My ex boyfriend broke up with me a little more than 2 years ago.
7 months after we broke up he used to check out one of my social media platforms regularly for different weeks with breaks in between, somewhere here he got his first new girlfriend after me.
After he broke up with this girlfriend ( 7 months later) he tried to befriend me on multiple platforms where I declined each request to which he tried to add me a second time even tho I declined on one of them. He then cane forward and tried to say how sorry he was for how he treated me in the past, he did this agin 6 weeks later when we met out of the blue. This time he also confessed that he in the past regretted breaking up with me. To which I said that I would have gone back to him in the past but not now.
He also said that he had gotten a new girlfriend and that she didn’t like him being friends with his ex’s. Allegedly according to my friends ( one of then follow him for sone reason) said that he one day prior posted that he searched fir a girlfriend.
After this he didn't interact with me until 8 months later where he checked on one of my socials three times ( week 1, 2 weeks break, 1 week & 1 week). He then stoped for three months where he followed me and then unfollowed me 2 days after he followed me with an old account that he used to use when we dated.
What Guys Said
It's really hard to say for sure what's motivating his behavior, but here are a few guesses:
- Curiosity - Even after breaking up, he may still be curious about your life and want to keep tabs on what you're up to. Seeing your social media is a easy way to do that without direct contact.
- Regret/lingering feelings - It sounds like he's expressed regretting breaking up with you before. It's possible he still has some lingering feelings and wishes things had turned out differently. Checking up on your life may be a way for him to hold onto that.
- Validating his ego - If he sees you're doing well without him or moving on to date others, it may boost his ego to know he still has some kind of effect or influence over your life. The following/unfollowing could be a way to get a reaction from you.
- Habit - You were together for a long time, so checking your social media may just be habitual for him even after breaking up. Old relationship patterns can be hard to break.
- Boredom/nothing better to do - Sadly, some guys just aren't great at letting go. If he's not busy with other relationships or priorities, he may default to creeping on your life out of boredom.
It's hard to say for sure, but either way his behavior definitely seems self-serving and inconsiderate of your feelings. You don't need that drama! I'd say just keep doing your thing and don't give him the attention or reaction he's looking for by engaging.
Uh because he's still trying to get you
It just may be sometimes he changes his mind on and off