I turned 18 yesterday.

[Anonymous]

I turned 18 yesterday.
I thought I’d be able to keep hope and optimism but ‪It really does set in. I’m 18. I’m 18 and still not thin, still have low self esteem, still have no friends, still haven’t got my hair done the way I would like, still can’t do makeup, still don’t feel beautiful in my body. ‬

[Desire-for-Greatness]

18 years old? This is not when you have to be perfect. This is when your journey to perfection begins!

Get a piece of paper, write down your goals in life. Make them almost unattainable and then start try to achieve them through every day small goals.

If you wanna look like a model then eat like a model, work out like a model.

If you wanna be smart like a scientist then study as much as a scientist, think outside the box.

Look up ways which can help you achieve your massively ambitious goals. You can do anything.

Have confidence in yourself, you are special and you're better than the others.

Believe that. Even if it isn't true now it'll be true later God willing.

You are better than ordinary people! Believe that! And have confidence more than anyone you know!

Then make that confidence fit you by improving everything about yourself and learning new things.

Do it!

[ClearSea]

Damn, thanks!

[Desire-for-Greatness]

You're welcome

[Skye1717]

Don't be afraid to try some new things, within reason. If you can find a good healthy eating and exercise plan, that might be beneficial if you're worried about your body, but don't push yourself too hard. And remember that, sure we all want to be beautiful, but you don't have to be beautiful to matter. You're also in the age bracket where depression peaks, so just keep an eye out for feeling really bad an unmotivated, in case you'd need to see a doctor or counselor, because honestly, if you have the medical imbalance which causes depression, there's pretty much no amount of motivational stuff you can do to fix yourself without being treated properly. Just don't get discouraged. There's still time. :) Life is a learning process, and most likely at no time will you ever feel like you've "arrived" at being all you've ever wanted to be.

[myTake Owner]

This is a really helpful reply. I try to lift my spirits with daily affirmations and journaling but honestly it feels like a facade. I’m going to try some work out plans. But my biggest problem is overcoming the problem of my inner voice telling myself I’ll never be where I want to be physically. Or that no diet will work. Or the exercise won’t pay off.

But yeah, day by day.

[Skye1717]

Best wishes and prayers! :)

[PeterAyre]

Eighteen is a teenager! Still have 2 years of that. Turning eighteen is a great potential place to start a new chapter. Accept where you are, forgive yourself, start really small and reward yourself for really small progress. To be honest I would start by considering going to the doctors. Mental health is real and can kill. Also imagine if you are deficient in something, I knew of a man who killed himself the day before he received a letter that he was deficient. Consider doing something measurable, with your fitness like couch to 5k in the UK or learn to do press-ups (speed metabolism up will not make you look hench, sorry) Something that shows progress (rewarding, don't forget to celebrate) independent and regardless of your self image and also builds discipline. Stay hydrated, drink as much water as you think you should, it's great for your skin. Weight loss groups like weightwatchers can help. Even just lifesum (app) before you eat (Please slowly adjust down deficits to required weight loss). Once a week weigh ins, if you are up for it that week. Try and be healthy, if you can cut out chocolate great, then if you can sugary foods awesome. Start small don't try and do everything at once and expect to be good at it all straight away.

[PeterAyre]

Good and not old running shoes are always a must for running to prevent injury. Couch to 5k is a very good program (it's a app) I would recommend it too ANYONE wanting to get fit. Makes a runner out of those that don't run.

[myTake Owner]

Thank you! I’m download the app now

[UmmWhatsGoingOn]

It's actually a good thing that you can make this list. It means that you know what to work on, of course nothing is going to change just because it's your birthday, it's just another day. You have to put the time into what you want. It won't come get fast but it will come sooner if you work on them.

I'm sorry you don't feel beautiful in your body. But some of the things above are about your body so why don't you go and get your hair done the way you want it, if you want be more thin then you will need to work out at least a little per day maybe, just make it part of your routine in some way. Remember it will not come quickly you need to be diligent with it.

Also friends are sometimes hard to make but you just have to be confident in your self, and it does not sound like you currently are so what you can do is just fake that you are confident in who you are. Also its not terrible to not have friends, I did not have friends for awhile you just get time to figure out who you are.

If you can't to make up you can look up tutorials there's thousands on YouTube and I know you have the internet because you can get on this app. But if you can't maybe ask other people who wear make up if they could teach you how (not do it for you because you want to learn). And maybe this might turn into a friendship.

Best of wishes to you are friend and family
Please comment back if you have any questions or anything else

[Lynx122]

I just turned 30 and I'm still figuring myself out and trying to figure out life and this world too. In todays world 18 means nothing. When I was 18 I didn't know shit and couldn't do shit it's just the starting point of your adult life you don't have to expect to know how to be an adult yet. I felt really empty when I turned 18 because I didn't even know where to start being an adult but slowly over time you pick things up and gain some experience.

Sometimes events like this are a good thing because now you know what you're not happy with so you can set goals for yourself and slowly start to work on those things. It will take some time but after a while you'll look back and think wow I actually made progress I'm further now than I was before. You can also write a journal about your struggles and especially your successes so you can see clearly how far you've come :)

[myTake Owner]

Great advice 💛

[thomual]

How much does this matter to you? Enough to make a life changing and extremely painful change? The gym and dietician is the only to ensure your physical appearance will improve. You have to hate the way you look and feel so much you are willing to suffer for an hour non stop every day.

That's what the gym feels like. But if you don't care about your self esteem enough to suffer, then maybe its not as low as you thought. You should do it either way though. Endorphins will improve your mood, you will be healthier, and people will treat you better.

There is a such thing as body dismorphia and that is when you are never happy with how you look. Clothing helps where makeup fails. Try improving your wardrobe

[myTake Owner]

This is a really helpful reply. I was slowly trying to ease myself back into gym but then this entire lockdown thing happened. And I’ve always sucked at home workouts and morning jogs, hence why the gym was my go to. Now I don’t even have that so even the rare times I’m motivated to make an effort, I feel like I have nothing to do.
Dieting is so much harder than said. I’ve tried so many but they’re all either too expensive for me to maintain as a kid with no job, or they’re inconvenient.
I wish I had a nutritionist..

[myTake Owner]

These celebrities/rich people have it easy, they can just hire a dietician, have weekly meal preps delivered to their door, and a personal trainer. Smh

[Michael88]

The trick is to stop caring. When you hit rock bottom - and it sounds like you haven't reached that yet because you're still "trying" - you are faced with a stark choice: rise or fall.

Personally, I realised at that moment that seeking the acceptance and approval of others was stopping me from living my life. So I stopped caring what people thought and starting doing things for me. It was amazing how quickly life turned around after that.

Don't assume, don't expect, don't hope but don't worry.

[didiG]

I applaud you for that. People will always find something to say do you might as well do whatever you want with your life bc its YOUR life

[Alwayreckles93]

Are ok you can talk to me om here to help those that need a friend. I was in ypur position once. When I was in high school I tough I had friends but turns out everyone is fake in high school. I wanted to dressed so cute but my mom was a religious narcissistic control freak. I wanted to date this guy ever since 7 grade but it never happen cheer up You are still blooming you are beautiful believe. If you didn't have friends in high school they were never worth it. I will share my secret what I did i put myself in my mind I can do this I can get a new look. I took action later the guy that never notice me in high school wanted me but it was too late I had move on I got a job and made new friends. Head up high girl you can do this I know you can. You are much better believe me.

[ZackBan]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
You make it sound like there is someone out there that actually has his life together and is happy in own skin. Like seriously.
I can assure you, you are one in 8 billion when it comes to not feeling beautiful. It's not something weird it's just the way humans are wired to think. But what you can do is be happy with who are even if you wish to be better, just tell yourself this is part of the journey tomorrow I'll look and feel different so let me live today as it is.

[Imcmullan]

Hey! Snap out of it! Know that life is LITERALLY WHAT WE MAKE IT. if you want to be thin that badly, simply start eating Vegetables and protein.. NOTHING PROCESSED. limit your sugar intake.. only allow yourself desert 2 times a week... n in. 3 weeks, one cheat meal a week. Go outside.. speed walk.. then work yourself up to jogging.. or stay in and find a work out on YouTube.. speaking of YouTube, you can look up makeup tutorials. The only way to get good at it is by practicing... you are only 18yo dear.. you have a long way to go to get to your goals.. but remember, goals don't happen on their own... you have to put in the work.. make a list of your goals.. make a plan.. a real detailed plan.. and everyday get up and work on your plan! You got this.. you can't feel bad for yourself if you know you haven't put in 100% of effort. You got this!!

[I-am-a-nobody]

Come on, snap out of it.
Nobody has it all together. If they say they do, they're just faking it.
You can lose those pounds and most of my friends at age 18 were self centered stab in the back weasels anyway. So, you might be better without them.
Set good goals and press ahead.

God bless you.

[myTake Owner]

I appreciate what you’ve said. It’s all easier said than done. Especially when you’ve endured it this long. I’ll definitely utilise your advice about setting goals.

[I-am-a-nobody]

I know it is easier said then done. 18 stinks, but it should get better.
My life got better through my twenties and believe it or not my life is better now than ever.

[emptygracey]

You're only 18. That's less than a quarter of your expected lifespan. Self love comes with self improvement, you'll never get anywhere feeling sorry for yourself without putting the effort in. And believe me, everyone has qualities that they don't like about themselves. I even have trouble with the self improvement that I preached about earlier. Still, you're young as hell and have a lot more time than many others to work on yourself, so block out the parts of your mind that make you feel bad and work hard to beat them so they don't come back.

[mattmanyah2]

Try something new if you honestly care about your weight fight it. If you honestly care about what other people think than change your character to who you want to be... My hair's curly it's always terrible my make up skills suck =) you go be you find a way to correct your problems with you and do it.

[Analogist]

Don't worry, as you get older you give less and less of a shit. I know it's important to you right now but it's probably far important to those that know you. It gets easier, I kkow this is of little help though. Just try to keep your chin up and try to find a positive in every situation.

[Nik1hil]

*hugs*

you will get there, I am 23 and still far behind, do not worry just keep working on yourself

[myTake Owner]

Appreciate that.

[FictionalCharacter]

I’m 30 and I still have low self esteem, still have no friends, still haven’t got my hair done the way I would like, still can’t do makeup, still don’t feel beautiful in my body. ‬

[AllThatSweetJazz]

Used to be in a similar position I suppose. Did some research, put in some effort, lost 60kg. Though a breakup ruined my progress, I'm trying to get back on that wagon. Never felt beautiful in my body, but I think that's just life as a dude.

[Kotallyaw3some]

Hey I just turned 18 in March i feel you completely, I have no job, never really had a girlfriend but now (as soon as c-19 blows over) you can go out and do what you want, you don't have to be under your parents thumb

[SenseiSeptred]

Here is an example of something that you could probably use? If a person wants you to eat them up no matter their gender as an example, or as long as they are single, then you may seriously want to think about being their most adaptable backdrop in their lives and provide the greatest confidence boost of their life even if you end up jumping into territory that could get you judged on a regular basis especially by some of what is called close-minded religious people.

[blacktiger021]

start write a few things and make plan to reach them even with snails speed couse it can be worset when u reach 25 and still have this feelings :/

[TheGrandOracle]

I'm 20 and still feel like that. Even when I look at things logically. I've achoeve a lot but it never feels like anything I should feel good about and never will

[sensible27]

Slow but steady you will get there. Slow and steady.