Why is she holding back her feelings? Why won't she admit we're dating?

I can't get this girl to accept my feelings, or even talk about what she feels about me. It's so confusing!

When I ask her out, she always accepts, unless our schedules really clash. She always comes looking for me for attention, or for help. When I tease her in our messages, she teases me back. When I tell her I'm depressed because she hasn't chat to me in a while, she tries to reassure me and lighten up the mood. She trusts me with her Facebook account, and vice-versa I trust her with my credit card (we got lazy to cancel the google wallet for apps).

But she doesn't want anybody to know that we're going out. She avoids liking my Facebook status updates. She unconsciously walks by my side when we're with others, but she is as likely to stray off into another conversational group and doesn't give me special attention. She got a bit defensive when we went out once and I called it a date; she insisted that it wasn't because she doesn't know me enough. So out of respect, I don't try to touch her unnecessarily either, like holding hands.

When I asked if she likes me, she said I'm a good friend. So I ask if she friendzoned me. She laughed and said she doesn't friendzone anyone. Someone special to her would probably be a guy best friend, but she doesn't have one. I ask if she ever fell for anyone, she said she had crushes, but she never gone out with anyone before. Then I ask where I am on the spectrum of best friend, and she said "I wish you hadn't asked me so early, it's hard to say, I can't quite put my finger on things".

I peeped into her Facebook, by far she chats with me the most and most often. A guy is also trying to ask her out couple of times, but she either won't reply or say she's busy. (she often tells me she's busy too, but I just keep probing until I find a day she's free lol). So I supposes she's also not seeing other guys too.

So what exactly is holding her back? I don't get why she wouldn't just admit that we're dating. :/

She still wouldn't admit it.

I think it's because she has too many guys around her. She has a lot of guy friends. So she doesn't feel like I'm different enough.


Most Helpful Girl

  • she's sounds like to me that she likes you and that there's a lilttle something there but its too early to tell for her if she is ready to go there with u & she isn't ready to make anything offical and make it public to everyone. Its most likely going to take her sometime to get know u more and then possibly after sometime it may turn into a offical thing. Your just going to have to go along with it and things will workout when she's more comfortable and ready. she's got an interest in you but not sure if it will turn into some thing big or not.

    • Yeah I see. She's still in school and gets a lot of male attention so maybe it's true that she can't decide well. But I believe if I wait one more year she will graduate, and then I will be the only guy in her life who's still there for her and hopefully she'll understand.

    • Okay, well I hope it all works out for you. :)

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What Girls Said 1

  • It seems like she's keeping you on the back burner. So that your there when she needs you but if she finds something she finds better she can be free to do what she wants. Keep your options open don't think too much about it get to know other people.

    • I see. I think I'll have to work a little bit harder then to convince her that I'm right for her. I have been trying to go out with other girls sometimes, but after comparing around, she really is the best girl for me.

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