Never date a single mom. Agree?

[Anonymous]

Completely agree

Mostly agree

Mostly disagree

Completely disagree

Updates

+1 y

thanks for the answers

Updates

+1 y

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[MidniteM]

There's nothing wrong with dating a single mom, if anything it boils down to preference. The only thing you would have to think about would be the circumstances surrounding their life or yours. Are you the person that can provide for her and her children? Can you acknowledge and accept her life up until this point? Can you look at and treat her children as if they were your own? Do you both live or can you live in an environment appropriate for nurturing a family life? In the end you have to check yourself first to see if you're ok with it? Because it's not fair to her walking in if you can't treat her like any other woman, with respect.

The only other thing would be who she is as a person. And that shouldn't be any different than any other woman without kids.

[aficionado]

I think it goes for both genders. Never date a single parent, unless you are a single parent yourself.

[Rainie_]

I disagree, people have their reasons for single parenthood, as along as that person is stable enough for a relationship and a good parent to their child I really don't see the issue. I guess I am biased since I have a half sister (my dad was a single father) and due to irresponsibility a child was born but he married my mother later and been together with her for 25 years now and going strong so single parenthood can work.

[Anonymous]

people are not ready to take on the extra burden of another kid that's not theirs. But honestly, the single mom is raising a kid on her own not because she wants to but because the husband turned out to be an asshole and left when he couldn't handle the responsibility. I hate our society that just shoves down all the responsibility on the mom, and then shuns her from other happiness...

[CheerGirl38139]

I think 18-24 is way too young to be thinking about such a thing. If you're 10 or 20 years older than that... you're in a much different situation.

[Mysterio421]

Completely agree. Why take care of a kid that's not yours. That's like paying for someone else's insurance for a car that's not yours. On top of that, the mom wants you to help her financially and her schedule is always busy. Would you eat gum that has already been chewed? Would you drink backhanded milk? If not, then why days a single mother. Let the guy that she chose to have sex with take care of them. That's not your problem. Sure some of them are easy, but if you knock her up then you're screwed. Save yourself the headaches and avoid them.

[Bananaman177]

www.kappit.com/img/pics/201504_1720_adgii_sm.jpg

I was never their type before they got pregnant, not sure why that should change now.

www.returnofkings.com/.../bad-boy-2.jpg

[Cosytoasty]

I agree. Why would you, when there are so many other options out there?

Whioe you can make a case for single older mothers who's kids are grown up and left, a young single mother has proven she makes bad decisions in life, hence her being single.

[snowangle]

You realize pregnancy can happen to anyone, right? Even if you used protection or are on birth control. If you are having sex, there's a risk.

[Cosytoasty]

@snowangle Yeah, but you can terminate pregnancy too. Whether you choose to or not falls under one of those "bad decisions".

You can also choose not to sleep with men who would walk away the moment they find out you're pregnant - again another "bad decision".

[snowangle]

Sometimes you think you know a guy and then it turns out he's not there for you. That's the guy's fault; not the girl's for trusting him.

And not everyone is okay with abortion. I personally could never do it... the knowledge that I ended a life inside of me would absolutely destroy me. I don't see how choosing not to kill my own child is a "bad decision."

Disclaimer: I'm pro choice, because even if I disagree with abortion I don't want to control what other women do with their bodies. And I have no children, but if a "surprise" were to happen I would keep it without a doubt.

[Rainie_]

There are also cases where the father has died, I don't think that proves that she's made bad decisions in her life, could also be that he's cheated on her and she had no idea, doesn't mean she made bad decisions, she might've thought she had found the one only to be walked out on. She might've thought she found a suitable partner at first but they started turning to drugs or became violent later. Some issues come later in a relationship that nobody would ever have guessed would happen.
Not all single mothers have made bad decisions in their life.

[Cosytoasty]

But my two examples are linked

1) Sleep with whoever you want, that's fine I have nothing against that - just abort if you get pregnant.
2) Don't want to abort because of ethical reasons? Im fine with that too - just be more selective with your partners.

@Rainie_ I think we both agree that healthy young men do not die very often. It does happen but the majority of young single mothers are because they slept with a chav who knocked her up and left.

Would personally you look at a guy on benefits, always in trouble with the police, always out drinking every night and think "Yes! I want to date that man, have and his children he's going to be a great father"? I don't think so because you have standards.

Like I said though, older single mothers legitimately have the reasons you stated. If you're 18-25 then you have definitely made a bad choice because most guys that age cannot possibly afford or are mature enough to raise children properly.

[Cosytoasty]

That's why to me, deciding to carry the baby to term KNOWING the guy is probably out of his depth despite what good intentions he has, is a bad decision.

[JohnDoe3000]

@snowangle

"Sometimes you think you know a guy and then it turns out he's not there for you."

This is vastly more likely to happen to women who are irresponsible/stupid and therefore not dating material for smart men.

[Rainie_]

Well people make mistakes because we are humans after all, just because you were irresponsible when you were young at some point does not mean that you'll be irresponsible for the rest of your life. And you don't have to be "stupid" to make some wrong decisions in life.

[JohnDoe3000]

@Rainie_

"just because you were irresponsible when you were young at some point does not mean that you'll be irresponsible for the rest of your life."

It does make it a lot more likely and if it takes an unplanned pregnancy to teach you responsibility that in itself is telling of your personality, plus you have an incentive (him dating you and giving you money/security/stability) to tell a man you've changed your ways, even if it's not true so he can't take your word for it.

Maybe I'm a bit harsh because I had to be responsible and study hard to go from nothing to my current lifestyle, a woman who was ever irresponsible enough to have a child with some deadbeat loser just wouldn't match with me: of course there will be lots of guys out there who have been even more irresponsible than young single mothers but simply got lucky because men can't get pregnant.

[snowangle]

Also you're generalizing. How are you going to judge a single parent before you even know their situation?

Plus, just because she's no longer romantic partners with the father doesn't mean he's a loser and a bad father. Maybe he does provide for his kid but they didn't work out as a couple. Although I still fail to see how a guy's failures is something to judge the GIRL for.

[JohnDoe3000]

@snowangle

If it gets to the "should we date" stage I assume the guy already knows her situation (or at least what she told him her situation is). If she's that one in a million exception he'd know.

[Mrwoo99]

Only have sex with them if its obviously offered for free on a platter like anything else but dont develop anything more after that. Women usually after 30 are finished because statistics say women are making the wrong choices in their prime youth when choosing partners.

[Tony1974]

Sorry to all the single moms out there but you all have extremely heavy baggage and this male won't give you his utility if baby's daddy won't. I'm not getting myself involved with somebody who has priorities other than our relationship; the child would always come between us. Just look at Brad Pitt's situation... talk about bad situation; he OWNS it. Stupid fool; this is what thinking with you dick will get you.. EVERY time.

[ritxi]

I completely agree. You will never be important to a single mom. Her kids will always be more important than you. The unique acceptable way for a single guy with no kids to date her is if she is widow and you get on with her kids.

[Jager66]

Dating single moms is like picking through the garbage trying to find gold.

There has never been more single childless women in every age group, with almost no exceptions there is no good reason to ever consider dating a single mom.

[Rissyanne]

In your age range... I would say it depended on why she is a single mother.

[yucel_eden]

It's a reason to be cautious but not to rule out.

How do you know the guy married had kids and left her when he got bored or coudnt handle the responsibility.

[JohnDoe3000]

I guess if I was a father and over the age of 35 I could do it, but otherwise, hell no!

[DGkee]

It depends: there are a lot of things to consider before you make the move! Make sure you don't regret your decision!

[Alistar]

Did it three times. Should never have done it once.

[CHRIS11796]

I don't know. A part of me wants to disgree to this but then another part of me agrees. I'm more in favor though of disagreeing with you on this bud.

[Anonymous]

Exceptions if she is a good person, attractive and the father died.

[lumberman9]

Depends how many kids she has and how old they are.

[LittleSally]

At YOUR age of 18-24 - COMPLETELY agree!

[LittleSally]

*single parents should probably stick together... seems the most reasonable

[beez1717]

I NEVER got what's so attractive about MILFS..

[Marinepilot]

It's a losing proposition anyway you slice it.

[AleDeEurope]

Agreed, 100%

[Kevin11231999]

Well I'm not ready fire my own kids!