Me and my ex broke up a while back. He isn't into committed relationships. However we still love each other and he is my best friend. Plus, we still have physical attraction. He also didn't want to completely let go of me either, so we decided to compromise and try some new age thing where we're single but still have a relationship going out of convenience.
Now, this seemed great for a while, but I feel unsatisfied. I feel that as long as I stick around with this, I'll just keep wanting to be with him more, even though it's probably a lost because (I know it's dumb to hope that people will change). I keep hoping he only feels this way because we're young (high school upperclassmen) and that he'll change his mind about what he wants in a few years. We're just so close though. A part of me would like to move on to something more fulfilling that can lead to what I want, which is a long steady committed relationship and possible marriage one day. But another bigger part of me is repulsed by the idea, because even though I know he'd be okay, I still feel like I'd be betraying him. I can't see myself maintaining our STRONG friendship, if I go to another guy, and I can't even think of forgetting him, it's too hard and too mean. I just want us both to be happy, and I'm struggling to find a way.
If I do get into another relationship though, how can I move on? Every guy I think of feels like second best. I feel like I'd be one of those girlfriends who always talks about my ex and it wouldn't be harmless. How do I keep at it long enough to get someone else to replace this void and to keep me from thinking about my friend that way and to take over first choice position?
Now, this seemed great for a while, but I feel unsatisfied. I feel that as long as I stick around with this, I'll just keep wanting to be with him more, even though it's probably a lost because (I know it's dumb to hope that people will change). I keep hoping he only feels this way because we're young (high school upperclassmen) and that he'll change his mind about what he wants in a few years. We're just so close though. A part of me would like to move on to something more fulfilling that can lead to what I want, which is a long steady committed relationship and possible marriage one day. But another bigger part of me is repulsed by the idea, because even though I know he'd be okay, I still feel like I'd be betraying him. I can't see myself maintaining our STRONG friendship, if I go to another guy, and I can't even think of forgetting him, it's too hard and too mean. I just want us both to be happy, and I'm struggling to find a way.
If I do get into another relationship though, how can I move on? Every guy I think of feels like second best. I feel like I'd be one of those girlfriends who always talks about my ex and it wouldn't be harmless. How do I keep at it long enough to get someone else to replace this void and to keep me from thinking about my friend that way and to take over first choice position?
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+1 y
I'd like to emphasize the friendship. We are inseparable. We've been each others almost exclusive support system. I don't doubt that he cares about me just as much if not more as I do for him.
We're currently trying to see different people. He doesn't personally understand my desires. He hates relationship with everyone and he's obsessed with his freedom. He's a proud bachelor, but he's a kid, so I expect him not to want to settle. It could be real, but he could be going through a phase
We're currently trying to see different people. He doesn't personally understand my desires. He hates relationship with everyone and he's obsessed with his freedom. He's a proud bachelor, but he's a kid, so I expect him not to want to settle. It could be real, but he could be going through a phase
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