Why I Think 'Kids' Under 16 Dating Should Not be Encouraged

Call me prude.

With the increase in dating culture, I've seen 13 y/o kids getting into relationships and falling in love. When I was 13, 'love' was what my parents and siblings did to me. While many may argue that the kind of relationships pre-teens have is not an actual one, I still argue that such relationships should also not be encouraged. Why?
Why I Think 'Kids' Under 16 Dating Should Not be Encouraged

1. They distract a lot of time.

This is a stage where most of their focus should be inclines towards getting good grades and learning new skills, so as to build a strong foundation for the future. If they indulge in finding a partner, the newly found excitement will take up most of their time.

2. 'Heartbreaks.'

I've seen 12 year olds posting statuses that 'I'm done with dating.' Seriously, what? They don't even know what being in a relationship means and they take up so much on their heart due to 'heartbreaks'. While this may seem cute for us, what effect does it have on their mind?

3. Peer pressure and complexes.

These kinda things happen in highschool. But they're gradually shifting to middle schools where kids are no more kids. This innocent age is being affected. Already having rich gadgets and looking like a model, if this being in a 'relationship' becomes a fad, what will happen?

4. They're simply too young.

You never know when they take a next step they aren't supposed to. With the reach of internet, they might end themselves in trouble.

Why I Think 'Kids' Under 16 Dating Should Not be Encouraged

This is what I've on the top of my mind currently. Give your views, what do you think?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • We are human, nothing more. None of us are perfect.
    Kids are entering puberty earlier than they did fifty or even a hundred years ago. Today it is not uncommon to find a 13 year old claiming to be in love. They may not know all about love, but they learn along the way. Most start dating at 14 to 16 and that is ok. Again they learn what they want in a partner as they grow older.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I strongly disagree you can try to tell a girl/boy not to date until a right age. If they find someone they want to be with they will ignore your rules and date him/her anyway. Of course everyone is gonna have some break their heart. It is how we all learn. Learn how to grow in a fast moving world.

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What Guys Said 45

  • Allow me to start this off by stating I could bet money you are just reflecting what your parents or pastor or authority figure near you have said. there is no way in hell a 17-year-old can hold the same stance as a 45-year-old soccer mom Baptist Christian. without simply repeating what they hear.

    now to start my rebuttal.

    1. teens and kids are walking ADHD if it's not relationships or social standing distracting them its shiny key's fidget spinners and Pokemon cards. I would rather have them pre test driving relationships and complex social actions that will help them later than the former.

    2. as you are a girl and was once 13 you probably lost your shit and cried a bunch over some shit boy band so I can tell you mellow drama happens anyway they will get over it.

    3. oh im sorry I did not notice your title of GOD arbiter of morality. cut the innocence bullshit I knew more shit than you at 8 about the world than you do now. and multiply that by 1000 for my current age. I am an internet God and oh look never dated once still a virgin. *lewd as hell though* it's almost like your stance is biased somehow. that knowledge will "corrupt children's innocence and make them do naughty things they should not"
    allow me to educate you. morality is subjective and unless you got a bigger stick than everyone else than you have zero right to force your subjective morality as if it's objective.

    4, the only things that hold an objective age restriction are fire arms. voting. Alchohol, drugs, sex between adults, and driving. everything else is open to all.

    I would be curious on your political stance and that of your family's and if you hold any allegiance to a certain religion as I feel this is not truly your opinion but simply a reflection of what is programed in you. though the amount of Hypocrisy and lack of self-awareness is that of a teenager. so I could be wrong and this truly your stance. in which case I would suggest buying a mirror you are 17 while that is one year above where you think dating should start. a bit funny it's not 18 not 17 but 16. which just so happens to be right below you. of course, you see your self-capable but not those one year below or two.

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    • I get you. Although I'd clarify this is completely my own opinion and stance. You're free to disagree with it. Coming to why I feel it's 16, is because most people graduate highschool by that time and go to college at 17/18. Also no, it has nothing to do with the fact that I'm 17.

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    • metalsucks is just saying that because he's jealous of all the guys and girls who got into relationships as teens and he wasn't able to.

      Seriously every other week he posts a question asking why white girls don't like him and shit like that.

    • He posts the question anonymously, but the speech patterns are way too similar and it's obviously him posting those questions.

  • Nice. My 14 year old daughter told me that she isn't going to date until she is in college. Her reason? She said she wasn't attracted to boys her age. Skinny, pimples, and goofy. (Her words) She said that she likes guys around 18-20 but for them to go out with her at her age was just creepy. Smart girl.

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  • I disagree. I actually performed best in school when I had a girlfriend. Don't know if it was coincidence, but it happened.
    I don't see anything wrong with dating before 16. I started at 11, and I turned out fine (for the most part ;P )

    P. S.: I love the irony in Michelle Obama's quote. She's basically saying girls should drop boys so they can become something, but all Michelle is in life is just a wife. She earned nothing.

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    • Look it up: she's from a poor family and earned two big uni degrees.

  • It's part of growing up. Everyone has different needs at different stages of life. We can do our best to guide and educate them, but they should have the freedom to date and learn from their mistakes. There are some rare cases we're childhood or teen dating/romance leads to a more long term one at adulthood.

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  • I don't think it's ever good to force people to suppress their feelings. If two teens are attracted o each other and want to date, let them have a go, maybe it'll work out and maybe it won't. At the very least, its experience in a relationship, and it could turn out to be something special.

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  • I disagree. While kids that age shouldn't be having sex, I don't think them learning to negotiate some of the feelings and complexities of relationships is a bad thing. Especially given relationships at later ages tend to be much more serious fast, getting some experience in lighter relationships isn't a bad idea imho.

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  • It is a bit young. What I don't get is why people think is ok for under 18's or underage kids to have sex but only with those of the same age. My country has the right idea once you turn 16 sex is legal and so is marraige with any age but under 16 it's all illegal.

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  • >Is seventeen
    >says people under 16 are the problem

    You basically picked your age and then discouraged it for every age under you.

    I'm almost 19 and I've never had a girlfriend before. DEVELOP SOCIAL SKILLS, KIDS. DON'T END UP AN INCEL LIKE DanoMR98!!!

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  • Damn you're saying that cause you're 17😂😂
    Though I completely agree with all the points except age factor. They can date if they know how to manage those things
    by the way Till yesterday, the boys who asked us "Do you have games in ur phone?" are posting status like "true love hurts"😂😂
    Bam!!

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  • I started having sex at 15 and it helped me grow up. I saw earlyon that life is about building relationships, that men are supposed to partner with women and women expect men to make money and be strong. There are 25 yo guys today who are fat virgins who play video games all day and have no job. I was working two jobs and had my own place at 18, and I was motivated to do that because of women.

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  • Agreed, when someone is under 18, they should not be participating in anything like that (simple and friendly boyfriend/girlfriend stuff is fine, but nothing more serious), someone is 18, they can go crazy if they want. My views might be slightly skewed since I am Catholic and don't believe in sex until marriage. Under 18 is way to young for any serious romantic behavior in my opinion, they are still classified as a kid.

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  • i agree its disgusting how every 12 years old these days is dating someone, by the time they hit 18 most kids are not kids anymore and the dont even understand howt he world works.

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  • I could not agree more, on the same token, they will do it regardless of my opinion. So even though i will not encourage it, i will not stop it because at that age if i say no it will just happen behind my back.

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  • Well, my parents dont encourage it. So im going to always be kinda ackward and weird. But i dont give a fuk. imma get me a nice girl and we are gonna do cool stuff. I should experiance this while in a highschool so i can be kinda normal as an adult.

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  • I understand your points, but humans are naturally going to seek dating out whenever they feel they're ready for it. Quote by the former First Lady aside (because she makes a good point), people want to date. And that's okay, as long as they're safe about it. How else do we learn?

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  • There are cases where people do find love at a young age but I have to agree with you, in most cases it never goes anywhere and just wastes your time.

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  • I don't see why we shouldn't date.. I have started dating since 13 and I did not regret it even once. I believe that the earlier you find someone to love the easier will become to find someone else later because after maturing, you find yourself that you find it hard to start a relationship. That's my opinion.

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  • My first love was when I was 13 and it was a pure kids love but we didn't make anything not even kissing just love by itself, the second love it was at 16 and same as the first one and then at 17 I loved another girl and I kissed her nothing else, and the fourth love was the best one of them all, but I found out that the girl I love is not virgin and she was dating one of my class students so I broke up with her, now I'm done I won't waste my time anymore.

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  • as a general synopsis anyone under 16 shouldn't be able to talk to the other gender, but some of us / them are more mature and should be able to date I guess but I don't know I can't look back in hindsight to see it better because im still under 16

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  • I agree, they shouldn't date that young, or if they do, have some parental supervision to make sure bad things don't happen.

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  • I concur. Kids needs to grow up a bit and get through all the identity crisis mess first.

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  • I'd say that the more you try to discourage it, the more it's going to happen.

    As far as things like distractions, heart break and peer pressure, they're going to happen anyway. As we reach adolescence, hormones start to get out of control and we have sexual thoughts and urges.

    And I understand that they may seem too young as well, but these are the years that lay the foundation of their sexualities, what they want in a partner and who they are as a human being. They're experiences that they learn from and build on as they go through life.

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  • people shouldn't be discouraged from showing that they like eachother. They are humans and are meant to show emotion. It might not work out a lot of the time, but in those instances that they do something good comes out of it. If it doesn't work then it simply doesn't, time heals them and they learn from their mistakes and become a better person. Why are you trying to shelter kids and tell them ''you shouldn't date at this age'' if two kids like eachother, they should not be forced not to date. If I have kids, Ill give them that luxury

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  • It's better they learn at a young age instead of becoming sexual deviants as adults.

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    • Yeah, they should become sexual deviants as early as possible.

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    • Hmm, never heard of Hartford University but what's a few letters off...

      I'm afraid both my University of California certs are in a box somewhere.

    • But I have to admit that was a pretty good accomplishment for a 15 year old.

  • You can't stop that but you could make them think in an assertive way, let them analyze the weight of their decision, instead of trying to keep them in a bubble.

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  • I could do without the Michele picture but other then that I agree to a degree anyway.

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  • I'm asking for your help. You had just proved you can see my actions before I make them. This is the spiritual war im talking about

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  • age of understanding is not there. but yes to understand the physical and physcological aspect you have to be mature enough. so its k if you go in realtion after 13yrs of age.

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  • You can be prude if you want but that doesn't mean you get to decide what everyone else has to do

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  • Total nonsense. Once the teen age number is reached, the more dating experience the better.

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What Girls Said 28

  • I feel like there's a certain level of maturity you have to possess when it comes to dating... Some people may have that at a young age, some may still not have it at a much greater age. I do think it's better to be older though... Learn all about yourself before you try to learn about someone else.

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  • My parents said I could start dating whenever I wanted. They just wouldn't drive me on my dates/to his house, pay for my dates, or allow him over.

    But hey, I could date him if I wanted to :p

    This essentially made me only able to date once I was employed and had a vehicle. So...16.

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  • I think that your points are really good. I think that this growing culture of sexualization at young ages is disgusting. The fact that so many people adamantly disagree with that is concerning.

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  • It's better to get 'heartbroken' when grades don't count as much. Also most girls' menstruation comes much earlier than a few years ago, so it's probably natural.

    Also children see much more of the world nowadays, and get more use of it. They know more at the age of 13 than we knew at that age.

    I think we should teach kids how to be clever in a relationship, because if we forbid it they'll still do it, only in secret, which isn't any better.

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    • Puberty comes early because kids eat more, ration food so they don't hit puberty till 16, or, you could inject them with hormones, either way, you shouldn't go through puberty when you're still a child.

    • @Bezbozhnikustanka Or you could use food that is organic and hasn't had chemicals added through fertilisers, herbicides, pesticides or anti-biotics or extra nutrients and growth hormones.

  • Well, I'm 15 in little more than one month and I've been with my boyfriend for almost 6 months now. Even if we break up tomorrow I won't think all the time we spent together was wasted. We really like each other and expect to stay together for a long time.

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  • I agree, a lot of teens are too obsessed with dating and sex now instead focusing on school. We have teen girls growing up to be teenage moms when they should be enjoying their youth, having fun, and learning as well as planning for their future. A lot people I saw date in high school aren't even together anymore and often didn't last more than a week. Then what you know, their with someone else.. it's just teenage drama.

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  • Personally I regret dating in high school because he was an asshole I should had stay single and I agree with you.

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  • Stupid MyTake

    1. They distract a lot of time? So what? It's not like I'm only going to be thinking of school 24/7. I have to have fun too. Life isn't all about getting good grades.

    2. "Heartbreaks". I had to lol at this one. Everything you do in life is going to have ups and downs. So you just go ahead and completely avoid doing anything that might cause problems? So you might as well not to do anything by that logic.

    3. Peer pressure? WTF? Middle school kids have been dating for a long time.

    4. So dating will cause them to commit crime? Ummm WTF did you get that from? Hanging out with the wrong crowd might also cause you to commit crimes, so going on that, you shouldn't have friends at all.

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  • The best time for that is college...
    Better people, smarter crowd + you're smarter... It's just the thing to do.

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  • I got in a relationship with my girlfriend when i was 14!! We are still together now and both about to turn 18!! Shegot me through so much I would be dead if she wasn't around through a lot. she's a true blessing I think love is love and we have been dating for almost 5 years now started at 14..

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  • There's nothing wrong when dating while being this young. Generally they only stay together for like 3 month and only do some kiss.

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  • I agree that it's not helpful for them to date at that age, but you can't prevent it so...

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  • I agree. It shouldn't be encouraged, but it shouldn't be a taboo either.

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  • I agree. I'm Mormon and this is something my church teaches, no dating before 16.

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  • Excuse me if they find someone they adore you can't stop them!!!

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  • Relationships up until a certain age are pointless. Most don't even last longer than a year. When I see younger people getting into relationships, especially if they're under the age of 16, I give them a few months before it's over. My cousin who's turning 15 in September has had a countless amount of girlfriends, and this was all within a few months. They just don't work out. Relationships aren't something you get into because you can. They take work and parts of you.

    Though I disagree with the heartbreak point of view, because those occur no matter what age you are, it is rather ridiculous for a 12 year old to say they're through with dating. It was never anything serious in the first place.

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  • Here's my situation:
    I'm under 16. I'm dual-enrolled at both college and high school. On a daily basis, I'm told to think and act as an adult, because soon we'll be going off to campus. I'm dating a guy who's sweet as sugar. He's got a job. We constantly message each other about schoolwork and helping each other out. I took chemistry and algebra 2 last year, which he will be taking this year. I take pre-calc and physics this year. We both agreed we won't say we love each other until we know for sure, we've never even kissed, and we're both close with each others families. In the world I've come to know, kids are pressured to act older so often that their minds start to trick them into thinking they are older as well. If you tell me to perform at a college level, I'm going to start to think like a 20 year old as well.

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  • If you think like this there is never a right time to do it

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  • Preach!!!
    +1 in agreement 😎

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  • I agree with you.

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  • agree

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  • Kids don't need to date it's not even serious.

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  • I don't see the issue with it.

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  • Kids need to enjoy their innocence. I agree.

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  • this is such a bullshit take that i cld alr expected that it was by an indian before i even read her username. children under 13 shouldn't date? well chileren under 17 shouldn't try to decide who can and who can't date. its their life. settle your own.

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  • dating shouldn't have an age limit. it's just that younger kids tend to only go by "oh she's cute" and "he's handsome" rather than thinking of the emotional and mental parts of the relationship because to them, that doesn't matter because they're just kids

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  • That is true, these days 12 year old have a boyfriend lol

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  • Their definition of dating is not the traditional grown up version

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