Girl is always very excited to see me?

[Anonymous]

I've been talking to a girl for the last few weeks and just can't tell if she actually likes me. First off, every time I say something to her, she gets an instant smile and her voice sounds more tender than usual. She always flirts with me and seems to really enjoy my company.

Second, I've asked her out a couple times but she always has legitimate reasons not to go (sisters baby shower). Problem is she never gives me a day that she's free.

Third, I've noticed she holds longer eye contact with more attractive guys. Since eye contact can tell you a lot about someone, it kinda throws me off.

She flirts with me a lot but since she's busy, I can't ever get her to go out with me. Is she just using these reasons (baby shower) to say no or does she actually still want to go out?

[Annariel]

Hi!

You don't know her that well, so why wouldn't you stop pressuring her with dates and take some time to get to know her and enjoy your company? By constantly asking her out or expecting her to give you a day when she's free you're only making her go farther away. No wonder she looks at other guys! you're not letting her breathe and decide whether she really wants you or not.

Instead of asking her out constantly, why don't you just hand out and enjoy what you have and see how things pan out? Expecting something from someone is a sure way to get in a disaster.

[Asker]

I've known her for over a year and we just recently started talking. We're very comfortable with each other and I haven't pressured her to go on any dates, only asked when she is available! I don't expect anything from her. Though it is considered common courtesy for the girl to offer a day she is free so that she may go out with a guy IF she is interested in him!

[Sal_202]

She's the playful type... the phrase flirting doesn't do any harm ( and effect) is something she walks by. I have a friend who is very flirty with her guy friends not particularly because she wants them, but because the fun of it.

[Asker]

Yeah she is the playful type. So I take it she's probably not interested?

[Sal_202]

Hmm try flirting back and see how's the reaction, but don't do it in a playful way... flirt back with a serious tone. If she's interested she'll go further with it, but if she's not she'll probably laugh in a nervous way. Her noticing the fact you aren't gonna go through this joking phase shall make her realize you're not putting up with it. My friend told me the only reason she does it is simply because of the control she has and by the fun she has seeing you getting all flattered, nervous.. etc. Sad but true. We can give it the similarities of a guy who flatters a girl to get through her pants, but girls flirt to feel good about themselves... it's strange but nevertheless true