Guys if you know that a girl has had sex with black partners does it effect your opinion of her and why?

[joeywalnuts85]

I am a white guy that feels this is actually a real issue, despite how far we as a society have evolved compared to the 1950s way of thinking. I have a unique prospective on this because I have an adopted brother who is black and our best friend to this day is also black. As long as I can remember, if my brother had sex with a girl then many of the white guys we hung out with would immediately lose all attraction for her and almost act as if she was dirty. Before jumping to conclusions thinking im from somewhere like Arkansas or Alabama where im sure the dynamics of interracial dating has a slightly more old fashion view. I grew up in wilmington Delaware where many consider a ghetto. My white friends who acted like this were not racist or open about their opinions on it with anyone outside of their close white friends. And would act like nothing bothered them about when anyone else was around?

[Bandit74]

-Does it affect my opinion of her as a person?

ONLY if they fit the stereotype of the drug dealer or gang member then yes I would lose respect for her.

-Would I lose attraction towards her in general?

Yeah, but like your friends I wouldn't admit it in real life. I know how that conversation plays out and I have no interest in it🙈

I will be honest and admit that it is partly because of porn. If I learned that a girl had slept with a black guy I would have the image of a black guy with an 8 inch dick having agressive porn style sex with her and that would make me lose attraction towards her. Now before I get petty insults about how I have a microdick, Im actually slightly above average based on statistics. Still I don't like the idea of a girl having been with a guy in the 7-8 inch range and would rather her just settle down with someone else in that range if thats what she likes. The way I see it is we would both be happier that way.

Also, I don't like the imagery of a girl sleeping with a guy who looks vastly different from me. I want to feel like I have the physical features of her "type". And as a plale white guy, a black guy is pretty much on the opposite end of the spectrum from what I look like.

"My white friends who acted like this were not racist or open about their opinions on it with anyone outside of their close white friends. And would act like nothing bothered them about when anyone else was around?"

Well... no shit. They know how people would react if they were to admit that it makes them lose interest. They smartly realize that there is a "correct answer" to that question and that they are better off biting their tongues and keeping it to themselves.

[joeywalnuts85]

I do appreciate your honesty because many many many white dudes feel like they can't get into a relationship with someone because of this and almost treat these women like they are "contaminated " but in reality those stereotypes are not accurate. And as a fellow porn watcher I know the majority of the dudes could make me feel insecure no matter the race. But now that I'm a sex therapist I've realized we men in general put way too much pressure on ourselves about size when there are many more important things that matter to women

[Maik567]

Yeah this is true and still happens. Personally the majority of people in my area are white so when a white girl does end up dating a black guy it's usually because she's that type of a white girl who's just obsessed with black guys. So that's why I tend to avoid girls like that completely. On top of that I'm a white guy who likes white girls so I'd rather just date a white girl who likes white guys, it doesn't have to be more complicated than that.

That being said I know there are plenty of other reasons why many white guys do this too. Maybe they're insecure and buy too much into all the black stereotypes, maybe they're straight up racist or white supremacist, maybe they've had bad experiences with girls like that, or maybe girls like that just don't tend to be their type.

[Maik567]

Oh and I'd like to add that this isn't just specific to white people either, I know some black guys who don't want to date black girls who date white guys and some latino guys who don't date girls who date black guys.

[Anonymous]

No they are absolutely racist -lol. they know how they feel is wrong which is why they'd ask like it didn't bother them when other people were around. It's pathetic but I agree, I also know a lot of guys like that (atleast I did in high school... I am sure they still are I'm just not friends with them anymore)... I am white and have only ever dated a few guys that were all white but I'd never date a guy who I thought for a second could be like that. I am in Philly, PA by the way... also not in the South.

[SarahsSummer]

I think as opposed to being solely racism, it goes to guys insecurities and if they see a woman has or had an attraction to a black man, he may feel she wouldn't be interested in him (the white guy) so he reverses the sentiment so as to not get hurt and just proclaims he's not interested.

[rubyrose83]

I have a mixed race son. I think a lot of white guys are just intimidated because of stereotypes they feel like they won't measure up. Complete BS

[joeywalnuts85]

Bing bing bing bing I think that you hit it spot on I just didn't want to be the first person to say it although I was hoping some guys would have replied honestly but even with your identity mostly concealed it must be difficult to admit the truth

[rubyrose83]

Yeah you can tell it's a big insecurity with guys just by all the questions asked on here comparing white & black. And men call women insecure hahaha

[joeywalnuts85]

Honestly the white friends I had would never admit that the stereotypes of black men being bigger was the issue. There excuse was that black men will fuck any thing and are more likely to have stds so they wouldn't consider having sex with anyone who has a history of it. I would always tell my brother about the stuff they said and we would just laugh especially because I only dated black girls , but to them that was acceptable

[cavmanier]

Maybe their feelings are related to them associating a girl attracted to a person with much different physical features as a person that isn't as attracted to them if that makes sense. Like how if a guy or girl is not attracted to a person that is bi sexual because that bi sexual person is also attracted to people that look dramatically different than them. There could be some kind of underlining psychological reason given how common this is.

[RedThread]

It doesn't change my opinion of her in any way. I'd be a hypocrite if it did because I've been very attracted to women outside of my race and/or ethnicity. What kind of person would I be for faulting someone else for having a similar attraction? It all amounts to insecurity in the end anyway.

[joeywalnuts85]

Well said

[Cartoonfish863]

No problem here mate. It's 2017 white girls date black guys. Either you are giving in to peer pressure or you have reservations about it yourself. If you like the girl ask her out and forget about her past partners. Would you date a black girl who as had white boyfriends. There is no difference

[Anonymous]

The real question is isn't how other men feel towards sleeping with whoever they want.

The real question is whether guys share the same feelings towards the subject as you do...
and by the looks of all the answers on here so far, I'm guessing no.

[joeywalnuts85]

What do you mean I posted it like 3 minutes ago

[BaeBeeee]

I hope we come to an era where people can be with whoever they want without being judged because of their partners race

[DodgersGM]

I couldn't care less. I'm not racist and I'm not insecure.

[Anonymous]

This is an odd theory.

I've banged awhite dude with an 8 incher and had better sex with the next guy

[Opinion Owner]

Who was much smaller.

The V doesn't work that way.

[jacquesvol]

Indeed: it positively affects my opinion about her: she's less likely to be a prude bigot.

[HarrisonWells]

doesn't bother me as long as she's honest and doesn't cheat

[Anonymous]

Wouldn't bother me but I wonder if white girls will want to have sex with me since I've been with black girls

[Phoenix98]

And why would I care about false sterotypes?

[Anonymous]

If someone thinks like that, that's very ignorant.

[Yumix]

I don't understand how that could be a problem

[cupidkisses]

i don't think that it matters

[Anonymous]

Well that's racist.

[ChocEyes1]

Not a tiny bit