversation dies off real fast if I try to talk about my life, but girl can drone on for hours about her own shit...

Dunno what's going through her head. We don't talk much, I don't think either of us actually enjoy it. But when we do, it's just a lot of her ignoring me and talking about herself.

[Asker]

Yeah I’m kinda experiencing the same thing but she only really asks me questions and if I try to reciprocate it she either ignores my questions or give brief responses or changes the subject

[DishLady]

Bc it hurts to try to hit a genuine stride as friends once you’ve been lovers… but like any form of exercise once you get past the “burn” phase the reward is great. If the friendship is worth establishing, try not to give up, however also don’t beat yourself up over THEIR lack of response. As my mom used to say, “It takes two to tango.”

[DishLady]

You're trying to be friends.

[BTigers96]

It sounds like last serious ex I had prior to getting married. We broke up, 1 year later she's calling, sending me cards, etc... saying the same.

I ended up essentially saying "we had our chance" and "we should both just move on". 1 year later she was engaged, and after 7 years and many, many, women later so was I. We both dodged a bullet... because had we gotten back together we would have been divorced within 5 years. :)

[Asker]

Who broke up with who? Yeah my ex hasn’t really been too extensive. She broke up with me 8 months ago and seems like she just wants small talk. When the conversation dies off she will either send me a blank pic of her or leave me on seen and then send me a blank pic of her a day later (this is Snapchat though). Seems like she wants to talk but not putting in any effort to have a genuine conversation.

[BTigers96]

She broke up with me. But, she probably just beat me to it by a few months. Yeah, sounds like the classic "I miss you" but I'm not really sure what I want either cry for help. My advice is to let her figure it out on her own. Move on, there are plenty of fish in the sea. If she does figure it out and decides you're the one for her... you'll be better off. I ended it by asking her if her current boyfriend knew we we talking, and that I'd be pissed if I were him, etc... basically "I'm busy, and I have all the friends I need, bye". She's fishing... don't fall for it.

[Asker]

Ahh okay fair enough, we had a messy break up as I didn’t want it to end and kept holding on. We did hook up a couple times after the break up. I’ve now moved city’s for a better job so I don't know why it’s taken her this long to do this. Basically she said she misses talking to me and that she might be in my new city for a course and said she would like to stay at my place?… I don't know it’s just confusing because it doesn’t feel like it’s genuine. It is a 180 from her end because I was the one reaching out until I stopped and moved city’s/moving on.

[BTigers96]

Sounds like a classic case of "I don't know what the heck I want". Women always want what they can't have. If you can handle banging her without entanglements do it... otherwise just keep moving. Good luck

[Asker]

Thank you man, yeah I don’t think I can, I was pretty serious with her and I wound’ve done anything for her. We are in different states now and she knows that. How do you think I should cut off the contact? Either just ignore the snaps from her or should I say something?

[BTigers96]

Be honest. Tell her that you think it would be best for both of you to move on... in your own words. I used the phrase "everything happens for a reason" ... if you're meant to be together you'll find your way back to each other in the future. I. E... if she decides she can't live without you and you're "the one" you'll perhaps listen if/when she figures herself out.

[Asker]

Alright no worries, thank you!!

[In_Trance]

That doesn't happen

[Asker]

How so?